Stickman Posted January 20, 2003 Report Share Posted January 20, 2003 Im curious as to what people who have married a Thai lady in Thailand paid as a dowry - that is *if* they paid a dowry. The fiance an I had a bit of a debate about this last night. While our situation has already been worked out with her mother, she seemed shocked when I told her that of my close friends who married a Thai woman in Thailand, only one paid a dowry. So, did you pay, and if you did (and I hope I am not getting too personal here), how much did you pay? If you didn't pay, why didn't you? I'd be interested to know. Stick Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 20, 2003 Report Share Posted January 20, 2003 Very interesting and relevant post Stick. My lady and I are in the same situation. As far as she is concerned, no problem. We send enough to the family that they don't have any hardships. Hell we're even going to pay off the bank loan (60,000) for the crappy rice land deal they made. However now that she is back on the farm living with mama, the tune may change. My lady is very close to her family and it will be interesting to see the developments. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soongmak Posted January 20, 2003 Report Share Posted January 20, 2003 Hi Stick, IF I marry, I will pay a dowry. The dowry is simply to be on display during the wedding, and will be fully returned to us. I insisted on returning it in full, because if we will marry legally it will be in the netherlands, which will mean that she is entitled to alimony if things will go wrong. Giving a dowry will only double the security and would be unfair to me IMHO. I have to remark here that my GF is an orphan and has only a sister and a brother as next of kin. Dowry will be probably around 200,000 baht and (off course!) a couple of baht in gold that will go to my GF. Off course I am also curious what deal you worked out with your GF! Cheers, soongmak Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 20, 2003 Report Share Posted January 20, 2003 Stick, I did not like the idea of a dowry, however, I wanted to be seen as accepting the Thai wedding norms so I went a new way which was fully accepted by her family. The "dowry" was put into an AUD denominated joint (wife and I) bank account (based in HKG) and the bank book was used on the day of the wedding instead of real cash.....The approx. THB amount was 700,000.... I believe this was a good middle ground of Thai and Farang requirements as I could demonstrate I can look after my new bride, it also gave face to the family and I did not have to pay a traditional dowry..... Additionally, during the "negotiations" of our dowry my wifes cousin was married and her husband paid approx 200,000 THB for the dowry. My wife had the "better credentials" (I hate this "ranking system" but it is an important aspect that should not be completely ignored) and it would have been considered a loss of face for her family had she recieved less....so there was strong pressure from my wife, not family, to beat that.....Since I was going to be in control of the cash I did not mind upping the amount and my wife was grateful for the consideration I gave to this. Additionally, we both work and share our incomes so having a larger than expected (her father did say the dowry was too much) dowry did not bother me at all..... NOTE: I had known my wife for 4 years prior to getting married.....so it was not a flash in the pan type relationship. SB. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
khunsanuk Posted January 20, 2003 Report Share Posted January 20, 2003 Hi, Yes, I did pay a dowry, and I believe you know how much (if not ask, and I'll tell you). Three days after the ceremony the majority of the money was deposited in my wife's bankaccount. Sanuk! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BelgianBoy Posted January 20, 2003 Report Share Posted January 20, 2003 Says Stickman: So, did you pay, and if you did (and I hope I am not getting too personal here), how much did you pay? If you didn't pay, why didn't you? I'd be interested to know. Stick Stick, Not married yet, but already discussed all that Bottom line is no dowry / sinsot to be paid at all....... BTW, she is a nice catholic BKK girl, and it is not customary there to ask a dowry Cheers ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 20, 2003 Report Share Posted January 20, 2003 I put 1000000 Baht during the wedding ceremony. Once the ceremony finished my wife took the entire dowry and gave it back to me in front of everybody. We understand the dowry as a symbolic thing and they got 1MBaht symbol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 20, 2003 Report Share Posted January 20, 2003 Since your wife-in-waiting is a highly educated and a reasonably attractive one (I have seen her with you at a restaurant, from far though ), a 100,000 price tag is probably very reasonable. The price for mine was 100,000, I paid 60,000 and she paid 40,000. The deal was that they kept the dowry money, which, in the end of the day is only cultural and expected, and that they helped me with purchasing a condo. I have checked with a Thai friend and these were the prices I got from him: @ 100,000 for an educated girl with a University degree, not older than 28 and still a virgin. @ 60,000 for an educated girl with a University degree, not older than 28 and no longer a virgin. @ 60,000 for an educated girl with 2 years college (Rajhabat or sumpin), not older than 28, and still a virgin. @ 50,000 for an educated girl with 2 years college (Rajhabat or sumpin), not older than 28 and no longer a virgin. @ 40,000 for a girl with three year high school, not older than 28 years, a virgin and from Isaan. @ 45,000 for a girl with three year high school, not older than 28 years, a virgin and NOT from Isaan. @ 20,000 for an uneducated virgin bargirl from Isaan. @ 30,000 and up for a girl FROM/NOT from Isaan with a fair complexion; the ones ending up as Mia nois (you won't believe how much some of these wealthy Thai-Chinese pay for something that in my view looks everything but attractive, but hey, TiT) @ FREE / Nada for the non-virgin bargirl! Prices do vary from family to family. Lately, the minister of #$#%%$### paid 4,999,9999, almost 5 Million for his bride! Also the beauty, the age, the education of the girl can play a big role in the "price tag" Ooops... dowry. Bud, I suggest you work something out with your wife-in-waiting BEFORE commiting yourself to marriage; lay out a few rules or something... Cheers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dsab Posted January 20, 2003 Report Share Posted January 20, 2003 Good subject, and good to know wht other foreigners have to pay. As I will get married in October, and the preperationas already started, we (me nd my family) just struck a deal with her family myself. My fiancee is absolutely against dowry, because she says she is not for sale. We are not in egypt (paying in camels), and I would not have enough money to pay her anyway. :-) But because the importance to the family, and because the wedding will be quiet a big deal (unfortunately that is what I always wanted to avoid) we agreed that my family and I pay 1.000.000 Baht in cash and 25 Baht in Gold (no clue to how much that will work out in the end - anybody knows ?), but in return we get a newly-built house as a wedding gift from her family, so I would say it is a good investment. :-) Thank god my parents love her, and are willing to invest as well....and the euro is getting stronger and stronger. Still hope we will get the money back as well, but this could be to much of good hopes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zaad Posted January 20, 2003 Report Share Posted January 20, 2003 I did not like the idea of a dowry Me neither. Probably because I had no idea about the existance of it. I think I would have 'paid the price' if asked for, but my mother-in-law didn't ask for a dowry. As her motivation she told me she never liked to idea to receive money from her daughter's husband. She prefered us to keep it for ourselves. So no dowry paid. :: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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