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Will be in Bangkok soon on business and was thinking of renting a couple of birds for a threesome. I've had loads of threesomes (always me and 2 birds: don't fancy another bloke sniffing round my dirt box, no sir ), mostly with hookers but a couple with a bird I went out with at uni who swung both ways and had some randy female pals of a similar persuasion (especially after they'd all been smoking dope and I'd just rolled back from the pub pished). To be honest, I've never enjoyed a threesome as much as I've enjoyed good sex with just the one bird. It's okay but a bit awkward. My having only one cock is the main drawback, I have always thought upon those occasions. Except the time at uni when I was in bed with two lezzers, when I thought my even having one cock was a drawback as they seemed more interested in mauling each other than paying any attention to me. I gave up in the end and went into the other room and had a wank, I recall, left them to it. In BKK, I had an 'afternoon delight' threesome a few years ago with numbers 27 and 32 from Annie's, rode them both and they went like the clappers, on each other 69-ing it with dildoes flying about and gods know what like two starving ethiopians on a charity aid package while I recomposed myself and had a cold one from the fridge, waiting to get ready for another round. It cost 6,000 baht (about 15,000 yen. Very pleasant indeed; both had tremendous knockers and 32 could've sucked a sausage through a keyhole. Two nights later I shagged number 16, bar-fined and took her long time (4,000 baht = 11,000 yen) and she stayed with me for 2 days. She was lovely. Her name was Thip, and she sent me e-mails after that, at least once a week, begging for money. I replied but never mentioned money. She gave up after a couple of months. I can't remember the names of the other two. Worth every penny. Looking at the website afterwards, I remember thinking I chose shrewdly, considering I was plastered throughout and out of my box on captain reds, as there's certainly a fair few growlers on the menu, and a couple that look like they were once proud owners of a block and tackle. I looked at the website just now, and it looks like they've raised the bar a bit, not so many plumpers with faces like torn shite. Or try Chiang Mai. I did. If she's still above ground, you'll find Pin (not her real name: I can't remember her real name), the manager of the Smiling Monkey boozer Bumrunburi Road, to be very accommodating, especially if you like a bit of "back door" action with an older woman. If you want a threesome, her younger sister Djan (not her real name: her real name's Tan or Tap or something like that) will gladly join in the fun for 500 baht extra (making it 2,500 baht all in, = 6500 yen). Face like a blind cobbler's thumb but great body on the younger one. You can use the upstairs short-time room for 2 hours, no extra charge. When I was at uni I had a threesome with a punk bird from Liverpool callled Sharna and her bisexual overseas-student redhead dopey hippie mate who looked like Suzanne Vega and was from Vancouver. Her name was Renee or something. She had a French surname, pageboy haircut, and massive tits. Sharna was squatting on her face while I was banging her, I recall. That was good. (Oh God, don't know why I suddenly thought of this but I shagged a bird in Scotland once. There was a booze and blaw party in her flat and she dragged me off into her bedroom, started sucking my cock, then we both stripped off and got down to business atop the bed. Halfway through, as she was moaning her head off orgasmically and I was on top banging away like a fiddler's elbow, I heard a noise. Looked up and met, eye to eye, with a young male infant (aged 3 maybe?) standing up in his nearby wooden cot and watching the action with a bemused look on his cherub angel coupon. He was literally about three feet away. The bedside light was on so me and the bird were well spotlit. Hadn't noticed the young feller or the cot in the surrounding darkness when we'd rolled into the room, and she'd said nothing. We were both pished and stoned, like. I lost my stalk and clambered off her. She wanted me to carry on. I told her to piss off. No way. F*ck, that wee kid'll grow up snookered. Poor little sod. ) A mate of mine called Steve Cooper shagged a jap bloke's wife in an otherwise deserted kiddies swing park near Shinjuku one night while the bloke stood and took photos of them banging. He'd met them half an hour earlier in the Shinjuku Dubliners pub. : Anyway, and to reiterate, threesome banging itself can be a bit disappointing, actually. As I say, you've only got the one cock (presumably?). In Thailand it has often ended up with me shagging one bird like billy-o while the other sits on the end of the bed and watches telly and/or fiddles with her phone. And Japan's out of the question. For the amount of brass you'd pay for a threesome with two sack-of-potatoes tarts in Japan, you could have a weekend in Bangkok, lads, and bang as many zestful birds as you fancied. But I'll give it a go. Incoming as we speak. Needs must. jack