Flashermac

Little Johnny and his family were having Sunday dinner at his grandmother's house. Everyone was seated around the table as the food was being served. When Little Johnny received his plate, he started eating right away. "Johnny! Please wait until we say our prayer," said his mother. "I don't have to," the boy replied. "Of course, you do," his mother insisted. "We always say a prayer before eating at our house." "That's our house," Johnny explained. "But this is grandma's house and she knows how to cook!

Sensible Observations 1) When I die, I want to die like my grandfather--who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car." --Author Unknown 2) Advice for the day: If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: "Take two aspirin" and "Keep away from children." --Author Unknown 3) "Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar." --Drew Carey 4) "The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house." --Jeff Foxworthy 5) "If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there is a man on base." --Dave Barry 6) "Relationships are hard. It's like a full time job, and we should treat it like one. If your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to leave you, they should give you two weeks' notice. There should be severance pay, and the day before they leave you, they should have to find you a temp." --Bob Ettinger 7) "My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat. I said, 'Mom, they weren't trying to teach you how to swim.'" --Paula Poundstone 8) "A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: "Duh." --Conan O'Brien 9) "Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?? I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God ... I could be eating a slow learner." --Lynda Montgomery 10) "I think that's how Chicago got started. Bunch of people in New York said, 'Gee, I'm enjoying the crime and the poverty, but it just isn't cold enough. Let's go west.'" --Richard Jeni 11) "If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead." --Johnny Carson 12) "Sometimes I think war is God's way of teaching us geography." --Paul Rodriguez 13) "My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that's the law." --Jerry Seinfeld 14) "Remember in elementary school, you were told that in case of fire you have to line up quietly in a single file line from smallest to tallest. What is the logic in that? Do tall people burn slower?" --Warren Hutcherson 15) "Bigamy is having one wife/husband too many. Monogamy is the same." --Oscar Wilde 16) "Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself." --Mark Twain 17) "Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At least they can find Afghanistan." --A. Whitney Brown 18) "You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, 'My God, you're right! I never would've thought of that!'" --Dave Barry 19) Do you know why they call it "PMS"? Because "Mad Cow Disease" was taken. --Unknown, presumed deceased 20) "Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer." - W. C. Fields

One day a father asked his 11-year old son if he knew about the birds and the bees. "I don't want to know," the boy said, bursting into tears. "Promise me you won't ever tell me." Confused, the father asked what was wrong. The boy sobbed, "When I was six, I got the 'There's no Easter Bunny' speech. At seven, I got the 'There's no Tooth Fairy' speech. When I was eight, you hit me with the 'There's no Santa' speech. Now if you're going to tell me that grown-ups don't really fuck, I'll have nothing left to live for!"

Earl and Bob, two good old boys, were sitting in a boat on the Tennessee River - fishin', smokin' their pipes, and drinkin' whiskey. Suddenly, Bob spoke up. "Ya know, I think I'm gonna divorce my wife. She ain't said a word to me in over 2 months now." Earl sipped his whiskey, thought a while, and then replied. "You better think that over, Bob. Women like that are hard to find."

Investment tips for 2007 Investment tips for 2007 for all of you with any money left: Be aware of the next expected mergers, so you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks. Watch for these consolidations. 1. Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W. R. Grace Co. Will merge and become: Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace. 2. Polygram Records, Warner Bros., and Zesta Crackers join forces and become: Poly, Warner Cracker. 3.3M will merge with Goodyear and become: MMM Good. 4. Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become: ZipAudiDoDa 5. FedEx is expected to join its competitor, UPS, and become: FedUP 6.Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will become: Fairwell Honeychild. 7.Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become: Poupon Pants. 8. Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women will become: Knott NOW! And finally............ 9. Victoria 's Secret and Smith & Wesson will merge under the new name: Titty Titty Bang Bang

An American Indian boy asked his father, "Papa, why is it that we always have long names, while my white friends have short names like Bill or Sam or Jack?" His father replied, "My son, our names represent a symbol, a sign or a poem for our culture not like the white men, who live all together and repeat their names from generation to generation. Also, it is part of our makeup that in spite of everything, we survive. For example, your sister's name is Small Romantic Moon Over The Lake, because on the night she was born, there was a beautiful moon reflected in the lake. Then there's your brother, Big White Horse of the Prairies, because he was born on a day that the big white horse who gallops over the prairies of the world appeared near our camp and is a symbol of our capacity to live and the life force of our people. It's very simple and easy. Now do you understand, Little Broken Condom Made in China?

