Jump to content


Board Sponsors
  • Posts

  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won


Julian2 last won the day on April 8 2012

Julian2 had the most liked content!

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Not Telling
  • Location
    Chiang Rai

Recent Profile Visitors

The recent visitors block is disabled and is not being shown to other users.

Julian2's Achievements


Newbie (1/14)



  1. How dare you make me open a political website with the word "Free" in the title.
  2. *Phone rings, woman answers.* A pervert, with heavy breathing, says, "Have you got a tight, unshaven twat?" Woman replies, "Yes, he's playing on his computer - who shall I say is calling?"
  3. Police work must be entertaining as well as dangerous. Recently, a female police officer arrested Patrick Lawrence, 22 year old white male, fornicating with a pumpkin in the middle of the night. The next day, at the Gwinnett County (GA) courthouse, Lawrence was charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, public indecency and public intoxication. The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch on his way home from a drinking session when he decided to stop, 'You know how a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around for miles or at least I thought there wasn't anyone around' he stated. Lawrence went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purpose, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his pressing need. 'Guess I was really into it, you know?' he commented with evident embarrassment. In the process of doing the deed, Lawrence failed to notice an approaching police car and was unaware of his audience until Officer Brenda Taylor approached him. 'It was an unusual situation, that's for sure,' said Officer Taylor. 'I walked up to Lawrence and he's just banging away at this pumpkin.' Officer Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Lawrence . 'I said: 'Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you're having sex with a pumpkin??' He froze and was clearly very surprised that I was there, and then he looked me straight in the face and said: 'A pumpkin? Shit ... is it midnight already?'
  4. Welsh jokes? It's come to this? 1) What do call an Englishman holding a bottle of champagne after a Six Nations game? Waiter. 2) Did you hear about the Valleys girl who wanted to get dirty with her boyfriend? He took her to a coalmine. 3) What do you call a Welshman with no brain? Dim. 4) The All Blacks were playing England, and after the half-time whistle blew, they found themselves ahead 50-0, Jonah Lomu getting eight tries. The rest of the team decided to head for the pub instead of playing the second half, leaving Jonah to go out on his own. “No worries,†Jonah told them, “I’ll join you later and tell you what happened.†After the game Jonah headed for the pub where he told his team mates the final score – 95-3. “What?!â€, they said, “How did you let them get three points?†Jonah replied apologetically: “I was sent off with 20 minutes to go.†5) What do you get if you cross the WRU with an OXO cube? A laughing stock. 6) Dai and Blodwyn were engaged to be married. Dai was sent by his company to London on a two-week sales training course. The course was fine but the evenings were boring and by the second week Dai was fed up with sitting around in his hotel bedroom and went down to the bar for a few drinks where he met a couple of girls of the night, who enticed him into spending his money. On returning home Dai’s conscience got the better of him and he broke down and confessed to Blodwyn that he had been unfaithful to her twice. Blodwyn said she was glad Dai had been so honest – she too had to confess that she had been unfaithful twice whilst Dai had been away... once with the Tredegar Male Voice Choir and once with the Ebbw Vale RFC first XV. 7) An English politician was giving a speech in Aberystwyth. He said: “I was born an Englishman. I have been an Englishman all my life, and I will die an Englishman!†“What’s wrong, boyo?†shouted a voice from the crowd.“Got no ambition, have you?†8) What’s the Ospreys and a three pin British electrical plug got in common? They’re both useless in Europe. 9) Rhys: Doctor, I can’t stop singing the Green, Green Grass of Home. Doctor: That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome. Rhys: Is it common? Doctor: It’s not unusual. 10) Cabbie Rhys Parry was taking an American tourist from Bristol to Cardiff. When they were going over the Severn Bridge, the American told Rhys he had a longer bridge on his ranch in Colorado. When they arrived in Cardiff, Rhys showed him Cardiff Castle and he said his garage in Colorado was twice as big and only took a week to build. When the tourist spotted the Millennium Stadium, he asked Rhys what it was. He replied: “I don’t know, mate, it wasn’t there this morning.†Read More http://www.walesonline.co.uk/news/wales-news/tm_headline=top-10-welsh-jokes---&method=full&objectid=19307123&siteid=50082-name_page.html#ixzz1qpUIQ411
  5. Pity my idiot brother in law didn't make his bomb joke in a US airport instead of Adelaide. He may have been pacified with a few .223 caliber rounds instead of almost getting his own daughter kicked off the flight she was catching. Now you know why I never have relatives seeing me off on a flight.
