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The Red Lady and The Jealousy


ChristianTroy

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Looks bad for Red Lady.

What can I possibly add?

 

My wife had this friend (female) who one day found this jealous lover. Whenever my wife and her friend would have a drink somewhere he would find out (phoning 3x/hour) park his car in front of the place and stalk both of them. He would call me to tell me how good He knew my wife, what a good friend he was, how dangerous both women were living etc. He ended up stalking my house when I would be away. I threatened to cut his tires if ever I would see his car in my street.

 

One day he bought land 100kms away and built her a house there, cliaming he would "save" her.

Both became alcoholic, had suicide trials etc etc. A real nightmare. She finally left him, but the stalking went on for months.

 

Good luck.

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CT,

 

First, welcome back.

 

Let's do a quick punter analysis of the situation:

 

a. The Red Lady is a "working girl".

b. The Jealousy is a "customer".

 

Red Lady just needs to increase her fees to a point where The Jealousy is no longer interested, or she receives enough compensation to put up with it all (which sounds possible already since he has been a customer for 2 weeks already).

 

Cheers!

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CT,

 

Glad to see you made it through you health problems and are able to come back and enjoy the kingdom.

 

Some thoughts on your post, since you've put it out for public consumption and asked for 'advice':

 

"I am not sure how to stay out of it any longer as I am being made one of the main figures in this silly play."

 

Just ignore it, it's a Pattaya Passion Play. Punter and prostitute silliness.

 

"The Red Lady is my longest and best friend in Thailand, she is a show girl, one of those you wanna meet because she is one of the jewels, hence that why she is my friend for many years now."

 

Hence what? Why? She is your friend because she is a pretty showgirl?

 

"She was calling me in hospital at least twice a week, even borrowed me a significant amount of money once when I needed it quick and basically never asks for anything in return."

 

It sounds like she does care for you. And she sounds fairly typical of the 'good' ones out there who work in the bar trade and as a pro. There are many good ones around. And they can be good friends.

 

"Dumb Cnut was lucky enough to meet her and can back me up that she doesn't fit the regular bar girl description."

 

What exactly is the 'regular bargirl description'?

 

"From my point of view both of us treasure the friendship and would never risk it for sex,"

 

Understandable, and smart really if you want to retain the friendship. Sex usually will complicate things like this.

 

"also i think we aren't really attracted to each other (never really thought about it)"

 

Yes you did! It was the original attraction as you said earlier. She is a pretty 'jewel' superstar agogo dancer. You thought of it, but instead became friends.

 

"However, me being back in Pattaya seems to be a great deal for her and she seems very happy about it. She is dropping off fresh fruits and stuff at the lobby every morning to make sure i am eating healthy and so on."

 

Which is very Buddhist and a trait I have seen many times from Thai women, bar girls or not they love to be 'mothering'.

 

"Since about 2 weeks she is having this customer, which is basically a really nice guy who doesn't mean to harm people but he seems to have this uncontrollable jealousy that is making her literally miserable."

 

Which she has not solved the problem of because he IS a customer and she IS still seeing him, and she IS still taking his money for her services.

 

"He certainly has a crush on her if he isn't in love already while she told him straight that she is in love with somebody else. She set the record straight and he even told me that. Anywho.. he seems somehow a little bit obsessive with her."

 

So he has become possessive of her? She's a prostitute. If he has as much experience in the LOS as you state this seems at odds with his behaviour. But it can happen to the most experienced punter. Never say never and all that.

 

"I perfectly understand that he has a problem with me, even when I mean to do no harm to them, I am there and she explicitely told me not to back off when i offered it for her peaces sake."

 

Why? Why not just tell her when she is with him not to call you, and to not bring him around when she comes to see you? Simple really. Why does she tell you not to 'back off'. It would solve the problem, or at least diminish it and cause less complications. Why does she see you, pick you up, etc when she is with him? It makes no good sense. YOU should tell her to not come around you when she is with him. She chooses to inflame the situation. You need to tell HER to 'back off'. Tell her NOT to bring her customers around when she visits you.

 

"In fact she is calling me when she is with him,"

 

Stupid, and tell her NOT to do that.

 

"she picks me up with the car when she is on the ride home with him etc.."

 

Stupid, tell her NOT to do that.

 

"I do understand this pisses him off."

 

As it would most guys paying for her services and attention. You are a third wheel and not wanted. WTF does she do that?

 

"They seem to have a little sex problem as he is not able to perform sex with a condom. He told me that as well."

 

WTF would he tell you that? Seems odd to me. Besides many men don't like condoms just for that reason. It's not a medical condition or a sexual 'problem'.

 

"I am the least who would make fun about that because I am sure it has to be frustrating for him and prolly triggers what I am writing next."

 

Hardly a problem. Just pay more and she will likely go sans condom, or at least give him head without a condom to finish the act for him.

 

"He is accusing her of going short time with me, he is accusing her of going short time with customers when she disappears to the backstage area for longer than 10 minutes, he is ranting about the kind of shows she's gotta do and ranting if she sits with another customer for a drink. Since that is nothing new that people react this way, he started to check up on her at her home which for my taste means he is crossing the line. There is a beer bar right where she lives and he is hanging out there for hours."

