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Anyone From Tennessee


The_Munchmaster

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A gas station owner in Tennesse was trying to increase his sales.

So he put up a sign that read,"Free Sex with Fill-Up."

 

Soon a local redneck pulled in, filled his tank

and asked for his free sex.

 

The owner told him to pick a number from 1 to 10.

If he guessed correctly he would get his free sex.

 

The redneck guessed 8, and the proprietor said,

"You were close. The number was 7.

Sorry. No sex this time."

 

A week later, the same redneck,

along with a buddy,Bubba,pulled in for another fill-up.

Again he asked for his free sex.

 

The proprietor again gave him the same story,

and asked him to guess the correct number.

 

The redneck guessed 2 this time

 

The proprietor said,"Sorry, it was 3.

You were close, but no free sex this time."

 

As they were driving away, the redneck said to Bubba,

"I think that game is rigged and he doesn't really

give away free sex."

 

Bubba replied,"No it ain't, Billy Ray.

It ain't rigged. My wife won twice last week."

 

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"Y'know" said a Scotsman, "I still prefer the pubs back home. In Glasgow there's a wonderful little pub called McTavish's. The landlord goes out of his way for the locals, so much that when you buy 4 drinks, he'll buy the 5th drink for you."

 

"Well", said an Englishman, "at my local, the Red Lion, the bar will buy you your 3rd drink after you buy the first 2."

 

"Ahhhhh, that's nothing to be sure", said the Irishman. "Back home in Dublin, there's Ryan's Bar. Now the moment you set foot in the place, they'll buy you a drink, then another, all the drinks you like. Then, when you've had enough drinks, they'll take you upstairs and see that you get laid. All on the house".

 

The Englishman and the Scot immediately scorned his claims, but he swore every word was true!

 

"Tell me," said the Englishman. "Did this actually happen to you?"

 

"Not to me meself, personally, no," said the Irishman. "But it's happened to me sister."

 

 

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Q: How do you circumcize a hillbilly?

A: Kick his sister in the chin.

 

A hillbilly came running into the store and said to his buddy, "Al, somebody just stole your pickup truck." Al said, "Did you see who it was?" The hillbilly replied, "No, but I got the license number!"

 

 

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