Bad day at Hallmark

[cavanami]

Ever wondered what happens when Hallmark writers are having a bad day........

 

So your daughter's a hooker,

and it spoiled your day.

 

Look at the bright side,

 

it's really good pay

 

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

 

I'm so miserable without you

 

it's almost like you're here.

=====================================================

Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.

 

Did you ever find out who the father was?

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Your friends and I wanted to do

 

something special for your birthday.

 

So we're having you put to sleep.

))))))))

My tire was thumping.

I thought it was flat

 

When I looked at the tire...

 

I noticed your cat.

 

Sorry!

~~~~~~~~~~

Heard your wife left you,

How upset you must be.

 

But don't fret about it...

 

She moved in with me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Looking back over the years

 

that we've been together,

 

I can't help but wonder...

 

"What the hell was I thinking?"

~~~~~~~~~

How could two people as beautiful as you

 

Have such an ugly baby?

~~~~~~~~~~~

I've always wanted to have

someone to hold,

 

someone to love.

 

After having met you ..

 

I've changed my mind.

-----------

I must admit, you brought Religion into my life.

 

I never believed in Hell until I met you.

///////////////

As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...

 

That you're not here to ruin it for me.

#######

Congratulations on your promotion.

Before you go...

 

Would you like to take this knife out of my back?

 

You'll probably need it again.

********************

Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!

 

(Available only in Tennessee , Kentucky & West Virginia )

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Happy birthday! You look great for your age.

 

Almost Lifelike!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When we were together,

you always said you'd die for me.

 

Now that we've broken up,

 

I think it's time you kept your promise.

//////////////////

We have been friends for a very long time ..

 

let's say we stop?