Politicians' promises still are only valid until they get elected!

<< there's a newer convention that says that forced treaties are not valid. >> Tell that to the victors of WWII. The UN Charter on Human Rights also says it is illegal to expel the population from conquered territory and replace it with your own. Want to try to put eastern Europe back the way it was in 1945? "The current Cuban government considers the U.S. presence in Guantánamo to be an illegal occupation of the area, and argues that the Cuban-American Treaty, which established the lease in 1903, now violates article 52 of the 1969 Vienna Convention on the Law of Treaties, though the issue is still open to argument. However, Article 4 of the same document states that Vienna Convention on the Law of Treaties shall not be retroactively applied to any treaties made before itself." Didn't realise this: "Until the 1953-59 revolution, thousands of Cubans commuted daily from outside the base to jobs within. In mid-1958, vehicular traffic was stopped; workers were required to walk through the base's several gates. Public Works Center buses were pressed into service almost overnight to carry the tides of workers to and from the gate. In 2006, only two elderly Cubans still crossed the base's North East Gate daily to work on the base; the Cuban government prohibits new recruitment." http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guantanamo_Bay_Naval_Base

Sort of like Ceuta.

Unless things have changed, a lot of Cubans make their living working at Guantanamo.

You wouldn't even recognise the old Bangkok if I showed you photos. If you want to see it, go around the Grand Palace or over to Chinatown. Not much left besides that.

Which is one reason the landowner chose an "extra-legal" solution. With his money, he knew he could use force. Fat chance the renters have of fighting a multi-millionaire in court. My tendency is to side with the proles against the robber barons. p.s. Multiply 18,000 times the number of renters (30) times 12 and I bet you get a rather respectable return for doing nothing with a vacant piece of land - 6,480,000 baht. Then multiply that times 20 = 129,600,000 baht. I think I could scrape by on that.

Equal time for the Irish ... Mrs. Donovan was walking down O'Connell Street in Dublin when she encountered Father Flaherty. The priest greeted her warmly. "Top o' the mornin'. Is it Mrs. Donovan you are and didn't I marry you and yer hoosband 2 years ago?" She replied, "Aye, that you did, Fadder." The priest asked, "And be there any wee little ones yet?" She replied, "No, not yet, Fadder. He said, "Well, I'm goin' to Rome next week and I'll light a candle for ye." She replied, "Oh, thank ye, Fadder." They then parted ways. Some years later, they chanced to meet again. Father Flaherty asked, 'Ah, Mrs. Donovan, how are ye these days?' She replied, 'Oh, very well, Fadder!' Father Flaherty asked, "And tell me, have ye any been blessed wit wee ones now?" "Oh yes, Fadder! T'ree sets o'twins and 4 singles, 10 in all!" "That's wonderful!" he said. "And how is yer loving hoosband doing?" She replied, "He's gone off to Rome to blow out yer f*ckin' candle!"

If the guy had been paying me 18,000 baht a month to park his cart on my front lawn for 20 years or more, I think I might tend to cut him a little slack. Again let's face it, this landowner has made millions of baht over the years from these renters. He can't be hurting for money. The word GREED comes to mind. Greed and impatience to make even more - that plus the feeling that since he is rich, he is above the law and can do whatever he wants. Who needs courts of law anyway ...

