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RayRay last won the day on December 12 2011

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  1. Some say the decline started when they took prayer out of school. To that I say bullshit. The decline started when they no longer allowed snot-nosed brats that were acting up to get their ass beat. In junior high school we had a principal named Mr. Washington. This guy was seriously bad news for anyone unfortunate enough to be on the receiving end of his paddle. Prior to his career in education he was a linebacker in the NFL. Needless to say most everyone tried their best to stay out of trouble.
  2. Say what you want, but I would give Ann the greatest two minutes of her life.
  3. Which one of these guys was the parking attendant that they claimed owned the place?
  4. Stayed there one night but honestly got so f'ed up I went back to the room and passed out. Was probably in the room in a conscious state for a total of 30 minutes. Well it took about an hour trying to figure out how to turn off all the flashing / blinking lights before I could pass out; but you get the picture. Have heard from others that yes it is a great time for a one time visit. Sorry but I don't have much recollection.
  5. Oops, saw that the golden retriever joke was already posted.
  6. What do you call a smart blonde? A golden retriever.
  7. Little Sally came home from school and with a smile on her face and told her mother. 'Frankie Jones showed me his willy today!' Before the mother could raise a concern, Sally went on to say, 'It reminded me of a peanut' Relaxing with a hidden smile, Sally's Mum asked, 'Really small was it?' Sally replied, 'No...salty!'
  8. A U.S. Marine squad was marching north of Fallujah when they came upon an Iraqi terrorist, badly injured and unconscious. On the opposite side of the road was an American Marine in a similar but less serious state. The Marine was conscious and alert and as first aid was given to both men, the squad leader asked the injured Marine what had happened. The Marine reported, 'I was heavily armed and moving north along the highway here, and coming south was a heavily armed insurgent. We saw each other and both took cover in the ditches along the road. I yelled to him that Saddam Hussein was a miserable, lowlife scumbag who got what he deserved, and he yelled back that Ted Kennedy is a fat, good-for-nothing, left wing liberal drunk who doesn't know how to drive. So I said that Osama Bin Ladin dresses and acts like a frigid, mean-spirited lesbian! He retaliated by yelling, 'Oh yeah? Well, so does Hillary Clinton!' 'And, there we were, in the middle of the road, laughing, when a truck hit us.'
  9. Two guys with black eyes are seated next to each other on a flight from New York to Pittsburgh. The first guy asks the second, "I notice you have a black eye, do you mind telling me how that happened?" Second guy says, "Well when I was standing in line to buy my business partner and myself tickets for this flight, I noticed the ticket agent had an incredible set of breasts. The line was long so I had a lot of time to stare and admire these wonderful creations. By the time I got to the front of the line I meant to say 'I need two tickets to Pittsburgh' but I slipped up and said 'I need two Pickets to Tittsburgh'. Needless to say the ticket agent was offended and she punched me in the face; hence the black eye." First guy says, "Oh sorry to hear that, that's called a Freudian slip. That's when you mean to say one thing, get distracted and it comes out wrong. Happens all the time." Second guy asks, "Well now that I told you my story, do you mind telling me how you got your black eye?" First guy responds, "Oh funny enough I also had a Freudian slip. This morning when I was at the breakfast table I meant to ask my wife 'Honey can you pass the milk?'. Instead I slipped and it came out 'You fucking bitch you ruined my life.' "
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