Fiery Jack Posted November 13, 2003 Report Share Posted November 13, 2003 Cocktail that fucked Fiery Jack sold for 150 baht The single alcoholic beverage that finally floored long-term alcoholic Fiery Jack at this year's "songkran" drinking session is now sold at Soi 7 Beergarden for 150 baht in Bangkok. The 700ml tequila/pernod/advocaat-based and smokeless-burning parrafin-finished "Cheesy Bell End" was requested to be placed on the regular drinks menu by an inebriated internet-posting elderly "hippie" working in the air industry out of San Francisco who requested anonymity, said Cocktip Windscreenwipa, katoey barman at the sex-tourist and hooker hangout. There were more than 50 drunken sex-tourists queuing to be served the "Bell End" on it's first day of sale, which had been expected since it was a rainy Tuesday morning. :: "It probably fried Fiery Jack's brain first, then his liver," 'Mr' Windscreenwipa said. "He bounced around, struck a tuk-tuk driver on the jaw, crawled up onto the bar counter, farted violently and "followed through" into his bermuda shorts, then began singing an unrequested medley of Sophie Ellis Bextor numbers whilst removing his clothes. He then turned blue and collapsed. Windscreenwipa said Jack's "songkran" bar tab was a record for a Western drinker. The previous high was 14,600 baht, paid over 3 hours at Xmas 2002 for an "open slate" used by Bangkok first-timer, Mr Carew "Like a Kid Let Loose in a Sweetshop, Mate :up:" 66, who also requested anonymity. The Beergarden's owner, Tiptup Ketchupbottal, invented the "Cheesy Bell End" about six months ago for a freelancer ? streetname of 'Pup': prominent goitre, bottom set of dentures missing in action, and a tattoo on her forhead reading "Elvis Lives" ? who was in the process of undergoing alcohol-withdrawal-related seizures and having a crap inside the putrescent shithouse on the beergarden premises. Keith "Smokey" Smallpiece of 16 Burslem Road Squats, Stoke UK , a late recruit to Fiery Jack's gang of ale, vodka and tequila guzzlers, who also requested anonymity, carried a "resting" Jack back to his suite at the Nana Hotel at 4.25PM on April 14, 2003. The cocktail was made at about 4.05. Smokey returned to his seat at the beergarden at 4.51PM. Fiery Jack, still troubled by double-vision, a slight tummy upset and dehydration, followed at 7.10PM to catch the early evening Happy Hour. Story filed: 07:97 Wednesday 32nd November 2001 Have fun, jack Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yehtmae Posted November 14, 2003 Report Share Posted November 14, 2003 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Torneyboy Posted November 14, 2003 Report Share Posted November 14, 2003 Hi FJ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
limbo Posted November 14, 2003 Report Share Posted November 14, 2003 That Cheesy Bell End seems to be some very inspiring stuff Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elef Posted November 14, 2003 Report Share Posted November 14, 2003 Hi Jack, ""He bounced around, struck a tuk-tuk driver on the jaw, crawled up onto the bar counter, farted violently and "followed through" into his bermuda shorts, then began singing an unrequested medley of Sophie Ellis Bextor numbers whilst removing his clothes." All your previous stories give me the impression this is your normal behavior. :: "and collapsed." Seems also normal. "He then turned blue" OK, so this is the secret effect? elef Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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