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There's been a frenzied prominent plethora of posts on here of late (i.e. two or three posts during the last 6 months, mostly by me ) all respectfully rueing and lovingly lamenting the apparent and oft-reported demise of the once-cherished 'girlfriend experience': the GFE, that pleasant and mutually-affectionate faux courtship ritual by which a punter exclusively rents a bird not just for one hour or one night, but for several days and nights, perhaps the entire duration of his holidaying sojourn, thereby enjoying the 'experience' of having a 'girlfriend'. I remember that experience well. Mostly I enjoyed it. I even ended up with one or two 'proper' girlfriends (i.e. keepers, good women who gladly hung about with me 24/7 on subsequent visits and chatted with me via email in the meantime, gamely pretending to care about me and mostly not asking for money, at least one of whom I just about fell in love with and sometimes wish was still available ). You know what I mean, lads. Sometimes the girlfriend experience misfired: severe bouts of intoxication more than once led me to light the touch paper on such an arranged relationship only deeply to regret it once the bomb had gone off (and I'd sobered up ). Yup, I've spent some white-knuckled hungover mornings trying to shake off one or two persistent and/or teary late-night rentals: charming exquisite beauties of the night before who'd magically become fat old clapped-out nagging harridans by cold light of day. YOu take the rough with the smooth, I suppose, and, contrary to what Hot Chocolate would have us believe, not every one's a winner, babe. But some are. Yet we hear that this emotionally-useful Thai 'girlfriend experience' is no more? Can this be true? I want and propose to find out during my forthcoming Xmas trip to Bangkok. Now, let's say I have a, ahem, friend coming to BKK with me, and he's lonely and no spring chicken. Let's call him Muff Richardson. Muff's in his early 50s, no film star but not bad to look at, cock and balls in good working order, decent bloke, divorced, affable and occasionally witty, speaks a smidgeon of Thai, popular with bar gals, likes a good drink but mostly behaves himself, staying at Nana Hotel, and his wallet's fairly full, so he's good to go. Let's say old Muff's not a soft touch, but he's not as familiar or jaded with Bangkok as a cynical old cunt like me. Okay. So, if Muff were about to visit Bangkok, let's say over Xmas, and he was looking to partake in the 'girlfriend experience' what would be his best Modus Operandi? Go-gos? Beer bars? Freelancers? Nana? Cowboy? Patpong? Any places with the specific kind of gal that'd be game for the GFE? Recommendations required. All advice greatly appreciated. If we get sorted out, I'll get Muff to post a Trip Report when he gets back. jack
So here it (almost) is, a merry yearly festive interlude approaching and encroaching on our fonder hopes of sensibleness and sobriety like garlands round our rusty chains. Your favourite faithful histrionic scribbler, fall-down drunk, and bare-faced lying bar-room bore Fiery Jack is booked and bright-eyed bound to spend his coming :hubba: yuletide in Bangkok this very year, and he's looking forward to it like a child looks forward to... well ... Christmastime I suppose, which says more about me than about children, trivia fans. Now, of course I've sojourned in LOS over the end-of-year stretch in the past, but that was several wobbly years ago and I'm damned if I can recall that much about it, so here's your chance to do unto Jack as he'd do unto you, and do old Jingling Jacky a favour, lads. Right. What can I expect in terms of weather and wenching, last week of December through first week of January? Business as usual, barfines (thence knickers ) up or down, bars and thoroughfares busier/quieter than normal? Special stuff on? Xmas eve? Xmas day? New Year's Eve? I really am f*cking clueless, so all tips and/or sarcastic comments will be more than welcome. Take your protein pills and put your helmet on. I do. jack