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I_Love_Farang

Am I gonna find a wonderful person who loves being in relationship?

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My hubby's having an affair and that other girl always on top of his head. He made it hard for me to trust him again. I don't know for sure that he won't have another cheat or indiscretion...all I know is that we wanna move forward and risk that the love we have for each other won't allow that to happen.

 

If he promise to stop all communications with that girl then I ll let it all go and move forward with him together with our kids. But if he ll choose that girl instead of wife and kids so its time for me to move on also right?

 

Yes, I think it might be time to move on. He wont change.

 

The trust is gone. It's very difficult to get it back. Not impossible, just very difficult. Especially if you love/loved him.

 

Alternatives/choices...

 

1. Stay together for the children. Honourable, but you sacrifice your own happiness and when they've grown up, you will be old and unlikely to find a new partner. How much do you value your own happiness?

 

2. Separate. Nasty for all concerned. The children invariably feel to blame, even though they are not. If it's possible to do an amicable separation then go for it. A nasty, drawn out, bitter break up does no one any good.

 

3. Have an open relationship. Stay together as husband and wife, but have sexual partners on the side. Can work for all concerned and for the children, as long as they aren't aware of what's going on. Good for your own ego and happiness too...and you might find Mr right along the way. If you are very hurt, this might be difficult for you to do.

 

Some ideas. Hope they help. You will know what's best for you and your children. Too many variables to make a judgement call on the info you've supplied, so choices it is.

 

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I largely agree with Faustian. But Option 1 I think isn't a good choice. Opion three IMHO would be possible only iyou could emotionally handle it. It may be very hard.

 

I think option two would be probably the best way to go. Hard on the hort term, but getting better with time.

 

That said, i'd need to know more about your situation to be really able to have a solid opinion here, the info you gave here is a bit minimal.

 

Good luck!

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Goodday Gentle Men & Mrs. IloveFarang,

 

for a site like this i would expect to question our own mind

why do we HAVE to be jealous when our partner plays with another lover???????

paid or unpaid dont matter

maybe he can give you more pleasure now as he had new inspiration?

why do we mostly see this things in the negative?

why do we assume the jealousy feeling is a genuine one to fight for?

who put this into our minds/hearts?

as a Woman to a Woman: its your choice to feel hurt, maybe its a sign he needs more inspiration or u need some and so what and yes that might mean u got to give him different input or somebody else will do it

forget bout if there is a willing man to be monogamous and happy

2 people in love can be really great

but NEVER u can give each other ALL your NEEDS fullfilled

advice: take a set of lovers and u will have your Dream Lover

get over the idea that one person will do it ALL for you THE REST OF YOUR LIFE...

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Agree with you totally Topcatta - I have a pretty amazing life as some friends here know - I'd post about it but the irational comments and jelousy wouldn't be worth it.

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Had a relationship like that once...only problem was it only existed in my mind.

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No delusional would be not recognizing it was only in my mind ;)

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