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Patts, BKK, Mnla, AC, Boracay, Cebu P1


doris day

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Sitting at Melbourne Airport about to take off on a trip I’d been planning for months. Flew Air Asia and sure enough they had problems. Boarding took at least an hour. Never seen an airline fuck up the boarding of an airplane before. Air Asia are a special airline however. The plane was new, and although overpriced, I liked the entertainment options. The flight to KL was fine but Air Asia uses the old shit terminal and sure enough the flight from KL to BKK was delayed. Truly sick and tired of Air Asia….although I’ll never get sick of the stewardesses. Yum.

 

Arrive in Thailand very tired as I’d been travelling way too much considering the trip isn’t that long…all the delays and getting on and off planes and all the associated bullshit took their toll I think. I’d spent virtually no time in Pattaya over the many years I’d lived in and travelled to LOS so I decided this trip I would start there and give it a chance as I’d never been a big fan. Bkk is where all my best experiences had been and I was a BKK boy thru and thru.

 

Ecstatic to arrive I had promised myself some celebratory beers on the taxi trip to Pattaya. Met my driver (Booked thru Mr T’s taxi service), nice guy and spoke enough English to get the job done. Told him I would be right back I just needed to buy some beer. Big mistake buying it at the airport…go go bar prices in the airport for beer. 125 baht per small can. I bought two however as I’d promised myself the treat. Took some Ferrero Rocher chocolates out of my bag that my dad had given me and shared them with the taxi driver. I was relieved to finally be starting my holiday.

 

Got to Pattaya in record time…benefit of travelling at about Midnight I guess. Maybe only took 45 minutes from airport. Got to hotel and despite booking ahead there was no room for me. I had booked the following night and not the actual night I was arriving. The way they did their bookings seemed strange to me and as I was exhausted from the travelling. I was in no mood for arguing with the front desk girl so I asked if they had another room available. They did but it was a much more expensive one. O.k but it was about 1am at this time so how about giving me a good price and everything will be ok?…. no fucking chance they said so I told them to stuff their booking and I had to go to the trouble of finding a new hotel at 1am. Took a taxi to the Sunview Place on Soi Buakhow instead. A bit cheaper and I was able to pay per day and check out whenever the fuck I wanted which is exactly what I want in a hotel.

 

Went drinking at various places. Happy, Peppermint, Windmill, Airport to name a few. All were enjoyable. I noticed the amount of young men in these places. When I was first hitting the go go’s six years ago there were scant young men around…I was the movie star as my friend dubbed me because I would get so much attention from the girls. Now it was like the crowd had changed, the punters were getting younger (and I’m not even considered old yet in these circles).

 

In Happy a young guy who dressed like he was from the ‘west side’ was throwing ping pong balls around and surrounding himself with three young lasses. I looked around and I estimate that 80% of the crowd are under thirty and quite a few under 25. This blows me away.

 

The first night was a blur. Lots of drinking and not much interaction. I really am too much of an observer these days. Can’t remember what time it was but I hit the JP Bar. I was surprised it was only a shitty little beer bar I was expecting a large nightclub or something. Started playing pool with a tattooed Thai guy. Normally I wouldn’t have a bar of a Thai guy, especially one as dodgy as this guy, but I was feeling so at peace with the world being away from the stresses of my work that all was good. Two girls started playing next to us and one of them was a tiny little thing who had a cute tight body and a nice smile. I started smiling at her and sure enough I took her back to my hotel. I was pretty hammered at this point so after buying some supplies at the local 711 we hit the ‘loom’. Slept and no sex.

 

Woke up in the morning and went down on her. She looked like the whole experience was excrutiating for her. Her fists clenched and squeezing her eyes shut I wasn’t sure what to make of it. Probably inexperienced I’d say. I didn’t try and have sex with her after that. I didn’t want her to react badly to it and I do have a big un so I figured if she couldn’t handle my tongue….well then. If a girl isn’t into the sex like me I get turned off so I let it go.

 

Tried to get rid of her and I thought I had but when I went downstairs there she was. Damn. Offered her some taxi money but she wanted 1,000 baht. I told her there was no sex so no way was I going to pay. I was on shaky ground because I had not specifically asked for any…although her constant leg jamming shut routine was enough of an indicator in my book. Still I should’ve put the question to her then I would be able to say that she had declined. I wasn’t going to pay and she was obviously trying to get money without services. She had done nothing but lie there so I figured 1,000 baht for sleeping and copping a licking wasn’t fair.

 

I got tired of the argument and decided to put my foot down. I gave the 200 baht for ‘taxi’ and let her know that was as good as it was going to get. I walked off and ate at the Pattaya Beer garden. Clearly I was out of practice. I’m far from a newbie but I felt like a newbie all over again making stupid rookie mistakes that began with buying overpriced beers at the airport.

