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BUYING A HOUSE


antbears

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Says flyonzewall:

i don't understand the importance guys here place over money....

 

If it's a choice of no girl or no girl AND no money, I'm going with the first option. I kinda like the saying, "Money can't buy happiness, but it makes a helluva down payment." :grinyes:

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fly,

 

Lets suppose you have a retirement pension of $36,000 US per year, a house and no other assets. You get divorced and your wife gets the house and half of your pension leaving you with $18,000 per year for the rest of your life.

 

This is the type of situation many men face.

 

Do you think you would still say "fuck the money"?

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"Lets suppose you have a retirement pension of $36,000 US per year, a house and no other assets. You get divorced and your wife gets the house and half of your pension leaving you with $18,000 per year for the rest of your life."

.................................................................

Is it that bad in the US? Your example, is it based upon wife staying home all the time? From what I have read, male divorcees from the US seem pretty bitter.

 

But is it is a choice to have a wife working at home the whole time, the split seems pretty fair to me.

 

In my country its only old fashioned religious fanatics who follow this pattern during more time than when the kids need it. But in my view, of course a wife deserves some compensation for being at home when kids are brought up.

 

Cheers!

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Often in a US divorce, the male gets the short end of the stick.

 

My brother recently got divorced. He and his wife work in the same company. She has been there longer. They earn about the same amount of money. They have 2 kids. My brother has been in the military reserves for 25 years.

 

The wife got the house. The wife got 50% of my brothers military pension. The wife get child support for the kids. Not the worst I have seen.

 

Trend in the US is for more women to stay home and raise family - at least for early childhood years. This greatly increases exposure for male if there is a divorce.

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Definitely she can get half the pension, at least in New York. Maybe not in Virginia, where I am now. Usually, the house is split. I personally got screwed because I made a Thai-type arrangement when the missus and I bought the house (in her name only, for legal reasons).

 

Depends on the venue/state, though. After my ex got a fairly generous settlement (the whole house, the new car, child support (fair enough) and alimony!!), she sued me a year later to get even more. The new case was heard in Virginia, a rather conservative state. The judge in Virginia (1) cut the amount of child support (I gave the difference directly to my son's bank account, managed by me in trust for him) (2) said I only had to pay child support until my son turned 18, instead of 21 and (3) eliminated alimony/spousal support COMPLETELY!

 

Sue me again, please, dear.

 

You will often hear from both sides that they are worse off financially after the split. I think women say this because they are doing everything they used to have to do, but without $$ from the man. The men generally lose much in assets that were <often> obtained entirely by $$ from their work.

 

While I agree that stay-at-home moms may/should be entitled to a piece of the marriage asset action and child support is due without question, I cannot, for the life of me, understand spousal support. :banghead:

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"Often in a US divorce, the male gets the short end of the stick"

.........................................................

I guess this comes because private pensions are important in the US? Anyway, I don't know shit about this myself. Seems like a tough deal though? I've just noticed that divorced males from US are pretty bitter. Maybe reasons for it?

 

Myself? No own kids involved, but my step sons who I still regard as my kids. I've been lucky, I've avoided the fighting with my Thai ex. We split 60/40 in favour of me on house money, and she got some more of other posessions. Both were happy (kids already self dependant when we split).

 

Cheers!

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>>>In a lot of situations it is the money that causes a relationship to end. Wife gets angry enough and leaves her husband beause she thinks she's bucks up with property when she could have stayed on to work problems out<<<

 

that's what i meant when i said that if it's just money it would help. i would be just feeling a fool for not seeing the true character, and get over with it.

money is made and lost and made again and spent etc.

 

 

>>>Or she mortgages property to finance brothers' scheme to work in Taiwan or to pay off gambling debts and her husband dumps her.<<<

 

well, these things happen, but it depends a lot on your involvement with generall family affairs. i don't know, but a lot of those 'scemes' to work in taiwan etc. fail not due to the scamming character of the person who wants to work, but more due to the lack of education of the person. it is up to you to get knowledge of those things and help than the brother to find a better solution.

that only works though when you have face in the family. and if someone is really out to scam you or your wife than there will be ways to stop that.

it just depends on the level of trust and in the amount of face you have.

 

 

>>>I'm playing devil's advocate here but shit does happen. <<<

 

shit happens, and yes, i have seen more than my fair share of that kind of shit in my years here. but, in most cases i have seen that shit could have been avoided.

 

 

i have more than a few times put my financial future in my missus's hands, and she has never let me down. i have bought land for her, in her name, and she is still with me.

but then, what connects us is more than just sex or a relationship built on materialism. when we met i had nothing, and we have built our lives together, went through a lot together.

 

you know, a lot of people here come with the wrong attitude. they come, refuse to adapt, refuse to learn, think that being a rich westerner means that all that process of learning is not necessary. those people will learn a few tough lessons here.

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> It is part of a large development of about 300 houses. Most are already snapped up by business people and professionals. The company that is selling the land and building the houses is one and the same.

 

Another thing to be aware of: if the builder and the seller are the same company, most likelly they'll be managing the compound for 3 or so years. What happens after that?

 

10km or so before Pattaya, I inspected one of such developments. Large block of land for about 200-300 houses. About 80 of them already built and people live in there.

How much the levies were? Peanuts, something about 30US$ per month or so.

What happens after 3 years? Owners have to set up a corporation and manage the property.

Hell, how much would that cost. I saw about 50-60 people working on the grass and trees trimming, security everywhere, who's going to pay for all that? Or leave it to decay?

 

There was a member, I think ThaiHome was his handle. He gave me an example of a contract between a farang and his Thai wife (in English) that regulates the lease of the land for 30 years. In that contract, the lady owns the land but leases it to a farang husband on 30 years. Anything brought to the land (including a house) belongs to the farang over those 30 years and he can remove his posessions from the land at his will.

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