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chocolat steve

'Never Again' to Falang Women?

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Have you completely ruled out ever marrying a falang woman or at least having a long term monogamous relationship with one under any circumstances? Even if you met a sensible one? Are you completely gone (mentally to LOS that is)?

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i have never been longterm with a farang woman, but i really don't see that much difference in the end.

the few differences do equal each other out. i may get treated like a pasha by my missus, but have on the other hand a much larger burden of responsibilities. one may think that one could escape that by being with an educated women but one will very fast realise that when the novelty has worn off that suddenly there are not many differences than being with a western woman (and a whole lot of other problems will present themselves in due time).

the nagging is the same as i observe it with my friends who are with western women.

 

and who thinks that beauty might be the deciding factor should have a look at reality as well - thai women may appear up to a certain age a lot younger (lets say early 40's), but age then a lot faster than western women.

 

and anyhow, for whom beauty is the deciding factor in a marriage is heading for fast divorce.

 

 

what i basically mean to say is that IMO one who completely disdains western women and thinks that thai women are the answer to one's problems should start taking a very good and honest look at himself. maybe one could find out that the problem is not with the nationality or ethnicy of the women but lies in oneself.

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[color:"red"] there are not many differences than being with a western woman [/color]

 

I am reminded of the movie "Who is afraid of Virginia Wolfe" starring Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton. In one scene, Richard passionately says to Elizabeth, "you have always abused me" and Elizabeth replies, "that's the way you wanted it".

 

As I consider my impending move to LOS and the potential for a relationship with a Thai lady, there is a very big fear. That I will not be able to let go of old habits and will treat the Thai lady in such a way as to elicit the same type of behavior as a Farang lady. Unless I am mistaken, Thai ladies don't act towards Thai men like Farang ladies act towards Farang men. If so, the Thai ladies are adapting to the relationship that the Farang men "expect".

 

Here in the US there is an ethnic group in which the men are totally dominated by the women. I can just picture the man pushing the shopping cart, following a half step behind the woman who is running the show and looking on the man like he is a servant. I can not picture a man from this ethnic group establishing any other relationship with a woman.

 

My only hope is that I have 2 Thai lady friends at the local University who have become my Thai language and Thai custom tutors. They are each graduate students and in the 23 - 25 age range. One will finish her Ph'D in a year and return to her home in BKK. The other will remain in the US. Anyway, they show some signs of wanting to watch out for me, as women with their motherly instincts tend to do. So, I am hoping that I can learn appropriate non-Farang behavior in a relationship from them.

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Hi flyonzewall,

 

I agree with your post , will put :bow:

But I think some people have taking a deep look in to ones self, I know I have ;)

 

I have dated farang women, and found I just wasn't attracted to farang women at all :( I just didn't have any feelings emotionally, very little physical attraction :dunno:

 

So I went with the type of women i'm attracted to, the type of women that makes me weak in the knees, puts butterflies in my stomach, the emotional and physical attraction I'm looking for :grinyes: :grinyes:

 

paulc31 :angel::grinyes:

 

 

 

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>>>>Unless I am mistaken, Thai ladies don't act towards Thai men like Farang ladies act towards Farang men.<<<

 

 

well, yeah... during a barney thai women have a slight tendency towards using nasty ultraviolence :eek:;)

 

 

 

>>>there is a very big fear. That I will not be able to let go of old habits and will treat the Thai lady in such a way as to elicit the same type of behavior as a Farang lady. <<<

 

there might be one advantage here - and that is that one is maybe not under so much (selfimposed?) stress of succeeding, or having to impress the female. which i reckon makes dating easier, or more relaxed. of course that might be outweighted by having to adapt to a completely different culture, and because of that the risk to fall for someone who is more interested in your money than you. or, the other extrem - to become so paranoid/cynic that one starts mistrusting everyone, including the one person who might be the one.

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As a brit by birth, I haven't been in a long term relationship with a british woman since my teenage years, rather asian (non thai) and some scandis and southern europeans.

 

Needed to go back to the UK this last week and it reminded me of what ugly pigs the average british women are. Then, when one is a stunner, her head is usually so far up her own arse that they just aren't worth bothering with.

 

In London, all you need is a Porche to pull and a large fat wallet to keep the girl interested. In reality, its only a different version of P4P but with many more costs along the way.

 

Sure, you don't want to be leaving a BT 1000 on the pillow each morning for the rest of your life but like fuck do you want some cow trying to take 50% of what you've busted your life to achieve.

 

Reminds me of Roppongi's quote: "If it flies, floats or fucks, its cheaper to rent". never a truer word said.

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I am lusting after all women, while Thais are undoubtably hot - I'll fuck any spunky chick regardless of nationality - and while I live here I dont rule out having a farang or two in the future!

 

In fact - just last night as I was leaving Gullivers I exchanged number with a very cute dutch girl!

 

Can't wait for the wife to meet her!

 

JB

 

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Been there done that.

 

The problem for me is that I?m gullible beyond belief, so a dose of paranoid distrust might do me good.

 

At any rate I was never out for a Thai lady in the first place, she just happened to be Thai. I?m not looking specifically for a Thai lady now either. It?s more about personality, and there are nice women everywhere.

 

 

 

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>>>The problem for me is that I?m gullible beyond belief, <<<

 

 

oh, really? ;)

 

 

 

 

not adressed to you now, but just general, another thing which somehow came to my mind in this constant debate of farang women vers. thai women. one thing we should not kid ourselves with - unless our thai wives/girlfriends are from the upper middle or upper classes we do live with the equivalent of what we label in the west in not so nice words "trailer trash" or "council estate birds".

what the vast majority of western men here give as reasons why they do want to be with thai women could also easily be found in the socio economical equivalent of their western counterparts. but i guess that is a bit closed to home compared to some exotic beauty whose language and culture is very foreign, and can be interpreted as something else than it really is.

what i have seen from the more educated women here in thailand i could not find too much difference in attitude and all from a normal western women.

 

so, i would dare say, that if one looks actively for a thai woman as opposed to a western woman is subconciously only looking for a woman of a lower socio economical level. things like the merits physical attraction and the supposed beauty of asian women i would somehow discount in the question of preferred traits in question of marriage.

 

who knows, maybe on some subconcious level i might be also guilty of being intimidated by women of equal educational and socio economical background in terms of relationship, but i do not really want to overanalise the whole thing.

what counts is that i am in love with my missus, it just happened to be that way that i fell in love with a women from the bottom part of the thai society. it could have happened with a woman from any other place, ethnicy or whatever. and as i don't believe in coincidence i reckon it just had to happen that way.

 

i only find it very foolish to somehow praise the merits of thai women and completely discount western women as most of the merits praised are not the merits of "thai culture", but the merits of a women of a lower socio economical background, so nothing really to praise at.

men who do that should IMO bring up the honesty and admit their own insecurities (no problem with that) instead of shifing their own faults on "farang women".

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