Flashermac Posted October 30, 2007 Report Share Posted October 30, 2007 Nah, we're playing cops and Aussies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Torneyboy Posted October 30, 2007 Report Share Posted October 30, 2007 Oh ..now it makes sense Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mekong Posted November 3, 2007 Report Share Posted November 3, 2007 Hampshire police thought it would be a good idea to advertise on the rear of a bus. Their planning did not take into account the position of the exhaust pipe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bust Posted November 3, 2007 Author Report Share Posted November 3, 2007 Or maybe it did Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MooNoi Posted November 3, 2007 Report Share Posted November 3, 2007 That is fucking funny! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Torneyboy Posted November 3, 2007 Report Share Posted November 3, 2007 Very good Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Munchmaster Posted November 5, 2007 Report Share Posted November 5, 2007 Saturday morning I got up early, put on my long johns, dressed quietly in my all weather gear, made my lunch, locked up the dog, slipped quietly into the garage to load my golf bag into the car, and proceeded to back out into a oriental downpour. There was snow mixed with the rain, and the wind was blowing 50 kph. I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad throughout the day. I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. There I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, 'The weather out there is terrible.' She sleepily replied, 'Can you believe my stupid husband is out playing golf in that?' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Palatkik Posted November 6, 2007 Report Share Posted November 6, 2007 A young jackaroo from outback Queensland goes off to university, but halfway through the semester he foolishly has squandered all of his money. He calls home. "Dad," he says, "you won't believe what modern education is developing. They actually have a program here in Brisbane that will teach our dog Ol' Blue how to talk." "That's amazing!" his Dad says. "How do I get Ol' Blue in that program?" "Just send him down here with $2,000," the young jackaroo says, "I'll get him in the course." So ... his father sends the dog and $2,000. About two-thirds through the semester, the money again runs out. The boy calls home. "So how's Ol' Blue doing, son?" his father wants to know. "Awesome! Dad, he's talking up a storm. But you just won't believe this. They've had such good results with talking, they've begun to teach the animals how to read." "Read?!" exclaims his father. "No kidding! How do we get Ol' Blue in that program?" "Just send $4,500. I'll get him in the class." The money promptly arrives. But our hero has a problem. At the end of the year, his father will find out the dog can neither talk nor read. So he shoots the dog. When he arrives home at the end of the year, his father is all excited. "Where's Ol' Blue? I just can't wait to talk with him, and see him read something!" "Dad," the boy says, "I have some grim news. Yesterday morning, just before we left to drive home, Ol' Blue was in the living room, kicked back in the recliner, reading the Wall Street Journal. Then he suddenly turned to me and asked, 'So, is your daddy still messing around with that little redhead barmaid at the pub?'" The father groans and whispers, "I hope you shot that bastard before he talks to your Mother!" "I sure did, Dad!" "That's my boy!" The kid went on to be a successful lawyer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Torneyboy Posted November 6, 2007 Report Share Posted November 6, 2007 Love those banana benders Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teddy Posted November 6, 2007 Report Share Posted November 6, 2007 An Englishman, Scotsman and Irishman are all playing golf and their wives are acting as their caddy's. At the first hole the englishman's wife trips over and goes arse over tit landing legs akimbo to reveal she has no knickers on. "Good Lord" exclaims the englishman "What is going on here" "Well," says the wife "You don't give me enough housekeeping to get knickers" Full of shame the englishman throws her a £20 note "Get yourself to M&S and get some underwear" At the next hole the irishman's wife trips and exposes her minge. "Begorrah, what the fook" says the oirishman. Again the wife explains she doesn't get enough housekeeping for undergarments. The oirishman throws a tenner at her "Get to C&A for some keks and oi want me change" Inevitably at the next hole the scotsman's wife tumbles over, all beaver showing. "Och for focks sake woman," he yells throwing her his comb "At least tidy yersel up a bit" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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