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A sponsor withdraws


MrX

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Forgive me, if I don?t recall how much of this is invented.

 

 

The next night:

 

 

 

?OK..What?s his name??

 

?I don?t know?

 

?Where is he from??

 

?Don?t know?

 

How old is he?

 

?Old?

 

?How old?.. same same me?

 

?More old?

 

How many times you see him

 

?3,4 I no remember..he come Bangkok little bit?

 

?How many time he telephone??

 

?2,3?

 

?Where you fuck him??

 

?Upstairs?

 

 

 

 

It is difficult; suspending disbelief in a bad movie. No live punter fucks a girl 3or 4 times and offers to sponsor her after only just about a total of two hours together in one of the sad rooms upstairs at the Bar. Between penetrations and ablutions they might even have had 20 minutes left for talk! Neither, I was sure, did she not know his name nor where he was from.

 

He had rung though, the afternoon before demanding to see her that night, angry when she said she was seeing me.

 

?Ok, I sponsor you then? She said he said. Reported brightly, chewing on the fat of his infrequent visits to Thailand. But the age might have been about right for that cunt.

 

 

 

My head was growing fungi clusters in a dewy field. Ok, first time maybe they had fucked upstairs and perhaps the second, but do you really think a third? And then certainly his hotel room and then even long time and longer time too. Now I knew it was he who had taken her to Kanchanburi on Father?s day to stay on a houseboat and why she hadn?t answered any call the Monday after. Why too, her English had become so svelte and she was uncommonly happy. Pieces clunking into place until it was almost satisfying. Then those sudden calls from ?friends? toward the end of our trysts to party elsewhere and having always a little more money than she admitted to. And, so many new clothes with cell phone a trifle lux. Then the clincher; back at the barthe night before she had gone inside to fetch my beer, coming out evidently perturbed and later, walking to the taxi:

 

?You think I have problem you?..I no have problem you?

 

 

I thought of the shoddy poem I wrote, conviction askew, and imaginary eavesdropped on their call the day before:

 

?Why can?t I see you, I am only here one night?

 

?Darling (surely not!)?. But he sponsor already ?I no want see he.. but what can I do?I want see you? chin chin.

 

Perhaps she had even added she didn?t much like me, rather vinegar to the knife. Was this when my rival overtook?

 

 

 

I asked her later on the phone:

 

?He say he love you?? and following customary evasions;

 

?He only say one time? and then with pain in her voice, ?Yesterday he take Wan.. I see him sit bar before?.? But here I could fashion no interest in their travails to come.

 

 

We met at noon the next day under the feint of plain talk. As I neared the gas station behind the Cowboy my head was singing; ?no thieves and liars in my house?, to an obsessive tune, and at the Old Dutch we chose a wrought table outside which was less conspicuous somehow.

 

 

She was consummate, resisting the extraction of any truth heroically, until even I believed her, though suspicion were enough

 

 

 

 

Now I promise I write no more.

 

 

See you

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A thai girl is quick to throw it all away. Or in your face and dare you to do something about it.

 

>>my head was singing; ?no thieves and liars in my house?,<<

 

Are you saying you are finished with her?

 

>>Now I promise I write no more.<<

 

Serious? :: Hope not.

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I had a good imagination when i was with my thai girl that i took out of the scene. After i ended it a year ago, i've found my imagination lacking when it comes to starting a new relationship. Sort of like something in the brain was castrated

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