 

My Pattaya experiences weren’t great. Went into secrets twice and ate and looked around. Secrets is ok. I think venues become favourite places because of the atmosphere more than anything. When people get to know you a place feels like home. I have a place in Bangkok that is the same for me. I’m guessing that’s why people go to Secrets. Saw Larry, he seems higher strung than I imagined. Always on the move in the bar…perhaps hard to get a hold of or perhaps he’s just working hard. I was going to introduce myself but as I said before I’ve become a quiet observer nowadays. I often keep my own company and don’t seek out others as I used to do. It’s probably a shame…I made some good friends in the past from complete strangers.

 

Regrettably I didn’t hit any of the big discos. I rode on Baht buses sometimes sitting on them as they went all the way down second road? And then back down Beach Road. I had been to Pattaya twice before but on briefly, once overnight and that was only for a private party. So it was almost like my first visit. Saw Atlantic Bar and the Soi 1 end for the first time. Just another beer bar really nothing to report there. I did get a massage though. I had read a lot about Standby Massage (Dancewatchers long thread on Pattaya Secrets). The times I went past it though an aggressive ladyboy and absolutelty no good looking girls put me off going inside. Maybe the good ones were busy upstairs…maybe there aren’t any good ones. Searched all along the Sois in that area and finally found one decent looking girl among the hounds.

 

I believe it was called 2gether massage? or something like that. Massage was ok and action that followed was nice. Can’t remember what I paid. I went down on her…she on me. Lots of rubbing and sucking before the inevitable explosion. A pleasant experience. The towels and sheets there were filthy. If it was possible to get an STD from towels this would be the place.

 

Went to Windmill twice. The place is billed as being really debaucherous. Personally I didn’t see what the big deal was about. I saw better shows in Cebu and that is saying something because Cebu is boring as batshit. Naked girls…yeah ok I can see that anywhere these days….a bit of rubbing and licking….yeah I do that in Bangkok at a bar I won’t mention….although I believe that practice has since stopped. Two hello girls there sat with me. I bought them drinks and they would sit on my lap and kiss me. They did this for an hour or so getting up to get more patrons in or get drinks and always coming back to sit on my lap.

 

The next day I went to Soi 6. Went early….maybe 11am. Hardly any girls to be seen. Went to Lisa’s? and there was one girl free who looked alright. We talked a bit but I decided to keep looking. Went back up the Soi and into a bar. Can’t remember the name but there were two girls there and after chatting with them decided to take both of them. They were very happy with this and we had a frenetic 3some. One had a tight little ass…while the other had an ample busom. It was ok…but I still maintain that sex without money is more passionate and satisfying than a paid experience can ever be. It was worth it but again the feeling that my mongering days were behind me and that I was just postponing the inevitable surfaced again. The afternoon quickly melted into night.

 

Hit walking street again. I had planned to go to Ban Chang and the Darkside but its funny how the hours just slip away and you push aside long standing plans. I went to Lolitas. Something I hadn’t done in years. I used to be a massive fan of this place in Bangkok so after a long hiatus I decided to try it again. Picked out a nice looking girl. Went up to the room and she began the swirl technique which seems to be in vogue in Thailand now. I was always fond of the good old fashioned latch on and suck for your life….but things change. I managed to finish but my average experiences were mounting.

 

 

Club Boesche had two girls eating each other out in a spa. I just don’t get off on this shit anymore. I think I’ve become desensitized to it. I think I need more these days. Airport was kinda fun. Yes it’s cramped in there but the different things going on is nice and the outfits are cool. Lots of naked girls here right in your face. I liked the place. Peppermint was good. A bit of naked flesh but it was more than that…the atmosphere was good. No hassles no demands to buy ladydrinks. I just sat and chilled. One girl in here was very nice. Her number was 90 or 90 something. Had plenty of eye contact with her but I had my chance the first night and as usual I just sat and watched. The next night I went in there with the intention of barfing her and some hooty tooty young asian guy and his entourage left with her. She looked stylish and out of place here. Not the usual type for this job you would think. Nice skin, the Thai Chinese look, no tatts that I can recall. Girlfriend material.

 

Went to lollipop and there is a gorgeous young sweetheart in there. Sexy, cute, flawless and as above no tatts or bad manners. Why oh why I didn’t barfine her still amazes me. It was very early when I went in there but I should’ve just taken her with me on my barhopping because you won’t find any better in the whole of Pattaya…and that is the truth. She was outstanding. I actually went home alone that night. Yes I know. Walked everywhere twice over looking for a bolt of lighting to strike and for a higher power to say “barfine this one you bloody great foolâ€Â…..but as I keep saying….I’ve become a passive observer…very unusual for me, I used to be the opposite as I’d find the best girls and having GFE’s often without money changing hands. Now I was walking around like a western girl in Pattaya who realises she really should’ve researched her trip better before getting on the plane. I checked out of my hotel early and got a taxi to Bangkok. Just for the record you can get a taxi to Bangkok for 800 baht if you order it from Sunview Place hotel. That my friends is a bargain.

