What Did These Things Mean??

[zanemay]

 

I?m back in Pattaya after 9 days with Joop in Issan. 6 days were in Kalasin with three trips to her Moo Ban (village) 10 km out of town. Things were great (I?ll write more about that in a trip report) and now I?m in a ?kittung mak? mood. (missing her a lot)

 

She is one of those girls that many of you have met - the kind that brings the sunshine with her. When she smiles, laughs and talks everyone loves her. She?s a joy to be around.

 

Anyway...here I sit - spoiled. I was already ?off? the working girls in Pattaya before I spent this time with Joop. Now I?m really off of them.

 

Okay! Okay! I?m feeling mushy as hell, so let?s get to some dirt! You can?t spent that much time with a girl and have everything be perfect.

 

She?s a little baby, okay? If she doesn?t get her way (sometimes) she clouds up (in kind of a sweet way, damnit). The smile goes away for awhile. And she can?t walk anywhere - in three minutes she?s begging for a samlow. She?s hell on a motorbike, too - we?re riding along, her cell phone rings, she tries to answer but can?t because she has on a helmet, so she takes off the helmet while riding, and uses callback. She makes inappropriate U-turns and wrong-ways way too much. (There were remarks from other riders.) She?s a remote control hog who doesn?t care if Zane ever watches another snippet of English-language TV in his life. And, oh, yeah...she asked me to buy her a gold bracelet! The little slut!

 

(Notice I had no complaint about sex. She wasn?t very experienced, but a quick and willing study who enjoyed her lessons.)

 

Let?s talk about the bracelet. When I think about it, it fits in with everything else. This little girl is very proud of her popularity and loves to show off, which is the reason I?m here in the first place. This is a sweet young girl, not someone who was ?working? me like a bar girl. After a few days into this trip she asked me very nicely if I might buy her a gold bracelet. She was thrilled when I said I would. I?ve bought a few gold things in Thailand (believe it or not!) and last trip I bought a bracelet for my girlfriend back home. You can buy something nice for not too much. The recipients of my largesse have always been pleased.

 

The next day Joop and I go to the gold shop. There are bracelets in two weights labeled 1 and 2. (If somebody explains that to me, I would be most appreciative.) She immediately goes to the 2?s and Mr. Fight-for-Your-Baht knows this is not a good idea. She hovers over some of those gaudy, tasteless things with cylinders and balls. I try to steer her towards something more tasteful (to me, and of course my taste is so impeccable it transcends subjectivity! IMHO). Anyway I know this is going nowhere because she?s looking at 2?s and I just let her settle on something for a second and I ask the clerk ?taorai? (how much) and she says 3,600 baht ($85) and I say ?mai chai, pang? (uh-uh, it?s too expensive) and I point my little tilac (sweetie) to the 1?s where she clouds up over the more delicate and tasteful bracelets. She finally settles for a chain link style, which gives the impression of being bigger than the others although it weighs the same and Zane forks over 1,800 baht. Outside I ask her, ?Okay, mai?? (Okay?) ?Mai okay. Mai soowai.? ?Not okay, not beautiful.? Fortunately Mr. Fight-for-Your-Baht did not have the language skills to tell Joop about his policy towards ingratitude which would have been something like, ?You?re looking at your last gift from me you little bitch!? She tucked it into a pocket and I assumed I would never see it again. Zane?s out $42 and nobody?s happy.

 

(Before some of my ?fans? go off on me again, please know that I had been giving her money all along and had plans to give her more. In my mind, the expense of the bracelet was part of the whole thing. I ended up giving her about 7,000 baht for 8 days.)

 

That moment was our roughest spot. Not too terrible. I told myself to keep cool and neither one of us wanted to talk about it. I brought it up the next day when everything was sweet again, and I told her I knew she wasn?t happy with the bracelet because she wasn?t wearing it, and she said no, she was happy with it and she had given it to her mother for safe keeping because she was afraid of theives. She had warned be about the thieves about town before and we had spent time off separately when that might really be a worry for her. Then she told me that something would happen with the bracelet when we went out to her moo ban again tomorrow. And here I get to what I referred to in the title of this post (Finally! Thank you Buddha!) What do these things mean?

