The immigration queue

[Guest]

Have just read Sickmans weekly.

The usual good read .I enjoyed the bit about the anticipation and excitement you get when you queue up at the immigration desks(the really slow farrang ones)all you wanna do is get the fuck through that ridicously slow group of tired ,usually hungry, and eager sanukers,through to your backage full of UK condoms and video equipment, and make your way to your sanuking destination.

In that 45 minute to 1 hour wait,why not play the spot the sanuker,package tourist,backpacker,and `boys town boy` game!!.

1.The Sanuker-Always easy to recognise,of course because youve seen him every trip you have ever made.Hes slightly older,fatter,and poorer.but hey ,you will be accepting a Singha from him later on tonight!

2.The Package Tourist-Looks lost,always in a couple,very white,dressed in Hawaian shirts,and clutching the the rough guide to Thailand(in German).Also wearing the obligatory leather bag attached to the waist,full to the brim with Deutchmarks or Dollars.

3.The Backpacker-Wearing a purple sarong,plastic sandals,pierced,nose,eyebrows, and tribal tatoos.Dreadlocked hair,copy of The lonely planet(in hebrew)and a smelling of BO...

4.Last but not least the Boys Town Boy....about 100lbs wringing wet,touching 60 years old,big golden earing.Pink trousers made by a tailor in Pattaya.T-shirt with a printed photo of the face of No 25 in `Cockpit a go go`.A grin still induced by the ecstasy he took at Heathrow, and a mobile phone that has just started to ring,with the tune to Gloria Gaynors `I will survive.`

Then again you could do what I alaways do if you get bored....greet the miserable bastard immigration official with the loudest "Sawade Kup" in history and smile cos your in LOS!!!!