 

OK, he's a dope. Plenty out there. He is an experienced punter but doesn't know he has to wait in line? Obviously not that experienced, or just an infatuated twat that seems to forget she is a working girl and he has a place in line to wait in for her services.

 

"Okay okay okay loooooong story and many words... i think he is going too far, she thinks he is going too far, she repeatedly told him that nothing is going on between them and that she also leaves in a few days to see her boyfriend in Europe."

 

Ah, so the 'jewel' is more than slightly flawed, CT. Glad I am not her 'boyfriend'.

 

"He got all these in formations, and still he is stalking around her place and since a few days he is trying to make me responsible that not more could happen between them."

 

You have made yourself, and continue to, a convenient scapegoat for him. And, your good friend the 'Pattaya jewel' seems to be even encouraging that. The real question is: why the fuck are you allowing it to happen?

 

"As I said, i think he is a nice guy, doesn't look bad, good job etc.."

 

Plenty of morons and whack jobs look presentable and have decent jobs etc. That is all superficial really.

 

"but he seems to ignore ANYTHING she tells him and it has become very uncomfortable to deal with him even after she told him to back off."

 

Yet she still fucks him for pay? Or has she stopped taking him on as a customer? I'm not clear on that.

 

"How'd you handle this.. as I have decided to stay out of it but he seems to want to pull me into this all the time."

 

He seems to want to pull you into this? More like SHE is keeping you involved and 'into' it. As, it seems, do you yourself.

 

"What's the solution? Talk between 2 Men?"

 

Tell her to stop calling you when she is with him, stop coming around with him, and to stop trying to get you involved in it. It is that simple and there is the/your solution, and it is what YOU should be telling her. What is there to talk about with him (besides his condom problems that is)? Maybe suggest to him a lighter gauge condom?

 

"Banishment from the bar?"

 

For what? Buying her out? Being infatuated with her? Drinking in the bar while you are there? You aren't a customer for the girls as you say. So he is likely spending more in the bar than you are, in ladydrinks, barfines, etc. Just ignore him, or stop going there to drink. It is not as complicated as you are making it. Tell her to only call you and see you when SHE IS NOT WORKING. Like I said, it IS that simple. You are playing into the bargirl Pattaya theatrics. It's a way of life for them, an amusement, a distraction, fun even, for them. You are getting yourself involved for no damned good reason, except maybe because you also enjoy these Pattaya Prostitute Passion Plays, as some have already suggested.

 

Besides, she leaves to join her lucky Euro boyfriend in a few days. Problem solved.

 

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Hmmmmm....

 

allow me to chip in my....two cents worth....

the trip to Europe ????

 

Last time ..."we" met...it was my understanding that the BF...was "American"... so Why ...the trip to Europe...???

 

....and i'm a "Tad" confused....as to where....the 4 kids.....came from...

 

 

Hmmmmmm

 

 

but.....I'm just a DC

 

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she's a whore with children so I and many others with good taste wouldn't even fuck her for free.

 

You seem to be a nice and lovely person. :content:

How do you tell a woman gave birth when she keeps in shape and doesn't have any stretch marks? Are you implying that mothers can't be attractive anymore? Are women with a child humans second class?

 

I always thought when a girl looks hot she is hot.

 

Clearly I must be mistaken' date=' thanx a million for teaching me such a valuable lesson! And my sincerest apologies for being accused to sleep with her. :content: It is really all my fault. How dare I going to the same bar where a random guy is going as well. :content:

 

 

[/quote']

 

Nothing to do with being a lovely person or less human or teaching anyone a lesson. I was just pointing out that it's all in your mind - the "hot" bar girl who is oh-so-different from all the others, your "special" relationship with her, the punter who is acting like no other punter has acted before. All of it is in your mind, your own little make-believe world. You're a fantasist and a drama queen.

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Cent, thanx a lot for the introductory words and for the detailed reply.

 

I am trying to sum it up real quick and clear some things up that I have said because they seem to be misleading and I understand how people would come to stereotypical conclusions.

 

Let me start with the attraction, I met her years ago together with her boyfriend, she was the "sister" of my current girl, we met over dinner on a double date as both of the girls been trying to bring the boys together for a chat. They worked at different places.

 

Regarding the "HENCE"

I was implying that after all these years we are still friends which we wouldn't be if she was just exercising the BG101. She turned out to be genuine friend and this friendship doesn't come with a price tag. A night out is like a night out with you, I would pay in bar one she pays in the next bar, not that she had to, because she wants to and because she can. That I am a man and she is a woman doesn't matter when we are out in fact she is a pretty damn good wing"man" probably the best given her experience.

 

Bottomline, people trying to read things into stuff when there is no reason for it. I am pretty sure she has spent more money on me as i on her, all the car services to the airport or around Thailand, she would never accept the money for the gas from me. In her bar she would drink a corona instead of some mini lady drink that's gone when you just look at it, she drinks the small ones with customers. I hope I was able to establish that between me and her everything is sorted out and the are no reasons to read more into it as there is nothing.

