Torneyboy

Of course he would' date=' because Scots have class. He would step over them, pick up the whisky and, while gazing at their beautiful bodies and deciding what would be the best position with which to pleasure them all at the same time, slowly drink the whisky, savouring every last drop of nectar and comparing it to the juices that would soon be flowing from the wet pussies in front of him, then disrobe and shag them.

 

An Aussie would of course fall flat on his face, in his urgency to get his strides off while still wearing his shoes, and make a right arse of himself.[/quote']

 

Aye, classy lots the Jocks aren't they

 

 

 

 

What a sad sad sorry lot

 

Glad i am Aussie

Maybe ..but he would go for the booze fast and go back for the Sheilas later....

Planning we call it

Excellent

A Scot is the only man on earth who would step over the bodies of a dozen bronzed naked beauties just to get to a glass of whiskey.

I will have heaps during the World Cup

Why do pipers march when they play ?

To get as far away from the noise as possible.

Gee these come out fast ...sick

But funny

"Ah, Kyla, drinking makes you look so bonnie."

"But Donald, I dinna drink!"

"But I do!"

If that was the case, then I can only assume that the Edinburgh jocks were Hearts or Hibs fans going to watch their team play either Rangers or Celtic in Glasgow. What the feck were the English fans doing. Did they support either Hearts or Hibs and if they did, what the feck where they doing living in Edinburgh?

 

Torneyboy has got some explaining to do

Yes never to reply to a munchie joke

Only North of the bridge

Another sane comment ..i can't believe it

Ahhh fuck'em (Britons) anyways, they're no match for Portugal

oh thanks for some words of wisdom...

Oh ..shit ..Munchie come and save me

I hate Scottish jokes anyway

Line 9...."when they board the train'!

So after the conference, the Englishmen decide to copy the Scots on the return trip and save some money. When they get to the station, they buy a single ticket for the return trip. To their astonishment, the Scots don't buy a ticket at all.

see..they where on the train..

Line 5

"they ALL board the train"

How do you disperse an angry Scottish mob?

Nae bother - just take up a collection.

Gee i have had a win...

Three scots and three englishmen are traveling by train to a football match.

At the station, the three englishmen each buy tickets and watch as the three scots buy only a single ticket.

"How are three people going to travel on only one ticket?" asked one of the three Englanders.

"Watch and you'll see," answers one of the Scotsmen.

They all board the train. The Englishmen take their respective seats but all three scotsmen cram into a toilet and close the door behind them. Shortly after the train has departed, the conductor comes around collecting tickets. He knocks on the tolet door and says, "Ticket, please." The door opens just a crack and a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes it and moves on.

The English saw this and agreed it was quite a clever idea. So after the conference, the Englishmen decide to copy the Scots on the return trip and save some money. When they get to the station, they buy a single ticket for the return trip. To their astonishment, the Scots don't buy a ticket at all.

"How are you going to travel without a ticket," asks one perplexed Englishman. "Watch and you'll see," says one of the Scotsmen. When they board the train the three Scots cram into a toilet and the three Scots cram into another one nearby. The train departs. Shortly afterward, one of the Scots leaves his restroom and walks over to the restroom where the Englishmen are hiding. He knocks on the door and says, "Ticket, please."

No..don't hold your breath..

Take your point....just the Tab..1.2million damage is a bit over the top...they could have gone a little easy ..at first anyway..imo

no..they were just out to destroy the stalls and force the owners to relocate..

I'm sure Teddy posted this one some time ago.

 

Q: What's the difference between a Scotsman and a Rolling Stone?

 

A: A Rolling Stone says "hey you, get off of my cloud!", while a Scotsman says "Hey McLeod, get off of my ewe!"

 

I'm sure Teddy posted this one some time ago.

 

Q: What's the difference between a Scotsman and a Rolling Stone?

 

A: A Rolling Stone says "hey you, get off of my cloud!", while a Scotsman says "Hey McLeod, get off of my ewe!"

 

Now that is below the belt!!!

No

And then there was the Scotsman who married a girl born on February 29 so he'd only have to buy her a birthday present every four years.

See!! These are fuuny ..don't have to lampoon us poor Aussies