What can Western women learn from Thai girls?

[westernwoman]

Hi everyone! Would you like to help western women learn some Thai relationship tactics? I'm a Western woman working on a magazine article in which I'd like to reveal the secret of Thai bar girls. Would appreciate your input. In concrete, specific terms, why are they capable of attaracting men like honey does bees and how come they are able to "wrap men around their little fingers" so well that men often say they would never go back to dating a Westerner? I've known men who propose to a bar girl after a few days of meeting her - in the West, if a girl talks marriage on the second or third date, he's def. too busy to ever meet up again.

What do Thai bar girls do to attract men initially and then, how do they keep the men interested? Is there something you wish women in the west would do too (realistically) or, what do you think they are doing wrong that the thai bar girls are doing right when trying to attract men? You can also email me off the board at thailandstories@gmail.com...would love to get Thai bar girls input as well so if you know of anyone who speaks at least basic english and has access to email and wants to advice her western sisters in attracting men, I would appreciate any contact info. thanks!

[bust]

I've known men who propose to a bar girl after a few days of meeting her -

Maybe you should go and ask them.......

[buddha]

trollin...trollin...trollin....

keep those doggies movin....

RAAAAAWWWWWWHIIIIIIIIDDDDDEEEEEE!!!!!

[passingthru69]

trollin...trollin...trollin....

keep those doggies movin....

RAAAAAWWWWWWHIIIIIIIIDDDDDEEEEEE!!!!!

 

Can we say setup?? From the womans libbers??

I will use my 5th addmendment rights to keep my mouth shut

[Encore]

Dear Westernwoman,

 

It may well be that all the above posts are correct, and you are a Troll. Highly likely, but not certain.

 

A few years ago, a Western woman posted here who was suspecting her husband was caught up with a thai girl, and was asking questions, trying to understand why, trying to find out if she could ever trust them again. (anyone here remember 'Surly'?)

 

(IMHO the answer is NO. Once caught by the Sirens, there is no way back.)

 

Read this board, that should tell you a lot about what attracts western men to Thai girls. And what attracts thai girls to western men.

 

And please post your article once it is finished on this board, too.

[Weird]

I'll bite.

 

Simple. Western women want the whole package. Thai women want security.

 

A western male can better provide for a Thai women (less requirements) and therefore the Thai women puts superior effort into the relationship compared to a western woman. A western woman can act the same as a Thai women in regards to attracting a male, it's just they do it at a very very small top minority of men.

[OCgringo]

umm as they say

"you can't get there from here"

 

OC

[magician]

 

Troll or not, I will post some comments, because they can help throw some light on the subject. I think that it is a good topic.

 

1. There is very little "feminism" in Thailand. It just never happened here. Women naturally defer to men, they are naturally and utterly feminine, and they not only expect a man to act like a man, they are comforted when you do so. I have seen many relationships with Thai girls founder because Western men were too "wishy-washy."

 

I will illustrate with a couple examples.

 

I had a Thai girlfriend for two years. She was, hands down, the best girlfriend that I have ever had, for as long as the relationship lasted.

 

I distinctly remember when I cracked the code on how to interact with her.

 

I asked her one time whether she wanted to go to the movies, or out to dinner. She looked confused. She said "up to you." I told her, "no, up to you." It is utterly normal to give a Western woman the option of making this decision. For Thai girls with experience with farang, they can often handle this, as well. For her, well, she felt as though it put her on the spot. She was uncomfortable. I noticed this, thought about it, and modified my behavior.

 

The next time, I told her "go put your sexy dress on, wear those slutty shoes, and do not wear any underwear. We are going out to dinner. When we come back, I am going to fuck the shit out of you."

 

She smiled, she went and put her hair up, applied make up, she put on that sexy dress and those slutty shoes, we went out and had a wonderful quiet meal, we flirted and teased one another the entire time, and we never made it to the bedroom when we got back. We fucked the holy hell out of each other before she had a chance to remove either the shoes or the skirt.

 

She was humming and singing to herself the next morning, and she was happy. I was happy. Uh, huh. I figured something out that turned out to be very important.

 

She wanted me to tell her what I wanted.

 

This applied to meals, even. She would come to me while I was working, and she would ask "what do you want?" Meaning, what did I want for dinner. If I said, "up to you," she was not happy. If I told her "I want pork chops, with mashed potatoes and asparagus sautéed in butter with garlic," she would smile, go make it, and then she would literally feed me the first bite, and cut my meat for me, when we sat down to eat.

