tartempion Posted July 14, 2011 Report Share Posted July 14, 2011 OK, here comes the story: GF's not-so-young youngest brother (he is 30) gets involved with a 15 year young bird, gets her pregnant (surprise-surprise) They don't marry but the girls mother works in Taiwan and builds a house on family land around Nong Bua Lamphu, the brother gets himself into working, running a drink cart with a motorbike I sold to the girls mother. 4 months ago a baby girl gets born. So far so good, both families are happy, the lazy youngest brother who used to do nothing except sleeping on the rice field guarding the buffaloes got a life at last. Thus two weeks ago the brother comes home here to help the family planting rice. He gets informed by the GF's family the mother of his baby got off with the ice delivery boy and there is no one to take care of the 4 month old baby. Thus the brother is back home with the 4 months old, has no clue how to feed and wash a baby (I am exaggerating, but you know what I mean), neither did the mother it seems...) GF's parents are old folks, a sis is too busy running her business. Thus my GF spends her time at the parents home/rice field together with surrounding folks all crazy seeing the little dumped. Thais are crazy when they see a few months old child. So she is considering taking charge of the baby. We have room and money. She talks to the father every day, pushing him to decide his future and that of the baby. She suggests he should seek real work (Taiwan?), save money to buy land, build a house, marry a real woman. In the meantime she (we) would take care of the child, but only if he does whatever is needed to ensure an education for his child and thinks beyond age 15 not her responsibility but his. Indeed, here in the villages too many girls get pregnant around 15, puritan Thailand, no pil, no condom, no brain. So far the baby stays and sleeps at the parents house with the father. I don't mind raising a kid not my own, but do have issues with farangs falling for Thai women with kids from Thai men. Something is amiss with a society where the kids (and the mother) are thrown away in the trash bin that easily and farangs who pick up the trash must have a loose nut in their head. But your opinion might differ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julian2 Posted July 14, 2011 Report Share Posted July 14, 2011 I wouldn't do it, I'm too old at 60+ and my mrs and I are fairly private people at home. She doesn't encourage family to hang around too long, particularly young nieces who would make good baby carers. Think about how much influence a baby would have on your lifestyle, as in you personally. Don't worry about anyone else, you're the one who will be gritting your teeth for the next 20 years if it doesn't work out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
khunsanuk Posted July 14, 2011 Report Share Posted July 14, 2011 Hi, "farangs who pick up the trash must have a loose nut in their head." Why? Do those guys marrying divorced women with kids in the West also have a 'loose nut in their head'. What about women marrying a divorced guy who has some kids from a previous marriage? Find your comment pretty insulting to be honest. Sanuk! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tartempion Posted July 14, 2011 Author Report Share Posted July 14, 2011 Julian, You're probably right. KS, my aversion is composite. I find some aspects of Thai society disgusting. Too many farangs jump with eyes closed into Thai mud pools. There is lack of thinking, lightly said, not unlike sponsoring bar girls. Sure in the West man have "mistresses" or "Mia nois", sure in the West men Marry divorced women and raise their kids as their own (I know a few), Sure in Thailand a few farangs know what they are doing, many don't: that's the difference. They need to think more, but they think less, if they think at all. You might also want to consider most farangs take up BG's, that's not the smartest thing to do, BG's with kids? Increasing the odd's against you. Thus Julian I need to think this over some more, might be better to live my life as I do, without a small kid to raise, not sure yet though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ozpharlap Posted July 14, 2011 Report Share Posted July 14, 2011 You can't save the world, so why bother Helping those who should help themselves just gives them a way out Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
khunsanuk Posted July 14, 2011 Report Share Posted July 14, 2011 Hi, Tartempion, you said "Something is amiss with a society where the kids (and the mother) are thrown away in the trash bin that easily and farangs who pick up the trash must have a loose nut in their head.". That to me implies that you consider every farang marrying a Thai woman who has kids from someone else to be stupid. I find that insulting. My wife had (has) 2 kids from a previous marriage that went sour. We met about 5-6 years after she left her ex and I knew she had the kids before we got married. Are you saying I should have just left her once I found out about the kids? Are you saying I am stupid for having married her? (11+ years btw and still going strong). Furthermore, just because they are dumped as 'trash' most certainly does not mean they ARE trash. I do not disagree with your statement about there being something wrong with the society, but I do disagree with you assigning blame to farangs for marrying woman with kids. Sanuk! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coss Posted July 14, 2011 Report Share Posted July 14, 2011 You can't save the world, so why bother Helping those who should help themselves just gives them a way out And yet there is a school of thought that says that true happiness comes from helping others. That being said, I wouldn't do it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest lazyphil Posted July 14, 2011 Report Share Posted July 14, 2011 i know a guy whos living with a (uk) woman with 4 kids from 4 different men....'shes waspy today' he'll often be heard saying.....he truely sees himself as a social worker and knight in shining armour roled into one!..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redbaron Posted July 14, 2011 Report Share Posted July 14, 2011 (uk) woman with 4 kids from 4 different men sounds like a girl I went out with about 10 years ago... was a great laugh, and knew where all the good bars were (London) 24/7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest lazyphil Posted July 14, 2011 Report Share Posted July 14, 2011 i assure you this woman isn't of this description! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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