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F*cking Cow


Coss
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Many could describe me as one who doesn't suffer fools gladly, others might go as far as Misogynist, Bigoted, Arrogant even. I not aware that the term Racist has been directed at me, but I have no doubt someone somewhere may have done so at some point in my life.

 

I'd dispute this last, as I feel I am a Culturist. I don't dislike people for their race, but I do dislike people, mainly for their failings and very often for their culture.

 

Today, I've come to a point wherein I am tired of being the enemy. Save for the posts on this board I conduct myself in life as a reasonable, polite, intelligent and articulate individual. Some who may have met me, may be able to confirm this. And yet when I'm in the Western Wasteland, I am treated with such casual disdain and denigration, that I've had enough. I'm a Middle Aged, White, Plump, Hetero, Male. I'm not evil and I'm not the cause of all that is evil.

 

I relate to you, dear reader, an occurrence today, of small and seemingly insignificant moment. Were it not for the myriad of similar slights I have received in Middle Earth on a daily basis, this would go unnoticed. But cumulatively, the weight of the previous volume of effrontery, has moved me beyond the tolerant and even meek acceptance, that has previously coloured my persona.

 

What happened; I park my car on the street, as many do in my neck of the woods. I was parked between two driveways on the public road with plenty of clearance all round, legal, considerate, normal parking. I was filling the water in the screen washer reservoir. Me standing in front of my car. The driveway ahead of my car issues forth a convertible BMW (top up). The driver's window is lowered and a middle aged bottle blonde woman, berates me for parking where I have, using reasons that devolve on her having difficulty seeing through my car. She was less than polite and used a tone of one who has entitlement. The gist of her attack was apparently, that I should park elsewhere, on the public road, with legal parking all along it.

 

As I was somewhat taken aback initially, by her verbiage, I smiled and said I would move my car. Only when she had gone did I sense a rising tide of injustice. As my ire became more prominent, I thought more and measured the distance to her driveway from my car, three metres or nine feet in the old school. That's certainly not too close. The car was two metres or six feet in the olden rules, from the driveway behind my car. From this driveway, coincidentally, an old man had driven, some few minutes earlier, and he had nodded in greeting as one does to friendly and affable people.

 

So rather than dwell on why it is incumbent for women in NZ, but not in Laos or Thailand, to spend their time denigrating men such as I, I've come to a pass, which once crossed, will not be re-travelled.

 

As I say, despite my posts on this board, in real life I am well behaved, polite and amenable.

 

No longer.

 

I'm going to take on these bitches and poke them with pointed sticks, much as one uses an implement to disturb fire ants without being bitten, I'm going to give these cows something to be inferior about. Mind you, I'll probably get arrested, for being rude to a woman.

 

God knows it's possible. I've had enough of these people, they have every right to their opinions, but I will no longer subjugate mine.

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Australia isn't much different. I knew I had to be far far quieter than I am elsewhere, so I enrolled my daughter in soccer (her team came second, small gloat moment) and she had a team "Manager" who's job was toell us parents where games are, could people volunteer fro ground duty etc.

 

She sent out one of the worst "e-game" schedules I have ever seen. I work in technology and I had NO IDEA how to use this very poorly designed web site. So at the first training, another lady asked me if I knew where the game was. I had no idea, so we approached the "Manager", let's call her Cath.

 

Wisely I let the lady I'm with go first, my wife and daughter behind me.

 

She says to Cath "Cath, I don't know where the game is next week, I can't follow this web site"

 

Neither can I Cath, I add, thinking this is cool, someone else has taken the lead.

 

Cath turns to me, and loudly says,

 

JOHN USE THE WEB SITE IT'S EASY JUST USE AND DONT COME ASKING ME. IF YOU USE THE WEB SITE THERE WILL BE NO PROBLEMS!

 

Cath then storms off,

 

My wife and daughter start laughing (I think Cath hears this but ignores)

 

The lady who asked the questions turns to me and says sorry, she asked the question, why did Cath shoot you?

 

I have no idea, I'm new to Australia, I believe I'm middleaged male and should just shut up for the next 20 years.

 

FUCKING UN BELIEAVBLE

 

Cath and I had a very tense relationship moving forwards.

 

Some ladies in the soccer club I got on well with, others, not so well.

 

The men who sucked up to the ladies, that was sickening.

 

NOW - Interestingly in the Pacific, the islands seem far more like Asia,

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Well, as it happened, I put myself through more torture this morning, I went to the supermarket. I guess subconsciously I was inflicting pain on myself.

 

I tried things like attempting to walk down an aisle unimpeded, only to have trolleys abandoned directly in my path whilst the 'lady' wandered off elsewhere to examine an item on a shelf, coincidentally with plenty of room for a trolley next to it, but no... they had to abandon the trolley in the middle of the aisle.

 

I started to collide with said trolleys, and glare at the miscreant drivers, but after a group of three looked like they were going to round on me, I felt my self preservation instinct kick in.

 

I did manage to clip one cow's arse, as she backed unannounced out of an aisle, I smiled and gave her a faux sincere 'sorry' before beating a retreat as she was looking around for a lynching mob.

 

I'm gonna have to develop more sophisticated methods of guerrilla warfare, perhaps I could drop packs of condoms in their trolleys, shaving cream, that sort of thing...

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further

 

In a recent brain spasm, I decided to get fit, well, try to get fit.

 

So periodically MLG and I go for a walk, often around dusk, there's a route around our neighbourhood that includes views of the harbour etc.

 

It also brings us into contact with heifers of the Pakeha (Kiwis of white descent) kind, who similarly are out for a jog/walk/waddle.

 

I normally ignore them, much as you'd ignore a lamp post you walk around.

 

But now with my new bloody mindedness, I've decided to antagonize them.

 

For those who don't know, MLG is slim and pretty and lithe and sexy, others have described her as being like a model.

 

So when we meet the mobile bovines on their sweat dripping journeys, I now hold MLG's hand and beam a beatific smile at them.

 

What sort of reaction do I get?

 

Scowl, shoot daggers and look away

 

Scowl, shoot daggers and stare into the distance

 

Scowl, shoot daggers and trip and stumble

 

Scowl, shoot daggers and mutter

 

All of the above.

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My Mrs was sent to a study program(me) in Auckland for a month a few years ago. A middle aged Kiwi gal she met there came to Bangkok for liposuction, having her fat gut reduced. The gal really thought she'd then be able to snag a new guy in Middle Earth. But she was still a cow*, by our standards.

 

*cow = any woman under six foot who outweighs me. (I'm six foot, unless I've shrunk a big with age.)

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"snag a new guy in Middle Earth"

 

well they do you know, but there're a lot of blokes what never get to go out of the country, 'cause limited horizons are bred into them.

 

 

Here's a stereotypical bloke

 

3722274.jpg

 

 

 

And what passes for a minor celebrity woman, note the botox.

 

10387942.jpg

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