 

This girl did this naturally, without any pretension. It was normal for her, a natural and normal part of taking care of her man. It was part of how she expressed her love for me.

 

No Western woman ever treated me like this. Indeed, I do not think that it is possible for a Western woman to find it within herself to behave this way with a man.

 

2. It took some time for me to understand how she saw the world, and how she saw our relationship. Thai girls who are not Westernized are socialized to please men. If you think about it, it makes sense. They often lack power. They often lack education, and income. They need money to take care of their families. The family, bar none, is the most important thing to a Thai girl. For her to get what she needs and wants, she has to use her skills and her assets. The girls that I have known learned how to be very pleasing to men, in order to get what they wanted and what they needed.

 

The girlfriends that I have had all did this. The girlfriends that I kept were very, very good at it. So good, in fact, that I often indulged them. I learned eventually to draw lines, and to enforce them, and this made them feel secure. Knowing limits was good for them, and it helped us get along much better. But they took such good care of me that it was my pleasure to take care of them, and to take care of their families. A good Thai girl will not push this too hard, or too far. A bad one will exploit the shit out of you.

 

For example, I used to call my girlfriend before I left work, to let her know that I was on my way home. I used to tease her and tell her "tell your Thai boyfriend to untie you. I come home now." She would laugh and say, "I not have Thai boyfriend." I would then say, "ok, tell your lesbian girlfriend that she must untie you now. I come home." She would say, "I not have lesbian girlfriend." We would go on with this, and it was truly funny. What we were doing is reconnecting, and she was getting ready for me to come home.

 

When I walked in the door, dinner was cooking. I could smell it as I walked down the hallway.

 

When I walked in, she met me at the door, she took my briefcase, she helped me out of my shoes and socks (these are typically not worn in a very clean Thai household), and if my shoes needed to be shined, she put them aside for the maid to take care of later.

 

She escorted me to the bedroom, she helped me undress, and she hung up my clothes for me. She put me in a robe, then she went and started a hot shower for me. She came and got me, and helped me into the shower, then the girl would literally get in with me and wash me. I never touched a bar of soap. She did it. She shampooed my hair, she was very gentle, familiar, but thorough, and the entire time, she was telling me about her day, funny stories about the maid, the neighborhood gossip, that sort of thing, lightening my mood. After five minutes with her, I was happy to be home, and I had no inclination to go out whoring around, or drinking, or gambling, or any of those other things that Thai males so often do, making us farang look like such good men.

 

After the shower, she handed me a towel, then she went to put dinner on the table. She always served me first. Indeed, when a Thai girl does not serve you first, that is a hint to you that something is amiss. Whether they do it deliberately or not, it is an indicator. This particular girl would often feed me, with her own hands. She took great pleasure in it, because I truly loved her cooking, and the food that she made for me was an expression of her love for me.

 

No Western woman ever treated me like that, nor do I think that a Western woman ever could. They would consider it somehow "beneath" them to do so. For a Thai girl, it is a natural and normal thing.

 

3. Let's talk about how they look.

 

Thai girls are often small, usually slim, they often have long black hair, and the really good ones have pretty almond-shaped eyes, and I like girls with puffy lips. I also like girls with bright eyes, and dimples. But there are infinite variations, Thai girls are all different, but you can say that there is definitely a prototypical Thai girl, and walking down the street will reveal a dozen really lovely examples in any five minute period.

 

I personally prefer a woman with smaller tits. It is just a preference. Sometimes Thai girls have hips which are too boyish for my taste, but many have very nice figures, and great little asses. I like taller Thai girls, with smooth skin and long limbs. I like them wearing dresses, because dresses accentuate their incredible femininity.

 

Thai society values girls with Chinese features and very white skin. Personally, I sometimes find Khmer features very pretty, particularly black eyes that never seem to end, and pouty mouths. I do not care whether a girl is light or dark, and that means that I can find girls that are attractive to me from a much deeper pool than that preferred by most Thai males.

 

Thai people call farang women chang. This word means "elephant." It is mean, but if you live here long enough, you see the truth in it. Farang women are often much larger, they are often much louder, and there is no doubt that they are much more "me" oriented. I no longer see the vast majority of farang women as sexual objects. I see right through them, right past them. I will choose an Asian girl over a farang girl nearly every time.

