Just another day in Thailand

[Guest]

Like every year my wife and myself made our obligate family visit in Isaan. And also like every year a driver incl. minibus was waiting for us to at the Airport in Ubon to bring us out to the country side. Our family lives exactly at the place where the footpath ends and one must change into the canoe.

 

 

 

However, we rented the a.m. car (or did we rent the driver?) for 5 days. And he stayed with us for the whole time.

 

 

 

After arrival and the usual rituals like stowing the beer away we brought with us or pointing out the chicken we like for dinner (which has done his last move 5 minutes later) normally heavy conversation start.

 

 

 

After several beers and Mekong with Water I was so pissed that I asked definitely the wrong question:

 

 

 

?So, guys what you like to do as we have a car here? Go to Sisaket or Burinam? Or even to Ubon? Or is there something else you like to visit??

 

 

 

?Yes, there is a Wat which is very famous, they have very good medicine to treat old peoples pains? said my father in law.

 

?Great, where is it? I asked.

 

?Somewhere around Ubon?

 

?Ok, no big deal? (it?s about a 2 hours ride one way).

 

?Let?s go tomorrow morning?

 

?OK?

 

 

 

The other day:

 

 

 

?Get up, quick, we are leaving!? my wife, already up and dressed.

 

?Are you crazy, it is the middle of the night, I not even heard the cock screaming yet (normally ~5.30am)?!!!

 

?Everybody is waiting?

 

?Who is everybody, and on what are they waiting?

 

?Did you forget we are going to visit the Wat?

 

?No, I did not, what is the time??

 

?3.30 am.?

 

?Jesus!!!?

 

?Get up now, get up?

 

 

 

As I heard several voices grumble down stairs, I figured that there is no point to proceed this discussion even I was pissed and could not figure the reason to leave already at this time in the morning. However, I would find out later the day. So I get up and dressed.

 

 

 

Downstairs the next nice surprise:

 

 

 

?Listen, we just have a minibus designed to transport 11 people. What the hack do all these people want?? I asked, still quite annoyed about the time all this takes place.

 

?No, worries these are just some neighbors who also have their health problems and therefore want to join?

 

 

 

So they started to pack the minibus. It is amazing how many people find a place in such a car if you really try. At the end, we were 15 grown-ups plus 2 babies leaving to Ubon. All right a drive of 2 hours, I will survive without problems even it is very tight and certainly not very comfortable to travel this way.

 

 

 

5.40 am: gosh, we reached Ubon and the car stopped at a market place to buy the obligate give aways for the monks. This done, everybody back into the car and off to the Wat. After another hour of driving in southern direction I figured it would be a good idea to ask the driver directly where we are going and how far it will be.

 

 

 

?Ohh, just another 40 kilo?s??

 

?Alai??

 

?Kilometer not kilogram, ha, ha?

 

?In other words another hour considering the condition of the road, right??

 

?Yes, I think?

 

 

 

For once, in fact I get an accurate answer. One hour later we left the ?highway? and turned left on a road which could have been good enough to test a Hummer but certainly not for something like a standard car. Unfortunately my first assumption should proof to be correct just about 500 meter later. A tree blocked the ?road?. Hmmm, is this good news or bad news I thought for myself.

 

 

 

?All young guys out? the driver said, which was directed to two guys from the neighborhood and myself. Young under this circumstances meant everybody who can walk without needing a stick.

 

?We cannot move the tree, therefore you have to lead me around it, through the bushes over there?.

 

?Really, your car will get damaged, this is not a Jeep but a regular minibus? I said.

 

?No, problem?

 

?Ok, it is your car not mine, please just remember what I said later on?

 

 

 

So we started to remove bushes and let the minibus through the ?forest? around the tree. After another 25 minutes we were done and ready to move on. Besides I was sweating like a pig and two fingers were bleeding we just left a part of the front spoiler and some car varnish behind us.

 

 

 

Another 20 minutes later, driving over a really bad road (I thought at least three times this is not going to fly) we met a monk working at the side of the road. Great!!! It cannot be far anymore. He joined us in the car. Ahhhhhh, one more!!! So my wife took place on my legs for the next 10 minutes drive. All right, just several bruises more on my legs and my wife hit her head just twice.