Here's the problem: << "I have never fallen behind in my rent schedule," Lue said. He said he always paid the rent through Samruai, who assured him that the business could continue as usual even when a board was erected to demand that the stalls relocate or face legal action. "Samruai told me that he could settle things with the landlord," Lue said. "But in whatever case talk is a much better option. One should not resort to violence." >> The agent was telling the renters everything was fine and apparently still collecting the rent. What did he do with it? Also, the sign said "or face legal action". The owner has a rather strange idea of what "legal action" consitutes. Apparently, you also think there is no need to trouble the courts with such matters, especially since going to court can take a very long time. Just hire some thugs to sort it out. Cheaper and quicker.

<< then handling these issue in a quick, non-violent way. >> Yeah, sending 100 plus goons in to destroy the place is really non-violent. What's violent ... if they killed everybody?

They'd probably ignore you - unless for some reason you tried to stop them. Chuwit sent his raiding party to destroy Soi 10 at around 3 am. They seem to like the hours when no one is likely to be around, including the police. p.s. This is a variation on an old theme. Landlords used to set fire to slum areas, often managing to kill a few residents in the process. The location in this case made that impractical.

At 4 am what would you be doing in a closed market?

More in today's NATION: Lt-Colonel Pairach Saiyalert, an inspector with Makkasan police, said 17 people had lodged complaints about the shops' demolition. "We will investigate the case further and bring culprits to justice," Pairach said. He estimated the damage to be around Bt1.2million. One of the complainants, Lue Nakpayon, said he had operated his stall for more than 10 years and never thought that such violent means would be used against traders. "I have never fallen behind in my rent schedule," Lue said. He said he always paid the rent through Samruai, who assured him that the business could continue as usual even when a board was erected to demand that the stalls relocate or face legal action. "Samruai told me that he could settle things with the landlord," Lue said. "But in whatever case talk is a much better option. One should not resort to violence." Lue said he had heard that Suraphan had arranged to meet Samruai today.

THE NATION 26 August 2007 More than 100 men ravage a Bangkok market More than 100 robust men stormed into a Bangkok market and destroyed about 30 stalls there early Sunday morning. It took them less than 10 minutes to turn the stalls into ruins. The Makkasan Police Station was alerted about what happened at around 4 am. Witnesses said they saw more than 20 vehicles suspiciously parking at the entrance of the market, which is near Uthai Tharam Temple and the Bangkok's Royal City Avenue (RCA), before they moved into the market and released more than 100 vandals. "I am going to demand compensations for damages done," Samruai Nongpong, alias Ruai RCA, said in his capacity as the market's manager. He said all stalls in the market had operated on leased lots with a monthly rent of Bt18,000 for more than 20 years, until three months ago when landowner and businessman Suraphan Wongkarnpot refused to take the rent saying the lease contracts had expired. "I told him we would relocate once we found a new place to set up the stalls, but then such a violent incident happened," Samruai said.

An older gentleman had a toothache. Naturally, he went to the dentist. The dentist looked and said the tooth had to come out. He started preparing a shot of Novocain. "No needles!" the startled patient said. "I can't stand needles!" "How about some nitrous oxide gas?" the dentist asked. "No! Anything covering my face and I panic. I feel like I am going to have a heart attack. No gas!" "Do you have any problem with pills?" the dentist finally asked. "Uh, no," the patient says. "A pill would be fine." "All right, said the doc. "I'm going to give you a Viagra tablet." "Viagra?" the patient asked. "I didn't know Viagra was a painkiller." "It's not, but it'll give you something to hold on to while I pull your tooth."

As I recall, the victims reported they were offered 10,000 baht "compensation" - take it or leave it. And some had one million baht plus invested in their business.

SHHHHHHHHHHHHHSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHH!!! I you trying to get yourself shot or something! Repeat: "It never happened."

There was an internet shop that was destroyed - after the computers were removed. Wonder what happened to the washing machines at the laundry. Think there was also a travel agency. It wasn't all just beer bars and pool bars. Wonder which six business owners are being compensated. There were a lot more people who lost everything than just six.