 

First night in BKK and enjoying happy hour at the Silver Dollar I observed the changes in staff. I’m always sad to see more old friends have disappeared. Few recognise me there now. There is a new mamasan and an American Manager. Not surprisingly they don’t get along. I don’t know why you would have a farang manager there but hey what do I know? A girl working the cashier must be a virgin. A regular there asked for a kiss on the cheek but she was too shy. So he started buying lady drinks for her and the other girls each time playfully demanding a kiss on the cheek. After many drinks she relented and just as she was about to kiss him on the cheek the regular turned and kissed her full on the lips. Now she is wise to him and she won’t kiss him anymore. I started demanding she kiss me on the cheek too just to stir her up but she wasn’t have a bar of it. Sly farangs she must be thinking. I hope she doesn’t change.

 

OK. Here’s the bit I left out. Before coming to Thailand and the Philippines (more on that later) I had chatted online with several girls in the Phils and one in Thailand thinking I would hook up with them. After enough happy hour drinks I think fuck it I will give this girl a call. I’d only talked to her briefly online but she had given her number. I wasn’t expecting her to come out or if she did come out I was expecting a lot of trouble and bullshit hence my reluctance. But alcohol is an amazing thing and I gave her a call. Much to my surprise she answered and we quickly arranged to meet that night. Quick shower and we decided to meet at Kho San Rd in Gullivers. I arrived early and scoped out the place. There was a guy trying too hard to look casual and smiling so hard at the waitresses he looked like a buffoon. No girls sitting on their own she wasn’t here yet. Two girls arrived within seconds of each other. Seeing small pictures on the internet is one thing but seeing a person in real life is another. I guessed the first girl who walked in was her. She was wearing a stylish grey/blue dress. She couldn’t see me because of where she sat. She rang me and I walked over and sat with her. She looked different from the girl in the photo but it was clearly her. She probably looked a little more plain perhaps.

 

We chatted about our jobs and made small talk. She remarked she hadn’t eaten and suggested the Gazebo just around the corner. There was a live band and the place was an open air bar/restaurant on top of a building. We ate a little..she fed me…and drank. I’d been drinking for hours before her so a few more whiskeys and I was smashed. She started getting touchy feely and we got closer. She suggested we kick on. She asked if I knew a place called ‘Climax’. I played dumb and mentally noted the big red flag she had just set off. Off we went. Got there and it had a decent crowd. We started drinking again. I was dishing out money and tips like a two week millionaire…which is a mistake as my holiday was a month. Groping continued in Climax…and I suspect I was ripped off by 1,000 baht or more by the staff there. Didn’t give change or gave the wrong change. Didn’t put two and two together until the next day when I did a post drinking calculation of where the last round of money went before I withdraw some more. Definitely got fucked over in Climax. I don’t normally get that drunk so losing money isn’t usually a problem….in six years in LOS its never happened to me before.

 

Took a taxi to her apartment. Lots of groping in the taxi. Straight off with the clothes and hit the bed. OK, because of the drinking I’d downed 3…..yes that’s right…3 Kamagra’s and I’m still not sure how I didn’t have a heart attack. Perhaps they were duds. I managed to go alright but they didn’t have the effect you’d expect from that kind of dosage. Woke up in the morning surprised I wasn’t really hung-over. Thailand is my elixir…even hangovers are better there. She called in sick to work to stay in bed with me. After another round and her pulling out several vibrators I went back to my hotel. We made another date for that night. I was feeling on top of the world. This girl looked lovely naked. She had a J-Lo ass which is unusual for an Asian girl.

 

If I had written this report as I went then right now you’d be reading about how great it is to date girls nowhere near the bar scene and how sweet they are and how there are tons of these girls around just waiting to meet a ‘nice guy’. I was feeling like I had tapped into something I had only briefly tapped into with my Hi-So gik years before and I’d never been able to recreate since. But, the second date with this girl would shatter all of that….and shatter it hard.

 

I meet her at Siam Paragon. Out the front where all the Christmas decorations are water fountains are. She’s quite late to meet me. We eat at the Sushi restaurant there. I note she has a voucher that gets stamped. I know from what she’s been telling me that she probably too poor to eat there and so my curiosity is tweeked. I make a joke out of it but keep it light. I’m letting her know I wasn’t the first guy who has taken her there and her laughing and lack of denials affirms this…but we both get a good laugh out of it. In reality it’s none of my business and doesn’t matter but years in Thailand has made me very cynical indeed.