 

I told her not to call me anymore nor to pick me up and when he is in the bar I told her to sit with him. The phone calls she made were before I met the guy, she was genuinely thinking we could be friends like I am with her boyfriend who is embracing and appreciating the situation and doesn't see me as a competition, more as a security guard who watches out for her. Since it was implied... her boyfriend lost everything he had and is no longer able to support her that is why she is taking customers again which is okay for both. I am in steady contact with him.

 

Another thing i should of mentioned is that her customer is basically never in the bar, he comes at closing hours to pick her up, in the last 2 weeks he has been there 3 times and I was only twice around. The one time I wasn't there he was accusing her of all sorts of things which makes me think he is just that in confident that he "yeck yeck" with her for the problems sake, when I am around it is just more comfortable to blame me. He could of pay her barfine for the entire time and his problem would be solved, my suspicion is that HE is the one going short time, flirting around and whatever which would be no problem for nobody

 

The oddness you are referring to is that he is telling anyone about his condom problems, he was telling the bar owner who instantly realized this fella is a potential infection risk for one of his girls.

 

There is no higher payment to give him a bareback treatment, she "probably" did that when she was younger but not anymore.

 

The condom problem was explained to me (from both of them independently) that when he just sees that thing he goes limb. Which certainly is a sexual problem as it has nothing to do with the thickness of the guard it is more of a mental problem.

 

Long story short, she isn't calling me anymore nor trying to drag me into this, it is him who can't let that go what she said about me in the first days. Having said that, the phone calls we had were not casual, she had found one of my former regulars which I thought moved to Faranghausen and she spotted her walking into a club and wanted me to know about it.

 

He is jealous, period. He likes this girl "too mutt" and probably envys what I have with her yada yada, as I said if I am not around he is finding other things to be upset about like she was doing short time backstage since he believes there are short time rooms, calling her a whore for doing a banana blow job show etc... In my opinion this guy got really burned by his wife and needs to adjust again. The most silly thing is that they didn't go home together anymore since the 24th but he is still stalking her place, giving her 10 phone calls a day and sending rude messages, she doesnt pick up the phone nor she answers his messages.

 

I am not being played nor am I causing this, nor is she playing him, and nobody is playing with anybody, he is simply a guy who completely lost it and who keeps on trying when should of walked away a long time ago. This is a really really really weird guy otherwise he wouldn't have made it as a post here.

 

Cheers :content:

 

 

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Wonderlust

I am at peace with your and other people provoking, i seriously have way bigger issues to deal with and I am fine with whatever is said, can't hit a ghost though. As far as the alleged drama provoking behavior of mine goes, this is of course a very biased opinion and for all I know I am having my drama already and I rather appreciate every minute I can be here instead of being tied to a frigging hospital bed and by absolutely meaning that it really doesn't bother me how others are trying to make me look like, because it will not nor will it ever change my appreciation to be able to travel again and "do my thang" :content:

 

However there is a reasonable thing to discuss in your ranting . Putting a label on each and everyone who's hitting the nightlife might be a healthy thing for some people but it is also extremely boring. What is the point of a conversation when you believe to know everything upfront? That might work just fine when you visit LOS it doesn't work when you spend the most of your time there or if you live there. It is a lil bit like Las Vegas, a kick ass city to party and forget your ever days problems, hit the casinos, hit the bars and some strip clubs and leave after a few days, when you live there you can't live like that forever. The same rule applies to LOS, you can't keep on doing what you do as a tourist. At some point you break down your walls, take off the labels from the girls foreheads and try to pick out the tiny golden nuggets from (admittingly) a lot of sand. It is like in Vegas, you need to have a spending limit and emotional spending limit in this case and I know for myself how far I will go, "lub you too mutt" is not working on this side of the screen. For me however it has become way more fun to get to know the girls and in 49 of 50 conversations I move on after the first drink, finding that 1 that is actually different is what makes my punter life more interesting. I am tired of hitting on the hottest piece of ass at Marine because usually it is just a piece of ass (as you correctly imply) and there are so many of them. You sure can disagree with that, I won't judge anyone who's got a different opinion than I. Sex is something I can have here in every moment. I am not in the physical condition either that I could say "everyday is a good day" there are good days and very bad days and especially in those days you can see who is on your side and who is on the side where your wallet is in your pocket.

This experience everyone has to do for themselves and I would lie if I'd say I have only trusted the right people, however in the end you got a handful of people around you that comfort you and vice versa and I wouldn't have met any of them If i kept myself emotional unavailable or for that matter had kept the labels on each an everyone.

From all I know we are all humans and everyone I consider to share my bed with at least deserves my attention and my respect, which is probably unnecessary for the outcome but I like to believe that bonding with a girl for a couple of days is boosting the experience. At least it makes me feel better to believe it and I don't see anything wrong to keep this (most likely) illusion alive. Up To Me :-)and thank god people are different; you, me, her everyone!

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