 

But this is more than just a matter of appearance. It has to do with how they conduct themselves, and their behavior.

 

Thai girls are socialized to be "shy." This means that they are expected to be quiet, polite, softspoken. If you have ever had a disagreement with a Thai girl, the best way to bring it to an end is to listen to her, try to be fair, and then just make a decision.

 

Then you tell her in a strong, firm voice, "this is my decision, and this is how it is going to be. Now, go get me something to drink. When you are done with that, go get naked and get in bed and wait for me."

 

I shit you not. I have done this multiple times. In each case, the girl shut the hell up, she accepted the decision, she went and got me something to drink, she went and got naked, and she got her ass into the bed, and she waited for me.

 

When I got there, we worked out the remnants of the disagreement, and by the time that she was having her first orgasms, it was in the past.

 

With a Western girl, an argument may never, ever, really end. It can go on, and on, and on. With a Thai girl, you just say "mot lau." That is enough. Finished. And it is.

 

This alone has saved relationships with Thai girls that would have been doomed, had they been Western girls. A Western girl will never accept "mot lau." You can never tell her, "enough. It is finished."

 

Now, you have responsibilities as a man, and they are not trivial. You have to be fair. You have to be strong. You have to be decisive. You have to provide. And you cannot give them too much rope, because Thai girls are often very adept at getting what they want from men. I remember one old girlfriend criticizing herself, "all I can do is take money from men," she said. She was very good at it.

 

So, you have to set limits, and the onus is on YOU to understand THEM. The Western male often has the advantage in terms of age, and income, and education. YOU have to understand her needs, and you need to learn how to make her happy. If you make her happy, believe me, she will take very, very good care of you. You have to be much more a specialist in cross cultural communications than she, though you should not underestimate her. Thai girls are very adept at reading you. Good ones are very adept at helping you relax, and at calming the mood.

 

I have a young Thai girl coming to see me right now, in fact. I give her money to help her with her school costs, her living costs, and for her family. She saves this money. She is quite frugal. She gives her family a set stipend out of her allowance every month. When emergencies arise, I often do not even know about it. She dips into her reserves.

 

She knows that I will take her shopping for shoes, and for clothes. It gives me pleasure to sit while she models them for me, and then to buy the ones that I like. We go to the Huaykwang night market. It is open all night, and the prices are cheap. She likes to spend money wisely, but she is a girl: she likes me to buy her things. I am a man. I like to buy things for her. Simple.

 

When I have had a live-in girlfriend, I gave them a budget for household costs, and let them manage it. I expected them to manage the maid, and the shopping. I was never disappointed.

 

I have had some girls who exercised poor judgement with money. I travel extensively, and one old girlfriend would profligately spend the money that I gave her before I left. This girl did not last. I got rid of her.

 

The good ones saved, and they never let me pay a farang price for anything.

 

Bottom line: once you learn how to get along with Thai girls, it may be impossible to ever go back to farang girls.

 

My current girlfriend is very young, 21 years old. I am 45 years old. I am bringing her along slowly. I take care of her, and I look out for her, and for her future. She knows that I make decisions in her best interest.

 

We get along very well. She is beautiful. She fucks like a little bunny rabbit, and she is a very nice, very presentable girl.

 

I do not know whether this relationship has traction, but it really does not matter. There are others like her, and in this country, an old fat guy like me who is merely comfortable can meet lovely girls far prettier and nicer than any women that I can meet in a Western country.

 

Not sure if this helps, but you can give the women of the West a personal message from me: you are obsolete, and you cannot compete. The only reason that men in the West put up with your bullshit is because they have not been here.

 

Hope that helps?

 

[bust]

Not sure if this helps, but you can give the women of the West a personal message from me: you are obsolete, and you cannot compete. The only reason that men in the West put up with your bullshit is because they have not been here.

 

Hope that helps?

 

 

 

[Dumsoda]

Nice piece.

I have read, but will re read again at least once.

 

I too, like having my beer topped up, like going into the Bathroom and seeing paste already applied to my toothbrush, having a bath run for me.

 

Little things really.......but so so different and so wonderful to experience.

 

I like to recipricate with little surprises....unexpected treats....nothing outrageous or over the top expensive (well...most times)

the returns are priceless

 

Cheers DS