 

We walk to Central and take heaps of photos together. We are a nice looking couple and she loves having her picture taken. There are lots of people around taking photos and it’s a nice atmosphere. After walking for ages we sit and she suddenly turns sombre. She mentioned before that she had a test the next day and she would have to leave our date early. I didn’t have a problem with that and I tried to stuff my cynicism deep down that there was another man on the scene. That had been my first instinct. Pretty girl + internet = I’m not the only one. Simple math really.

 

She tells me that she is waiting for a phone call from a married man who often rings her and has sex with her and gives her money to help pay for her studies. You know all that bullshit I mentioned before about lots of lovely girls just waiting to meet a nice man? Scratch it, throw it out, forget it, fuck it off. It was a temporary delusion of my mind. I apologise. Ok so I’m pretty devastated because the more time I spent with this girl the more I liked her. We were having a lot of fun together. Her English is pretty good and she’s got a great sense of humour and fun about her. She gets my deadpan, cynical, dry Aussie humour and she laughs at all my jokes. We smile all the time at each other and we are both very affectionate and touchy with each other. We had seamlessy hit it off from the second we met. It’s been years since that has happened to me…….in fact it only happens to me in Asia.

 

So, I sit there but try and not judge her or act too hastily. I think about simply getting up and saying thanks but I gotta go. After all I don’t need this girl…there are so many more girls and this is only the second night of my holiday. But….it’s hard for me to walk away….so she does it for me. I tell her that we should call it a night regardless of whether he calls or not. She gets cranky and simply walks off. I sit for ten minutes and my heart sinks. I thought I had found something special…..something that was just for me.

 

I go to see my ex-girlfriend. She’s not far off getting married. I usually talk with her for ages but she’s showing me pictures of her and her man and his fancy car and I’m so over women at this point I have to leave. So, I decide to go out and get drunk and just fuck women off altogether. I hit QBar and its gone downhill. Lots of hookers in here…trying not to look like hookers. White women and the usual assortment of sleazy white guys looking to score (yes I know I’m white and I probably look sleazy too). I spot one girl in here that every man would barfine/marry/screw in a heartbeat. She’s a bit taller than most Thai girls, wearing skin tight pants and her body is perfection. I don’t know how much she’s charging but whatever it is it’s cheap to spend the night with a goddess like her. She’s coloured her hair brown but it looks good and she’s got a nice tight bust and a lovely soft face. No hint of the flared pig farmers daughters nostrils. Her skin is lightly brown….she’s a 10….actually she’s probably better than a 10. I would see 3 girls who were 10+’s this trip. I only had sex with one of them unfortunately but that was all my fault. I don’t like a 33% batting average. I can do that in Australia for Christs sake.

 

This is the type of girl that guys are too intimidated to talk to. You tell yourself she’s a hooker and you are a relatively young and good looking guy and SHE’S A FUCKING HOOKER and you still feel a little intimidated. I was angry at women so I didn’t approach her. That was a mistake. A girl like this is the perfect way to forget another girl. I stand and drink and don’t bite when she looks at me. Three guys swirl around her. They all want to move in like a pack of Lions slowly circling their prey. One guy walks away. He’s too scared to even talk to her. Another makes light conversation as he’s getting a drink from the bar. But after he gets his drink he walks away. I know I should move in but my mood is off. I’m pissed off at the world and determined to drink tonight and not think about women. An ugly, sweaty, sleazy looking farang cosies up to her and she responds. The thought of him banging this gorgeous girl make my stomach crawl but she’s a hooker and she’s just another girl. Time to move on.

 

The night blurs as I drink more. I think I end up at Climax again. I don’t really like the place and some dickhead popcorn selling Thai man decides to give me shit because I’m not having fun and dancing like a cockhead or trying to score hookers like the other farang in there. Sorry wanker if I want to have a bad time because I’m stuck on a woman then too bad and fuck off. I could bite on his incessant insults and my mood makes me want to just pop the fuckhead but we all know where that’ll lead so I move to the other side of the room and shortly after I leave. I trawl up Sukhumvit for old times sake and see that the number of street bars has tripled since I was last there and I don’t think it’s for the better. If anyone wants to know where the Nigerians have moved to…they sit just up from Asoke BTS now. They don’t seem to consume much if anything they just hang out there and ‘do business’?. Fuck them and all their bullshit.

