BelgianBoy

But as obviously you have a clue, would you mind explaining the numbers then ? BB

Funniest 'Date' Story (true!) This is probably the funniest date story ever, first date or not!!! We have all had bad dates but this takes the cake. Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The winner described her worst first date experience. There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize! She said it was midwinter...Snowing and quite cold... And the guy had taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City, Utah. It was a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers, after all, and had never met before. The outing was fun, but relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that afternoon. They were driving back down the mountain, when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra latte. They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the middle of nowhere! Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did for awhile. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going, there came a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her go beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his car. They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants down and started. In the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself. Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation. Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation. As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender. Thoughts of tongues frozen to poles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem, due to the extreme cold. Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment, she answered her date's concerns about 'what is taking so long' with a reply that indeed, she was 'freezing her butt off' and in need of some assistance! He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing. She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma. Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a real problem. Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free. So, as she looked the other way, her first time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender. As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight Show prize hands down. Or perhaps that should be 'pants down.' And you thought your first date was embarrassing. Jay Leno's comment..."This gives a whole new meaning to being pissed off." Oh and how did the first date turn out? He became her husband and was sitting next to her there on the Leno show.

well, its not a bad movie, just weak.... and if you have never been to Venice (la originale), then its a nice virtual tour BB

just watched The Tourist with La Jolie and Depp...... weak movie, weak story, all IMO of course... BB

use it to marinate some meat.......

you guys are all wrong, its a brick of wine !

at least someone is keeping track of it, funny to some, or not at least your reply is BB

Passenger to a Sexy Air Hostess : What is your name ? Air Hostess answers : Mercedes, Sir ! Passenger says : Lovely name ! Any relation with Mercedes Benz ? Air hostess : Same Price

pipes and tattoo anyone ? 7RWIJ2cEzGE

Passenger to a Sexy Air Hostess : What is your name ? Air Hostess answers : Mercedes, Sir ! Passenger says : Lovely name ! Any relation with Mercedes Benz ? Air hostess : Same Price

Teacher : Can you tell me the name of 3 great kings who have brought happiness & peace into people's lives? Student : smo-king , drin-king & fuc-king...

just back from Robin Hood with Russell Crowe, good film 8.5/10 for me or *** BB

actually here he is called "Jantje".....

Little Dave jokes..... LITTLE DAVE ON MATH (Part 1) A teacher asks her class, 'If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?' She calls on little DAVE. He replies, 'None, they will all fly away with the first gunshot..' The teacher replies, 'The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking.' Then little DAVE says, 'I have a question for YOU. There are 3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream: One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream. The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone. The third is biting off the top of the ice cream. Which one is married?' The teacher, blushing a great deal, replied, 'Well, I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the cone.' To which Little DAVE replied, 'The correct answer is 'the one with the wedding ring on,' but I like your thinking..' LITTLE DAVE ON MATH (Part 2) Little DAVE returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic. 'Why?' asks the father? 'The teacher asked 'How much is 2x3,'' I said '6', replies DAVE. 'But that's right!' says his dad. 'Yeah, but then she asked me 'How much is 3x2?'' 'What's the fuckin' difference?' asks the father. 'That's what I said!' LITTLE DAVE ON ENGLISH Little DAVE goes to school, and the teacher says, 'Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?' DAVE says 'Mas-tur-bate.' Miss Rogers smiles and says, 'Wow, little DAVE, that's a mouthful..' Little DAVE says, 'No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob.' LITTLE DAVE ON GRAMMAR Little DAVE was sitting in class one day. All of a sudden, he needed to go to the toilet. He yelled out, 'Miss Jones, I need to take a piss!!' The teacher replied, 'Now, DAVE, that is NOT the proper word to use in this situation. The correct word you want to use is 'urinate.' Please use the word 'ur-i-nate' in a sentence correctly, and I will allow you to go.' Little DAVE, thinks for a bit, and then says, 'You're an eight, but if you had bigger tits, you'd be a TEN!' LITTLE DAVE ON GRAMMAR (Part 2) One day, during lessons on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show of hands from those who could use the word 'beautiful' in the same sentence twice.... First, she called on little Suzie, who responded with, 'My father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it.' 'Very good, Suzie,' replied the teacher. She then called on little Michael. 'My mummy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully.' She said, 'Excellent, Michael!' Then the teacher reluctantly called on little DAVE. 'Last night at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was pregnant, and he said 'Beautiful, just fuckin' beautiful!'' LITTLE DAVE ON GETTING OLDER Little DAVE was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar after another. After the 6th one a man on the bench across from him said, 'Son, you know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, and make you fat.' Little DAVE replied, 'My grandfather lived to be 107 years old.' The man asked, 'Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?' Little DAVE answered, 'No, he minded his own fuckin' business. I LOVE Little DAVE!!!!! BB

great movie, must see.

Conversation with God : Man: God? God: Yes? Man: Can I ask you something? God: Of course! Man: What is for you a million of years? God: A second. Man: And a million dollars? God: A penny. Man: God, Can you give me a penny? God: Wait a second.

"A Lion would never cheat on his wife.. but a Tiger wood"

what are the 3 major catastrophies of the 20th century ? Hiroshima 45 Chernobyl 86 Windows 95 BB

Saw it as well, a bit of a loose cannon IMO..... Saw Moon as well, great movie, but then I am sci-fi addicted... Also saw : - District 9 : nice idea, cute movie, B production - Pandorum : good movie - Management - The hangover : about a bacherlors'party in Vegas, very funny stuff BB

God went to the Arabs and said, 'I have Commandments for you that will make your lives better.' The Arabs asked, 'What are Commandments? Can you give us an example?' God said, 'For example .......... Thou shall not kill.' The Arabs were shocked, 'What? Not kill? No way! Killing and massacring innocent people is our birth-right and the only reason for our existence. No, we are not interested.' So God went to the Africans and said, 'I have Commandments.' The Africans wanted an example. God said, 'For example ........... Honour thy Father and Mother.' The Africans were dismayed. They said, 'Father? Yo maan! Can't tell for sure who our fathers are, maan!' So God went to the Mexicans and said, 'I have Commandments.' The Mexicans wanted an example. God said, 'For example ........... Thou shall not steal.' The Mexicans were flabbergasted. They said, 'No steal? No steal?? Hey Senor, we no steal then how we live, huh? Gracias, but no!' So God went to the French and said, 'I have Commandments.' The French wanted an example. God said, 'For example ........... Thou shall not commit adultery.' The French were stunned. They said, 'What? Not commit ze adultery ....... ? Non, non, non. Non Monsieur. Pardonnez vous. We, ze French, must have ze romance.' So God went to the Jews and said, 'I have Commandments.' The Jews asked, 'Commandments? How much do they cost?' God replied, 'Nothing. They are free.' The Jews answered, 'Good. We shall take Ten!'

KS, I have a 50" plasma TV since 4 years with a great surround homecinema equipment. And yet, it is not the same thing as sitting in the movietheater and soaking it all up on a huge screen. But YMMV..... BB

I mean big screen as in the cinema, at home I'll watch it on TV.

Watched 2012 last night. Weak storyline great effects Overrated IMO but lets say I was well entertained. Better on a large screen than downloading & watching at home..... Then again YMMV BB

YEP it sure is...... both are ok though. BB