another man utd joke

[sfcfan]

A plane was about to crash and there were 5 people on board and only 4

 

parachutes.

 

 

 

The first person said. " I am Roy Keane, one of the best footballers in

 

Ireland. I am worth a lot of money and my fans need me so I think I

 

should be saved." The others agreed and gave him one of the parachutes

 

and off he went.

 

 

 

The second person said "I am Gerry Adams, a radical Irish politician who

 

can really help my country and I think I should be saved." The others

 

said."o.k." and gave him a parachute.

 

 

 

The third person said "I am David Beckham, captain of the English

 

National squad. I have a wife and 2 sons. Everyone knows I am a really

 

nice guy and everyone thinks I am stupid, but I'm not,

 

so I am taking a parachute." and off he went.

 

 

 

There were two folk left, the Pope and a 10 year old schoolgirl. The Pope

 

said, "child I am old and frail and have lived my life while you are young

 

with everything before you. You take the parachute and I will stay with

 

the aircraft and take my chance"

 

 

 

"It's o.k.." said the girl, "there are still two parachutes. David

 

Beckham picked up my school bag."

 

 

 

i liked that one - thought id share it with u all

 

 

 

kevin

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Zaad]

Good one.

 

 

 

Do you have more?

[frogpatrol]

Brill!

[sayjann]

sssssssoooooooo old.

 

 

 

can we have some priginal ones please?.

[ALHOLK]

Hi!

 

 

 

This one also exists as a Micro Shaft joke.

 

 

 

The three remaining people are Bill Gates, the pope and a backpacker.

 

 

 

Bill Gates says - "I'm the most intelligent man in the world. My death would be devastating to humanity."

 

 

 

And yes, you guessed it. The backpackers line is - "It's OK, we still have two shutes as the world's most intelligent man just jumped with my backpack."

 

 

 

returned

 

 

 

ALHOLK

 

 

[ultras67]

ok so here is another joke - its from a few years back but still valid since I have updated the names

 

 

 

God, Alec Ferguson and Arsene Wenger are in fishing boat. God says " i'm hungry, i think i will get some chicken" he steps out of the boat and walks on the water to shore. Wenger looks on in amazement. Later Ferguson says "im thirsty I think I will go and get some coke" he steps out of the boat and walks on the water to shore. Wenger looks on even more astonished. Later still, Wenger is thinking, I am as good as them I must be able to walk on water as well. He says " i am bored, I will go and buy a newspaper" he steps out of the boat and drowns.

 

 

 

God turns to Fergie and says " did you not tell him about the stepping stones?" "What stepping stones?" says Fergie