 

The next day I look around the Sois pat the Emporium. Something I’ve never done before believe it or not. I look for Tulip but don’t find it. But, just behind the Emporium I see a bunch of other massage places. Directly behind the Emporium is a place called Thong Lor Spa 1 I think. There’s a Thong Lor Spa 2 on Soi 26 a stone throw away as well. I go into TLS1 and it’s a very nice looking place inside. Very very swish and well decorated. There are other massage places next to it as well. I go inside and the Mammasan seems grumpy. Not sure if it’s me or life in general that’s up her nose but I continue. After I look at the massage menu she asks me to select a massage…I chose an hour oily and then she asks for 700 baht up front. Ok I’ve been coming to Thailand way too long not to see a huge red flag at this point but I’m curious and I go along. She then calls the girls out. Maybe a selection of ten girls….all average.

 

I pick one who looks ok from afar. Go up to the room. Have a shower….I have to wash myself. She strips to underwear but no further. Up close she’s very average. She starts an average massage and I notice there is some construction going on next door as the incessant scream of a drill pierces the room. It’s a bit hard to relax honey with that drill noise. We make a joke out of it but it starts to piss me off. After a while she does the old ‘he is asleep’ comment alluding to my penis of course. Yeah hon your average, clothed appearance and the drill aren’t exactly getting me into the mood is how I’d like to respond but….so she talks about what she can do and the price. She wants 1500 baht for full service. I’m not keen on her or the drill so I decline and hightail it out of there. She pulls the ‘we get no salary’ routine and I slip her 100 baht. I hear that ‘we have no salary’ line way too many times during this trip.

 

I then go to Snow White massage on Soi 26. I’d never been there before but I’d read that it was a spin off from Tulip and the service was very good. I go in and select a girl who is cute and diminutive. However, on closer inspection she’s had a baby and sure enough the baby has wreaked havoc with her very young body. It’s a shame because her face is very cute and she’s a real sweetheart. She starts blowing me straight away and she doesn’t hurry at all. I pull her pants down and finger her from behind while she’s blowing me. One of my favourite things to do.

 

Eventually we shower and I finger her some more in the shower. She gives me a thorough scrubbing and then I lie down. I discovered she’s got a serious case of thrush. Fuck me I’m making tons of rookie mistakes on this trip. I’ve become so arrogant and yet so passive. Perhaps I need to relax so badly that I’ve completely switched off as opposed to trips where I had the goal of doing as much as possible and always being ahead of the game. That’s how I used to roll.

 

But, she’s a real sweetie. More head. She then gives me a nice slow massage and after I’m covered in oil she licks my entire body and gives me the rimming of a lifetime. She then gives me more head and slips on a condom. She has trouble getting me in for some reason so she slips the condom off and tries to put me inside of her. Whoa no way. You are a hooker and you have a serious case of thrush?...at least that’s what I hope it is. She then realises I’m not fucking her without a condom so she gives me head again. It’s nice and in time I cum.

 

We rest and she cuddles me. She is a sweet girl. We talk for a while before she asks me if I want to go again. I concur and she gives me more head and I finish in her mouth again. I start thinking about the time. My internal clock tells me that it’s been more than the two hours I requested so despite her wanting a third orgasm from me I shower and leave. Now there is a bit of a scam here. It’s obvious the girls are instructed to keep you there as long as possible because you are charged for going over the time you request…u need to wear a watch in here. However, it’s only an extra 200 baht for the extra half hour and I’m well satisfied so it’s a minor quibble. Total damage was 2,400 baht I believe. Money well spent. I give a small tip to the girl as well.

 

I get into the habit of having breakfast at the Dubliner. It’s about 240 baht for the mini breakfast but there’s nothing mini about it. I’d hate to see the full breakfast. There’s a waitress in there who caught my eye. She’s nothing special to look at…in fact she has the flared nostrils of the pig farmers daughter from Isaan look that I’ve grown to dislike. But she’s got the sashe’ down to a tee. She walks sexily around the floor and she has a tight body and a perky little ass and I find myself distracted from my breakfast.

I return to Snow White. And pick a different girl. She looks like she’s from Lao perhaps as she’s lighter skinned. She’s friendly and hospitable like yesterday’s girl and when she asks if I’d like anal I know I’ve chosen well. She wears a fish net body stocking which isn’t bad but not really my thing. I penetrate her ass twice and she blows me once too. I’m well spent and out within the two hours this time.

 

I eat dinner at Charley Browns which has good Mexican food and I go out drinking again. I decide to go uptown and hit some hi-so places. I start at the Witches Tavern Thong Lor Soi 55 from memory which is meant to be popular with the office crowd but after one drink I realise why there are few punters here. Hold onto your hats gents….I order a Johnnie Walker Red and coke……damage? 267 baht. Yes you read that right. I sipped very slowly and left. There was nothing to look at here anyway. I walk past Muse and a bunch of other places whose names I can’t recall. One place has some serious cars out front. Ferraris, Porsches etc. This is the domain of the mega rich Thais. The sons of Thaksin and his cronies would fit in well here. I get turned off the idea and head back to my ‘element’ where I’m sure to be greeted with more enthusiasm.

