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They Think I'm Stupid


sayjann

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Excellent ! Both in the talent of the singer, but in the message.

 

It amazes me how many farangs seek "love" and comfort in the wrong places, mistakingly confusing paid sex with true affection and committment. And, often, they aren't just newbies. For bar girls, fucking guys becomes as normal and as meaningless as riding a bicycle. How can a seasoned veteran of SEA nightlife think any other way? :banghead: (Yeah, I know: "My girl is different".)

 

HH

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Excellent ! Both in the talent of the singer, but in the message.

 

It amazes me how many farangs seek "love" and comfort in the wrong places, mistakingly confusing paid sex with true affection and committment. And, often, they aren't just newbies. For bar girls, fucking guys becomes as normal and as meaningless as riding a bicycle. How can a seasoned veteran of SEA nightlife think any other way? :banghead: (Yeah, I know: "My girl is different".)

 

HH

 

 

You comment is absolutely spot on and very easy to understand and to follow - until the moment you fall in love with a BG. smirk.gif

 

 

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I dont think its just bargirls - anyone who starts using the 'L' word in the first month has problems, IMO, unless they mean they've fallen in 'lust'. As long as you remember you come somewhere after family, King and Buddha, it should all be cool. :stirthepo

 

I've lived most of my adult life in a perpetual state of lust jumping from fling to fling. P4P or not. I honestly thought P4P would be easy -- a clear cut line of demarcation where you know exactly what you're getting into.

 

But that's not really true is it. You never know when you're going to start copping feelings for someone and other impulses to protect and help kick in.

 

Do people get exploited on that? Oh fuck yes... A LOT. But the lines blur and get messy. And that's the real name of the game.

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I dont think its just bargirls - anyone who starts using the 'L' word in the first month has problems, IMO, unless they mean they've fallen in 'lust'....

 

You could fall in love at first sight. Some women will glow for you. If you find one like that who returns your love. It could be great.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Excellent ! Both in the talent of the singer, but in the message.

 

It amazes me how many farangs seek "love" and comfort in the wrong places, mistakingly confusing paid sex with true affection and committment. And, often, they aren't just newbies. For bar girls, fucking guys becomes as normal and as meaningless as riding a bicycle. How can a seasoned veteran of SEA nightlife think any other way? :banghead: (Yeah, I know: "My girl is different".)

 

HH

 

Whilst you're correct in what you are saying - it's not prudent to fall in love with a bar girl - well that's no revelation! :banghead: What you seem to be asking about (rhetorically perhaps) is why?

 

The reality is that you can't oversimplify such a complex situation. They might be bar girls - but first and foremost - they are human. And no matter what you may think about them they have the same passions, loves, feelings and desires as you or I possess. They're not robots.

 

My personal feeling is that most people generalise (and moralise) on this subject too much - where it really ought to be taken into consideration on a case by case basis. This is where forums such as these can help and where in this case I believe the OP was seeking advice.

 

I'm sure your comment wasn't meant to be unhelpful - but to be blunt it is unhelpful. The OP has given you some information about her that you can interpret and analyse - then from your judgement and experience make a sensible comment. In this context a generalised stereotyped cliche is not helpful.

 

For instance perhaps being 37 and only fairly recently leaving regional Thailand might point towards a lady that would like to meet and settle down with a nice European gentleman? It would certainly seem so to me. I think if Sayjan likes her and thinks about her at lot he should be encouraged - not put down with cliches and :banghead: generalisations. Just my two satang anyway...

 

Panadol.

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Whilst you're correct in what you are saying - it's not prudent to fall in love with a bar girl - well that's no revelation! :banghead: What you seem to be asking about (rhetorically perhaps) is why?

 

The reality is that you can't oversimplify such a complex situation. They might be bar girls - but first and foremost - they are human. And no matter what you may think about them they have the same passions, loves, feelings and desires as you or I possess. They're not robots.

 

My personal feeling is that most people generalise (and moralise) on this subject too much - where it really ought to be taken into consideration on a case by case basis. This is where forums such as these can help and where in this case I believe the OP was seeking advice.

 

I'm sure your comment wasn't meant to be unhelpful - but to be blunt it is unhelpful. The OP has given you some information about her that you can interpret and analyse - then from your judgement and experience make a sensible comment. In this context a generalised stereotyped cliche is not helpful.

 

For instance perhaps being 37 and only fairly recently leaving regional Thailand might point towards a lady that would like to meet and settle down with a nice European gentleman? It would certainly seem so to me. I think if Sayjan likes her and thinks about her at lot he should be encouraged - not put down with cliches and :banghead: generalisations. Just my two satang anyway...