  6. Russian president suggests Romney use reason, head March 27, 2012 — MOSCOW (AP) — Russian President Dmitry Medvedev has sharply suggested that Mitt Romney use his head and remember what year he's living in after the Republican presidential contender said Moscow was America's "No. 1 geopolitical foe." Romney described Russia in those terms while criticizing President Barack Obama for his caught-on-mic remarks to Medvedev that he would have more room to negotiate on missile defense if he is re-elected in November. During a briefing Tuesday in Seoul, where he and Obama were attending a nuclear security summit, the Russian leader said Romney's remarks "smacked of Hollywood" and sounded as if they came from the Cold War era. Medvedev advised the White House hopefuls, including Romney, to "rely on reason, use their heads," adding, "that's not harmful for a presidential candidate." He further said, "It's 2012, not the mid-1970s, and whatever party he belongs to, he must take the existing realities into account." NATO's U.S.-led missile defense plans have long been an irritant in relations with Moscow, which has rejected the U.S. assurances that the shield is needed to fend off an Iranian missile threat and voiced concern that it will eventually grow into a threat to Russia's nuclear deterrent. In a Monday meeting on the sidelines of the summit, Obama's remarks to Medvedev were picked up by a microphone without either apparently knowing. "This is my last election," Obama was heard telling the Russian president. "After my election, I have more flexibility." Medvedev replied in English that he would convey the message to Vladimir Putin, who reclaimed the presidency in an election earlier this month and will formally take office in May. Seeking to contain the gaffe, Obama has said he wants to spend the rest of the year working through technical issues related to the missile defense dispute with the Russians and that it was not surprising that a deal couldn't be completed quickly. Medvedev echoed Obama on Tuesday, saying that "there are no secrets here, and it's not surprising that a number of issues are better solved in a specific political situation." "There are good and bad periods for solving things," he said. "And it's quite obvious that the situation when all political forces are stable is the best time for that." Medvedev, who is expected to take over as prime minister, the job Putin is leaving, added that while Obama has always stood firm for the U.S. interests, he has been a good partner who has helped establish a "friendly and trusting" dialogue. "I consider our dialogue with President Obama over the last few years to have been exemplary," Medvedev said. "The most important thing for a dialogue is for the parties to hear one another. And he has been a very comfortable partner in that sense." http://www.mail.com/int/news/europe/1162422-russian-president-suggests-romney-use-reason-head.html#.2396-stage-teaser1-1
  7. Anthony Shadid died last week, he'll be missed as well. After a decade reporting in Iraq and being kidnapped last year in Libya, Shadid died from an asthma attack in Syria. http://www.theglobalmail.org/feature/the-middle-easts-translator/70/
  8. TOPs used to have an imported potato straw called Pomsticks that I found very tasty. Since the flood they have become scarce though.
  9. Do you think the additional air strikes would have made a difference? I think the success of the invasion hinged on the country rising against Castro at the same time which just didn't happen.
  10. Attempted suicide bombing of the US Capitol thwarted The man accused of attempting a suicide bombing at the US Capitol building fell into what has become a typical trap set for would-be terrorist attackers in the United States. Amine El Khalifi, a 29-year-old immigrant from Morocco in the United States illegally, was arrested Friday following an undercover operation in which US agents – acting on Mr. El Khalifi’s expressed desire and intent to attack government and civilian targets on behalf of Al Qaeda – posed as collaborators, providing what seemed to be operable firearms and explosives. http://www.alaskadispatch.com/article/attempted-suicide-bombing-us-capitol-thwarted So when are the travel warnings being released?
  11. It should certainly be applied if the US company closes in the US and takes it's manufacturing division overseas to take advantage of the $2 a day wages in Indonesia. When are these idiots going to realise that eventually no one in the US will be able to afford $200 for a pair of shoes.
  12. Pretty much SOP for the incumbent when the opposition candidates can't get their ducks in a row. I believe the US right is too deeply divided to agree on a viable candidate for many years to come. The McCain/Palin ticket was probably better than anything they will come up with this election. The bottom line, of course, is that Obama isn't as bad as the corporate media try make him out. Even the worse thing I've heard some of our Republicans say about him is that he uses a Teleprompter.
  13. A Huffington Post writer suggested today that Obama could run with Hillary as VP and Joe going to State if they win. That could almost work.
  14. Years ago the premier of my home state appointed a prominent member of the Aboriginal community as governor. (A purely ceremonial position). It wasn't a success but I'll always remember while partaking of a refreshing ale in an inner city Adelaide pub on a hot Saturday afternoon, an extremely drunk Aborigine entered the bar and was refused service. As he was leaving he turned to us and, with enormous dignity, said... "my cousin, he your fucking gubner".
  15. I have an Aussie ex Vietnam vet mate in Cebu. He keeps all the receipts when he buys medication overseas and hands them in for a refund in Australia. Not sure how good the exchange rate they give him is though.
  • Create New...