 

The rest of the night is blurry. I don’t remember where I went but I do remember going home alone. I don’t know why I was acting this way. I never used to go home alone…even after a good seeing to earlier in the day. I had been in touch with Miss ‘J’ my internet girl who admitted she was fucking a married man by text. I sent her a drunken text at 4am telling her I missed her. The next day she rang me and invited me over again insisting that there would be no sex. I agreed as I wasn’t feeling particularly horny and my desire to see her again was strong. I guess I really wanted to believe that you could find someone special and that this trip I would. I still wonder what my trip would’ve been like if I hadn’t gone to see her.

 

I went to her apartment and I don’t remember the evening but we kissed and cuddled and I was awoken by her rubbing my dick and I mounted her with her ankles well past my ears as she pushed me away as I was apparently finding the end of her love canal with every thrust. We weren’t using condoms and on that previous drunken night I had finished inside her. This time I pulled out before finishing. She then pulled out her favourite appliance and explained she had grown too used to it and needed it to finish with. I didn’t know what to feel but I went down on her while she stuck the end of the vibrator against her clit and finished within a minute or two. Clearly she knows how to please herself. She skips a class at University to sleep in with me. We become inseparable after that. Incidentally J did something that Asian girls do. She claimed that I had taken advantage of her on our first drunken night together. This is ridiculous, she started the touching and groping me first and told me to go with her. But I understand this is her strategy to try and ‘reclaim’ her status as a nice girl who doesn’t sleep around. I understand the game and don’t argue with her much. I’d been through it all before.

 

I spend Christmas day alone as Miss J has to work. I eat and watch the expats come in with their Thai partners. I eat at the Bulls Head and Robin Hood regularly. The Bulls Head has a decent Lunch time weekly day menu. Three courses for 250 baht. It’s often quite good and it’s a quiet place to have a pint and contemplate. Lot’s of drunken text messages to family and mates. BTW – can’t simply put a Thai Sim card into an Aussie iphone, that became a problem. Used global roaming for the first half of my trip and I have a bill that is sickening to look at. Just don’t do it. I usually just buy a Thai sim card but after that didn’t work I got lazy about finding an alternative and that cost me dearly.

 

I leave for the Philippines after a few more days of being with J. I head off with mixed feelings. I know that she will in all likelihood see the married man while I’m away and I’m falling for this girl. I don’t want to leave but I’m booked and I’m looking forward to Boracay for New Years. J told me she wanted to be my girlfriend. We talked about long distance relationships. She said she would wait for me to get back from the Philippines.

 

Philippine Airlines are crap. I get to the airport and the plane is delayed as soon as I get there. Not a good start and I think about all the times I’d read about Filipino time. I would realise it’s actually worse than Thai time. After a shit flight where nothing on my seat worked and one unedible shit meal later I touch down. No problems getting thru the airport in Manilla despite all the bad press. Speak to the airport concierge about taxis and she’s a nice looking ENGLISH SPEAKING girl. That’s a nice change and the accent is cute. No problems with taxi drivers or touts and I’m quietly shocked. I thought the Phils was meant to be worse than Thailand and or Indonesia? In that regard. Nope, Indonesia/Bali is the worst just FYI.

 

The hotel..the Crown Makati I think…. is only a few minutes from the airport. Wow the drive is an eye opener. For those who haven’t travelled to the phils…..it’s a shithole. Manilla is a also a shithole. Unpack, the hotel is nice but the room is a bit small….although the staff are really great. Very helpful and genuine. That’s something I would learn on my trip. The Filipino hospitality is excellent. The best I have seen so far. I walk around and spot some of the places I’d heard about. The place is nondescript. Traffic, slums and shopping malls. No beauty, no culture, no colour….I’m really disappointed. Bangkok and Jakarta shit all over Manilla. I find Greenbelt and after some help stumble across Café Havana. It’s got a great atmosphere and I notice tons of hookers and few punters.

 

I’m in an unfamiliar place so I turn on the confidence and play the role of the arrogant white male tourist and start organising. I initially sit inside and then realise all the action is outside so I instruct a waiter to get me a seat outside and I order a drink and tell him I’m going to order food. I tell him to come and get me when he’s found me a table in the middle of the action. It’s nice to be able to communicate in English. Bang within a minute I’m being shown to a table outside and sure enough I’m planted right in the thick of the action. I order lots of food and Mojitos and cocktails and decide to relax and enjoy. There’s people dancing Salsa inside the music is good and the place buzzes. The waitresses are nice and friendly and I’m betting they will go with customers or at least date them with no problems. I’m feeling pretty happy and start to get drunk and after downing the tiger prawns I look around and spot a girl dancing inside.

