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How Can We (Re-)Activate The Board?


elef

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I've said it before, but I guess talk is cheap - when I'm down to my last few thousand dollars, its time to get serious about the exit strategy. Why jump off a perfectly good highrise when alcohol+pills+bathtub is so much more peaceful ? If Whitney could do it, anyone can.

 

I often cite Blackie as my role model, but it sounds like his last days were pretty grim - I want none of that. The other end of the scale is guys who have swapped a miserable, penny-pinching existence in Farangland for a miserable, baht-pinching existence in Thailand. Screw that - live fast and die disgracefully. Probably wont seem so glamourous when the money runs low, but there is no way I'm coming back to the aged pension in Oz. I dont strut around Patts holding hands with 19-yr olds, but neither will I be shuffling around Carrefour looking for the cheapest noodles .....

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sad isn't it - I met a few last trip who were in that boat, some leeching off relatives and friends, others eeking out a living doing odd jobs, begging/conning - sad life really.

 

And you wonder why I rarely socialise? You just scraped the surface, Red. (I am assuming that you are referring to a small seaside town not a million miles away from where I am typing this!)

 

Usually - but not always - meeting yet another farang fantasist can be a mild diversion and sometimes amusing. I get fond of some of them in the way that I view the street dogs in my soi. As long as they don't try to bite, then I'm just fine.

 

These people are not your friends. Tell them nothing unless you are happy for it to be common knowledge among the Tribe of the Resentful.

 

Never give any indication of how much money you have - or don't have. Their twisted little hierarchy puts a lot of stock by how much money they think you have. A lot - then you are a man to be flattered and courted - you might come in useful. The wisest thing is to say little - preferably nothing - about such matters and then gently divert the discourse.

 

Same with your phone number. Don't give it out willy-nilly or I guarantee that it will cause future awkwardness. A phone is for your convenience - not theirs.

 

Any guy between 50 and 70 who bangs on and on about his Vietnam War experiences as a Tunnel Rat (or similar) was not there. The similar guy who says nothing and rarely drinks in bars and just lives his life quietly - probably was. It's a rough guide but as a rule of thumb I ain't far out.

 

People who say that they are having money 'problems'? Where would they be telling anybody this? 99% of the time they are telling me in a bar. Join the dots. They always find money for drink or weed. Strange that one...

 

The moochers from their relatives? I'll presume you may be referring to the guy with the 'taxi'. I don't give him anymore than the time of day. He's slightly retarded, but he has a very wealthy family back in his homeland and it is cheaper to keep him in Thailand where his habits and proclivities are unlikely to cause them any embarrassment.

 

I would have loved to have walked and talked you through all the negatives when you were here, but you were on holiday and you don't need that shit.

 

Never say 'perhaps' or 'maybe' to someone trying to squeeze you for cash. It took me years to learn this one but its the best piece of advice I can give when dealing with these 'characters'. (Actually, a lack of any character is what marks them out, but you know what I mean.)

 

'Maybe' means there is a slight opening available. All it takes is one more push and it's payday for the freeloader.

 

The answer is 'No'. A completely unequivocal refusal: "No" Of course, then you'll be 'a cunt', because you are supposed to be their 'mate'. It's like a script; a whole choreography of the Dance of Scrounge and I've seen the play, heard the song, and been watching the ballet for years now.

 

Good fences make good neighbours. I nod at my neighbour next door. He nods at me (he's a farang - cool guy) and we understand each other...perfectly.

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I've said it before, but I guess talk is cheap - when I'm down to my last few thousand dollars, its time to get serious about the exit strategy. Why jump off a perfectly good highrise when alcohol+pills+bathtub is so much more peaceful ? If Whitney could do it, anyone can.

 

I often cite Blackie as my role model, but it sounds like his last days were pretty grim - I want none of that. The other end of the scale is guys who have swapped a miserable, penny-pinching existence in Farangland for a miserable, baht-pinching existence in Thailand. Screw that - live fast and die disgracefully. Probably wont seem so glamourous when the money runs low, but there is no way I'm coming back to the aged pension in Oz. I dont strut around Patts holding hands with 19-yr olds, but neither will I be shuffling around Carrefour looking for the cheapest noodles .....

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And you wonder why I rarely socialise? You just scraped the surface, Red. guy) and we understand each other...perfectly.

excellent advise for the newbie expat or retiree in LOS, carew66.

If I hear the language spoken in my home country I will first pretend to be a stranger and speak with another accent. just be cautious about anyone you meet in LOS!

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Usually - but not always - meeting yet another farang fantasist can be a mild diversion and sometimes amusing. I get fond of some of them in the way that I view the street dogs in my soi. As long as they don't try to bite, then I'm just fine.

These people are not your friends.

 

been a while since we had a beer together,if i ever get to your small seaside town i like to think you would share a glass or two......... :xmascheer

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been a while since we had a beer together,if i ever get to your small seaside town i like to think you would share a glass or two......... :xmascheer

 

Sayjann - it would a great pleasure. The honour would be mine, sincerely. (I live a long way from Helltown and Pleasure City but near enough when needs must.)

 

I always appreciate conversations in English despite my apparent disdain for it.

 

You are more than welcome down here.

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excellent advise for the newbie expat or retiree in LOS, carew66.

If I hear the language spoken in my home country I will first pretend to be a stranger and speak with another accent. just be cautious about anyone you meet in LOS!

 

Thank you, Horneytorney. You are very kind.

 

I'm a wee bit of a misanthrope and I get grumpier as I age. What works for me - works for me. I just treat farangs with a longer barge-pole than I would, say. in London.

 

Here though, a friendly face and someone that speaks your language, someone with whom you may share common frames of reference and so on, means that it's easy to get conned. Happened to me a couple of times. Small beer. A few grand that's all.

 

The language thing that you touch upon is an interesting point.

 

Do you remember the story last week about the Canadian teacher getting stabbed (not-fatal) by some muscle Mary in Pattaya? With no reference specifically to that incident - none - it reminded me of the hazards (and I've done it, to my shame) of being in somewhere like Pattaya and just because of living here, speaking 20 words of Thai, knowing the difference between a noodle and a nipple, there is a very real danger of coming across as a 'know all'.

 

A few beers and then chatting to the girls in fucked-up Thai and over-laughing at their shit jokes can wind up some guys who are holiday and they are well capable of getting the arsehole (upset) if somebody starts 'putting on side' (as they used to say) or trying to be flash bastard.

 

I've been that sad fucker. I kick myself just typing this, but I'm not going to lie. In my day it was lads who used to write their names in Thai script on darts scoreboards in Sukhumvit pubs.

 

If I go to Pattaya to meet lads from back home then I am on holiday also. End of. No Thai. No 'I live in Thailand'. None of that bullshit.

 

"How long you stay Thailand?" is not an invitation for me to tell them.

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I love living in a part of town where there is no other Farang within at least a mile in any direction. Plus those few outside of that are working at regular jobs and not leeching. No one bothers me and the Thais are generally respectful, treating me as a curiousity, not someone to try to rip off. People immediately start speaking in Thai to me, not Pidgin English.

 

When I go to the tourist areas, I keep my guard up and only go to places I know. Saves me a world of problems. Folks who live in the tourist ghettos must be daft, but there are plenty of them. I know people who have lived here 15 or 20 years and yet can barely even order a meal in Thai. No desire to learn it either. :hmmm:

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