 

 

 

?If this is not going to be the most stunning Wat I have ever seen, somebody is going to pay? I thought to myself while walking up the hill for another 35 minutes.

 

 

 

8.10 am, yeap, we reached the Wat after almost 5 hours traveling. Now I figured why we had to leave so early.

 

 

 

BUT:

 

 

 

?Where is the Wat??

 

?Here, don?t you see the statuettes??

 

?Yes, but this is just a cave in the middle of nowhere, and where are the monks anyway??

 

?Ohh, the guy who showed us the way is the only monk here, he lives here alone since 35 years?

 

?Why do you know this??

 

?Because he is famous?

 

?Why did you make me believe that this Wat is close to Ubon?

 

?Because I thought you would not come with us if I tell you, and it is close to Ubon at least closer then to Burinam?

 

?Right (this after more then a decade of marriage) this is really nice!!!?

 

?But see, I know you?

 

 

 

Yeap, how can you disagree this logic.

 

 

 

However, we settled down, prepared the food we brought with us (no gifts like I had to realize) and entered into some very interesting discussions with the monk which turned out to be a real nice and humorous guy (at least for the parts I could follow the discussion).

 

 

 

I asked the monk: ?What are you doing down at the road??

 

?Ohh, I will improve the road the way that more people can visit me?

 

?Sure, I believe it would be a good idea to remove the tree first, right at beginning of the road?

 

?Yes, I know, but see, I have not the right tools to do this?

 

?Hmm, all you need is a good saw and time I figure?

 

 

 

This was the moment my wife started to push my back, so I stopped. I guessed at the end of the day he rather prefers to stay alone but I will never find out. However, like said above he was very nice and prepared two bags full of different leaves and other stuff, the elderly people shall cook and make kind of a tea out of it. This will help to relive them from their pains. ?Yeap, if it help?s this was worth the visit (this I truly believe).?

 

 

 

2.00 pm. time to go ?home?. So, we made us on our way back. After we passed the tree again the driver came up to me and said:

 

 

 

?Sorry I cannot bring you back, I believe the spring-suspension is broken, but I will bring you to Ubon and fix the car and you maybe must wait several hours in Ubon?

 

?Excuse me...? I smiled. Rule number one in Thailand before you really freak out smile and walk away.

 

So I said to my wife:

 

?Listen, you tell him now that I do not care, as long this car is moving he brings us back home or organizes a new car immediately. I do not care. It was not my idea to drive over such a road with an over packed minibus but his bloody ambition to proof something.?

 

 

 

My wife translated this into the appropriate Thai style of saying such things and off we were. After a couple of phone calls it was clear that in Ubon an other driver incl. a new, even bigger van will take us over. And guess what, this worked, at least on the first sight, like it would have been organized by a Swiss Watchmaker.

 

 

 

~4.45pm back in Ubon. I got the promise from the company owner that we will get a new driver and a new car who will bring us back home. And the ?old? driver would catch up with us the other morning again. Great.

 

 

 

As a last service today the ?old? driver drove us up to the market so we could do some commissions some of the elderly ladies wished to do. All out of the car. I just organized a can of Chang beer which I intended to drink in the car while waiting for the ?ladies? and the new car.

 

 

 

?Where for gods sake is he??

 

?I don?t know?

 

?Darling, better somebody is going to know immediately.........my whole stuff is in this car, tickets, credit card, passport everything which is important, I thought he is waiting for the other car so we can move everything?.

 

 

 

Of course this was my fault, normally I never leave this bag out of sight (except it is in a safe) but shit happens.

 

 

 

Again 20 minutes later no new car in sight. Therefore my wife and me walked back to the place I discussed earlier with the boss of the company.

 

 

 

?Where is the new car and even more important for the moment, where is the ?old? car??

 

?Mai pen rai.?

 

?You bastard, don?t ?mai pen rai? me when some guy I hardly know is on the road with my passport and my credit card, forget about the tickets? I thought.

 

 

 

Lucky I am, my wife realized what is going to happen and took over the discussion. I did not say anything anymore. However, 40 minutes later we had everything back, a new car and driver and the ?old? driver showed up the next morning already at 7 am.

 

 

 

So what can I say, great Thailand. Always good for a day full of remembrances. How you can imagine already the next day we laughed about it a lot.

 

 

 

Cheers