From afar she’s fantastic. I go in and decide I will get her attention when I pass her to go to the toilet. As I go to pass her she spots me and grabs me giving me a huge smile. Wow I’m getting a wonderful reception to the Phils. Up close this girl is more than hot. She’s a 12….yes that’s out of ten folks. I go to the CR and my mind is buzzing. I think about what I will say to her on the way back and suddenly she walks past the line for the CR. There’s a large mirror and washbasin outside the CR’s and she decides to check out her butt in front of all the guys in the line. All the guys just stare in wonder at the world’s most beautiful ass and body. I don’t want to lower my value and push up her value and do what the other guys are doing so I make a gesture that her butt is a little big and she doesn’t know how to take it. She leaves and I don’t look at her.

 

I return to my seat and spot a guy moving in on her. Whoa there’s no way I can miss out on this girl. I grab the waitress and tell her to buy a drink for the girl. She goes inside and miss perfect points to me questioning if I was the one who bought it and the waitress confirms it. In a flash she’s at my table. She pulls up a chair….nice, so you are staying a while? nice.........we talk and she explains that the girls here are hookers. I play incredibly dumb and my looks of shock would win me an oscar. She explains she used to be on the game but isn’t anymore. Interesting angle she’s taking but I play along. We go barhopping. It’s a holiday so not a lot is open. We try Familia, the trendiest nightclub around, but it’s closed. She then takes me barhopping on Burgos. I again pretend I don’t know the place. OK this place is shit. Normally it’s probably busier but there was literally no one about and just a few girls around. Drink prices are stupidly high. 300+ pesos for a JW and coke. My girl only ordered cokes so they were 150 pesos (god bless her) but after 3 or 4 of these bars the tab is big. One bar, Rhino?, was the worst girly bar I’ve ever been to. Walk in and both of us got molested by about 4 girls each.

 

They literally wouldn’t leave us alone and started asking for lady drinks and tips as soon as our bums hit the seats. The old we get no salary line comes out…aaaargh I keep hearing that (I don’t really care luv) They were massaging every inch of our bodies (no not there you perverts) and I was trying to be nice because I didn’t want to risk pissing off my girl but I was quickly starting to lose my cool. I told them I would give them a tip if they fucked off and left us alone so we could drink in peace. They took maybe one step back and stared at me.

 

About one minute later the ringleader comes back and reminds me about the tip. If my girl wasn’t there I would’ve lost it but….it’s all about the end game. I asked for the bill and they literally grabbed me. Ok get the bill…700 pesos for two drinks and the most disturbing few minutes of my life. Ok I have 300 pesos change and so I give it to them. Now this wasn’t actually good enough for them. They wanted individual tips so they wanted me to change the change into smaller notes. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? My girl grabs me and says let’s go. Yeah I couldn’t agree with you more you sexy little strumpet.

 

I let her drag me out and we hit a disco. Alas even at this noon hooker disco (is there such a thing these days?) two girls ask if they can sit with us. I know what request will come next….may we have a drink?....go away I say. I’ve had enough. They leave but then a man comes over and starts massaging my neck and before I can shoo him away he cracks my neck so loudly I can hear it over the deafening music. That’s a worry….excuse me sir are you properly qualified?.....I give him a small tip and decide bullshit time is over. I start making out with my girl and we head for a taxi. There’s only one taxi outside and the wanker who opens the door of course wants money for his amazing feat. My girl shoves some money into his hand. The taxi driver wants what would amount to be double the actual price of the fare but I don’t want to appear cheap and I’m eager to get back to the hotel so I don’t argue. If I was in Thailand I would’ve gotten out. Problem solved.

 

Back at the hotel…stupid o’clock and I think we sleep. She has a smoking body. You couldn’t design it. Perfect….no really perfect. Slimmest waist tiny little round butt….no fat…not a shred…..perky supple soft medium breasts….slightly brown skin….long hair down to her butt….sexy dress sense…high heels….shiny black hair…large eyes…..and lips as easily as big as Angelina Jolies but soft as butter. Why isn’t this girl modelling somewhere…she’s stunning. Never come close to seeing anything that looks this good in a G-string. I could’ve kissed her for hours and felt amazing. I awoke and cleaned up a bit and went in for the kill. I ate her out and her pussy was perfect. A slight tuft of her and smooth inny pussy. I ran my hands over for ages just basking in the feel of her skin. Even after a night out she smelt divine. Eventually I mounted her…with ankles past my ears and rammed until I couldn’t hold out.

