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Pattaya Tales


expat

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I thought, for my own amusement and hopefully for some others', that I would write a few stories of things that have happened to me here in the weird place they call Pattaya. Or maybe just this story--who knows?

 

So last night I went out to Windmill ago-go. Many of you know that it's rather raunchy with shows on tables--interactive shows, though I'm the shy type and don't partake like my hero Ikkrang. One girl there is kind of cute to me, so I've given her a tip once or twice and bought her a drink a couple times. She's about 20 or so and built like a brick, but a soft brick at that (I am privileged to enjoy many body types). Her face is cute as a button, and she's fun to chat with. I had seen her a couple nights before for the first time in a few months, but didn't have a chance to talk to her as she was doing the shower show. I gave her a 50 baht tip as I left just because I felt like it.

 

So last night, she was on the platform in front of my bench seat with her fellow dancer (well, that is if you call being a dancer lying down and rubbing and humping on other dancers and having respectable gentlemen eat them out) as I sat down. She immediately cried out joyfully "Peter!" I was very pleased to have such a cute girl seem so happy to see me and I beamed at her. "I'm not Peter," I replied, whereupon she joyfully spat out my real name. Well, now we're talking! She even sort of remembers my name!

 

She came and sat with me after her shift and told me she had gone home in the months she had been gone and that she had missed me a lot while she was home. I beamed at her again and believed her totally and utterly. I mean, why else would she be gone from the bar and what's not to miss about me? I asked her if she wanted a drink or a tip, and the smart girl said "tip!" When I left behind my new love, I gave her a hundred baht tip (the drink would have been 120) and moved on the next bar/adventure.

 

That's all for now from your faithful Pattaya reporter.

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<< "I'm not Peter," I replied, whereupon she joyfully spat out my real name. >>

 

 

Willy? :beer:

 

 

p.s. For years I would ask the dancers if they'd rather have 50 baht or a lady drink. Lady drinks then were usually 90 baht, of with the BG hot 20 baht and the bar kept the rest. They would always opt for the 50 baht. In recent years, however, bar owners have cracked down on that. I've had dancers tell me that if they were caught accepting money instead of a lady drink, they would be fire. Effing bar owners. :(

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Many bars have a drink quota so the girls need to book so many a month in any case. Of course if they are the sort that can hit that easily enough then they are more likely to go for the tip. Bout 2 years back Tilac girls were on 10k baht a month if they hit their targets of 50 drinks and 10 bar fines a month.

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Many bars have a drink quota so the girls need to book so many a month in any case. Of course if they are the sort that can hit that easily enough then they are more likely to go for the tip. Bout 2 years back Tilac girls were on 10k baht a month if they hit their targets of 50 drinks and 10 bar fines a month.

 

Yeah, I never push things one way or the other. Up to them.

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I had a similar thing happen to me, in Darwin Australia, many many moons ago when I was a young lad.

 

I had pulled over a girl for speeding, and I had one rule, if I asked them if they did it and they nodded or their excuse was original and innovative, I would let them off (back then, and I think to this day, up in the Territory there was no quotas, just reasonable expectations). Well, she simply admitted it, and was also polite and courteous, and didn't try the "look at me, ain't I a good sort trick", so, i let her of with just a caution.

 

Well, a few days later I walk into the Parap Hotel and there is a strip show on, it was about lunch time. Anyways, I walk through with some mates (before we were off to go barramundi fishing) and there is this hot looking girl on stage in the throws of undress. Then, out of the blue she yells out, "Greg" and starts waving her arms at me. I give a sheepish smile, a nod and then all eyes divert from the stage back at me, a moment of silence, and then a ll mighty yell, "Greg".

 

She finishes her dance, comes down to stand beside me, still naked with a sarong over her shoulder. A few lads within minutes plonk some beers in front of me, which my mates help me to drink (except the nominated diver).

 

Unfortunately, she had to go back down to Adelaide (apparently they had to fly up the good looking ones, as Darwin had a lack of good sorts back in the early eighties - Asians and half-caste beautiful Aborigines were not in vogue back then).

 

Got her number, but being a dumbass young lad it went through the wash and came out as a mangled clump of paper.

 

Advice, you should go back and have some fun before she disappears again :beer:

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I enjoy your tales, though I'm not quite sure what they're about. You're like the Albert Camus of Pattaya.

 

:)

Why thank you. Camus is my favorite Arsenal player.

 

 

Exy, I hope you and Ikkrang are around 8~12 October, Me and Cosspital would like to meet for a beer or so if you have the time.

That would be great. I should be here, though I need to go back to Farangland for a week sometime in the near future for family business.

 

 

I had a similar thing happen to me, in Darwin Australia, many many moons ago when I was a young lad....nice story snipped out...Got her number, but being a dumbass young lad it went through the wash and came out as a mangled clump of paper.

Murphy's law. :)

 

 

Advice, you should go back and have some fun before she disappears again :beer:

Perhaps, but sometimes the illusion is much better than the reality. You never know.

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>Many of you know that it's rather raunchy with shows on tables--interactive shows, though I'm the shy type and don't partake like my hero Ikkrang<

 

I usually fit the role of 'anti-hero' better.

 

The girls on the table actually always prefer a tip, 100 Bt is a hell of a lot better then their cut of a LD. And you really should give audience participation a go one day, it is a great cure for shyness. I was shy many years ago, until some pingpong girl in a Patpong bar invited me to help her by inserting the pingpongball she had to exert again in a cup. Then graduating to icecubes, which ended up in my drink. From there to a good munch is only a small step.

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