 

Panadol.

 

interesting post.

 

i ramble on about something which i have thought about.

it's a fantasy/pipedream/whim which i have but i know it's not going to happen.

gone are the days where i like to sleep with anything and everything and i have met some ladies over the years who i could easily have settled down with.

but this gal really hit me between the eyes and i DO see something in her.

i take everything she says with a pinch of salt,the only thing i believe is her age/DOB.

 

she tells me tales of losing her virginity at age 32/inexperienced in the ways of the tourist areas/brothers and sisters working as police in BKK/borrowing from a bank and building a house in her city/village and other things.

but other things used to come out in conversation that seem to contradict things she said earlier but has never bothered me,i know they tell you want they think you want to hear.

but i did grow fond of her and do have feelings for her.

she basically came across as a little innocent and not that savvy about many things,but of course that could be an act.

 

she is very experienced in sexual matters despite her self-confessed ignorance of the act.

knows more then she admits to and is certainly more streetwise then she lets on to.

i left phuket in sept and she had e-mailed me twice by the time i got home and has kept in touch 3/4 times a week and even called me on the phone.

she berates me for not contacting her but i wait for her to get in touch and just try and sense the feelings she might have.

she does'nt know when i'm returning to phuket as i want to surprise her and see what happens.

when we were together before i arranged a discount on her nightly/daily rate and she was happy with that.

she knew she would be getting a regular cash sum and often paid her own way.

caused problems with the bar owner but i got away with the arrangement because i have known the owner for many years and we are friends.

 

i think when i return the BF will have increased because of the holiday period but i will resist any effort to scam me.

it will be easy for me to say goodbye and not return to the bar again,her loss not mine as i spend well every day.

but it will mean not seeing my gal and that will be hard for both of us,but as we all know there are plenty more bedwarmers out there.

but i do like her and would have little interest in other women if i'm with her.

not to say that i won't have the odd bit on the side and her and her best friend have agreed to a little 3some which i look forward to as the friend is a total babe.

but it's noy just the sex,in the 12 hights we spent together i only fucked 5 times,it was'nt just for the sex which made me see her everyday.

not to say that i was'nt happy everyday....

we used to like our nights out at various favourite places and i was quite happy to fall in bed and just fall asleep most nights with her in my arms.

but the mornings were different and she never failed to make me happy a couple of times before we finally left the hotel for the day.

 

a while ago i posted about taking her to her hometown for a visit but think it's probably unrealistic.

but the last week or so she has been talking about how much she would like me to go and see her home when i visit her again.

she says she will pay for the return journey and while that would be great to see somewhere and experience new things/sights.

but i can't be doing with 1 to 2 days travelling on a bus and the time would account for over half my holiday.

now it sounds like i'm being the one who's being selfish but it's not for me really.

 

anyway,my ramble is over,just wanted to get a few things off my chest.

i know what i want is a dream but how many of you had had a dream and is it wrong to want something which you know is not going to happen?.

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Had a chuckle at a recent email from a very frustrated fellow who wrote into Stick regarding his lack of success in finding a 'good' girl in various upmarket BKK bars, despite having lived in the city for 6 months. He claimed that the only girls he met were simply a higher class of working girl - better dressed than Lower Suk, but also after more money.

 

I'm not looking for 'lurv' at this point in time, but if I were I definitely wouldnt go looking for it in a bar. Another claimed that every woman he has met through TLL has turned out to be a 'whore' (presumably of the paid variety), so I guess that leaves regular attendance at a temple and volunteering at orphanages - how many Farang are going to do that ?

 

Personally, I'll be happy if I never fall into the clutches of another nutter like Ms CP. Her friends might be drop dead gorgeous, but all of that goes out the window when you have a crazy Thai woman chasing you with a knife.

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as i said a few weeks ago i have little cash and would be happy to move to upcountry thailand and just work the land each day and see what happens.

we might fall out within a week and i get thrown out or we could be together for 30 years,who knows?.

i know i would have to forget most things i have grown up with but that does'nt really bother me.

the drink consumption will decrease by 95% but i would get used to that,as long as i have my cigarettes i would be happy.

just living off the land as much as i could would be a great challenge but one i would like to have a try at.

it would be a great way to live out my days.

sitting on a deckchair watching the sun go down with a beer in hand each night would be a perfect way to finish every day.

 

but like i say just a dream and nothing wrong with dreaming about something you want,even though you know it will never happen.

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