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western totty


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Pretty boring here in Bangladesh, but the tedium is lifted slightly by some fat arsed flabby thighed bint doing her best to get in my skiddies. Thing is, I'm so used to pork or beef, I'm not to sure how to handle fish or chicken anymore.

We'll be going out for a meal soon. How do I handle the conversation. Do I just sit there, eat and say delicious every couple of moments?

When we get back to the room, and we're in bed, I imagine foreplay will consist of comparing beerguts, double chins and other love handles. If I tell her to smoke, she'll probably ask for a lighter. Showering together is a defo no no - ain't enough room for both of us in there. When I'm showering, should I keep the door open, make sure she don't half inch something? Caressing her naked body will probably take about an hour, and no doubt I'll get stuck in some pile of rolling skin. If I go muff diving, I guess I'll have to tie a railway sleeper to my arse to stop myself falling in. I just hope the phone don't ring when I'm down there - If I come up suddenly for air, I'll bang my head on her gut. After the deed, well my part of it, is over I'll probably roll off, and land on the floor. But what if she wants an orgasm? Wants me to find her G spot? Anyone know any good websites that can help me there? In the morning, should I just give her the bus fare, or do you think she'll want more? Will I have to talk to her in the morning. God forbid, what if she wants to go outside, with me, holding hands? Perish the thought, what if she asks for my phone number.I usually give the number for Darling Massage Parlour or the British High Commission. Should I giver her my real number? Should I ask her name...The questions are endless.

Sod it, I'll save the ball bags for BKK...

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