 

After showering and chatting we headed downstairs. She had brought a change of clothes….ha ha…hmmmm. We get downstairs and we had discussed doing something together and she had said yes but when we got down there she said goodbye and took off. I was expecting her to ask for money and a hefty sum at that. I would’ve paid whatever she asked and booked her for the rest of my trip…..make that the rest of my life. No money exchanged hands and she disappeared out of my life as quickly as she had appeared. It was then I realised that I didn’t have a picture of her. I still regret that and I think I always will. A true 12 had just gotten away.

 

The day was taken up with changing hotels. Not fun. I explored Manilla a little bit during daylight hours but it didn’t improve. It is a shithole. How anyone could any amount of time here is beyond me. Yes obviously the women are amazing but I need more than that. I checked into the Lancaster Hotel which was much further away from Greenbelt than I would’ve liked but there is a bar on top of the hotel that I’d read about. It’s called Toyz bar. Now this is a pretty subdued bar with a few ‘hostesses’. Now I’m openly told that there is no barfine and no funny business they are just there to entertain…or perhaps keep the customers who are staying at the hotel because of a day or two of business company. Now I can’t be certain that these girls would go with you or not but it’s Asia and judging from my friendly reception I think it’s highly likely you if they like you. Just be discreet.

 

There’s a talented lounge singer in here and she starts flirting with me. She stares at me whenever she talks about love in the songs she sings and asks my name and gets me to give her some requests. She looks cute so I stay for a few rounds and buy her a drink. I leave however as I’ve got Miss 12 and Café Havana on my mind. In hindsight this is a mistake. Café Havana is busy again but there’s nothing here to get excited about and obviously no sign of Miss 12. I send Miss 12 a text message but she only gave me her number after I asked and that was after she had initially said goodbye so I knew she wouldn’t respond. I hightailed it back to Toyz but the lounge singer had gone. I observed the ‘hostesses’ flirting and getting touchy feely with a couple of what looked like Filipino guys. It wouldn’t surprise me if these girls did go with customers on the low down.

 

The next day I hung out at Café Havana again and just drank and ate and relaxed. There are no girls here during the day but I wasn’t there for that. That evening I hit AC. I got picked up by the hotel and the poor driver was an hour late. He got stuck in holiday traffic and I had only requested a p/u at the last minute. It didn’t take long to get to AC. I was actually surprised at how the AC looked. It actually looked better than Manilla to me but the place is still a hole. I felt wary pulling in as it resembled the Wild West. I checked into my hotel…Central Park…..and walked out looking for action. I was a total newbie…I couldn’t even find Fields Avenue initially. Went to a bar whose name escapes me at the moment. I was actually quite surprised in the AC. The girls and Mamasans were super-friendly.

 

Hit several bars and there was no sign of the two-step shuffle that was common in Bangkok. Bedrock was good fun, Lost in Asia was ok. After turning the pizza girl down a few times I relented and dug into a mini pizza and it tasted quite good. Saw a few nice ones in here. One caught my eye but she acted cold and indifferent to me. Wow that is the first time in any bar that a girl has basically turned me down. I’m youngish and look good and always have my manners on so I’m really not sure what the issue was there but I didn’t get bothered by it….too many other girls around. Went to Cambodia and made another rookie mistake. Saw a cute little spinner in here. Sexy little number she was but she was a cherry girl. By this stage I was pretty drunk and this girl really did it for me so I barfined her thinking I could get blown and fuck her in the ass. I had read that as long as you don’t bang their pussy then it was all cool. OOOOps.

 

We went barhopping together and went to Dirty Duck. This is where all the action was this nite. Spontaneous nudity and a pumping atmosphere my girl danced sexily for me and I was gearing up for a major explosion. Moved to another bar I can’t remember and we kissed and cuddled and then went back to the hotel. Ok so when you have a naked girl in your bed and the only thing she will do is a crappy handjob life is not so much fun. After an hour of licking her all over and getting worked up I had to cut her free. Went to Carousel next and I had maybe an hour and a half before I had to be at Clark airport so I could catch a flight to Boracay so I had to act fast. Some nice ones in here. Barfined a waitress who was very skinny but had a nice set. Poor choice as she spent half an hour in the shower beforehand and she was back in the shower the second I blew and out the door as fast as her little legs would carry her. She got a 100 pesos tip as she insisted on it and I was too uncaring about the small amount of cash and being late for my flight. The AC is definitely worth exploring again….oh well….off to Boracay…..

 

to be continued....

 

 

 

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Don't normally post, but thought I should do having read all that.

 

Very well written, informative and at times amusing report. So good, I even went to the trouble of posting it to others who don't frequent the board.

 

Thanks for taking the time and trouble in writing it.

 

Cheers. :up:

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