 

The next day we go to the moo ban again and everything is always so great there. Joop had told me that they had made something for me, but I didn?t understand what. Something about the weather being so hot. When we got to her house there was a brand new bamboo shelter built outside! Like a field rest house. Floor two feet off the ground, thatch roof. Really beautiful. I can?t believe they really built this for me! They probably wanted it anyway and built it because I was around and this was a way of paying me a compliment. Compliment accepted, thank you very much! Anyway, Zane sent out for Beer Chang as usual and the boys repaired to the shelter.

 

In a little while, Joop came out with her mother who handed her the ubiquitious little red plastic jewelery ?box? of Thailand. Joop took out the bracelet and gave it to me to put on her wrist. One of the fellows took my camera and took pictures. After this Joop wore the bracelet for the rest of the time we were together. This certainly had the feel of a ceremony. Was it? What did it mean? I?m not engaged, am I?? Ha!

 

Another very particular thing happened. A little less formal but definitely planned. Just as I left their home for the last time I was told to wait. Joop?s grandmother (mother?s mother) fetched an orange sigh-an (yarn braclet that is worn for good luck and protection) and carefully tied it on my left wrist. Back at the hotel Joop looked at it and showed me she had the same on her right wrist. When we hold hands the sigh-ans are together. Symbolism? Meaning?

 

Yes they would love to rope this farang, but Joop knows this isn?t possible. One thing I learned to say very early on: "Yak pen soat." (I like being single) To what extent she has communicated this to her family, I don?t know. They took REALLY good care of me. Worried over me all the time, made sure I had water, plugged in a fan everywhere I went. Joop even got one of the fellows to take walks with me. It was a big group effort which I will remember ever so fondly forever.

[phoenix]

Well, Zane, it appears to me that the nature of your relationship is shifting gradually. YOU may keep saying you'd like to stay single, but I'm not so sure about her intentions, and those of the family.

 

The gold bracelet thing is one I have experienced several times. Initially she'll pretend she isn't into gold. Then she'll start stopping at displays in shop windows. then, when you finally relent, she'll try and always bargain with you to get one bigger than you'd planned, no matter what you'd planned.

 

 

Any gold will give her a lift in her families eyes, and show them she's got at least a foot in your door. From there on, it's jsut a matter of who is more persistent. And boy, can THEY be persistent!!

 

You said you're tired of the p4p scene in pattaya, so what's wrong with persuing this 'relation' for a while? Of course, there will always be "pay" involved, but maybe on a less upfront way.

 

If I were in your shoes, I'd be totally torn between immersing myself in the experience, and running away screaming for fear of being snagged for good.

 

Up to you!

 

I do like your descriptions of the family experience. I have fond memeories of similar expereinces. Enjoy!

[rovineye]

1800 baht for 1 baht of gold! You are fighting for the baht, but am afraid you bought lead!

 

I was never asked for gold from my GF, but bought her a 1 baht bracelet for her birthday. She cried. She is 33 and no man has ever bought her a present. At all!

 

But the thing doesn't fit, and we look at gold shops in Phuket, BKK, Chiang Mai, and Mae Hong Son, but nothing she likes. I gotta admit, the one I found was far better than any other we saw. So she kept it and had an extra hasp added.

 

Well the next year, I ask her what she wants for her birthday. SHe says a two baht bracelet! Well it was not too outrageous a request, so I say OK. The reason is that she now knows where there is a two baht bracelet like the one I gave her (which she is no longer wearing). I see it in the shop and haul out the cash, and she jumps in, correcting the merchant because she has a 1 baht bracelet to trade in. The original one! She assumed I knew that was the plan all along. What a gal.

 

Now about the lean to and strings I don't know. I am trying to sort out the Lisu customs. She hands me a bite of ???? on a flower out bu the lake, and I eat it. The entire family bursts out in oooohs and ahhhhs, and laughter. WTF?

 

 

 

 

[zanemay]

Hello Phoenix...

 

 

"If I were in your shoes, I'd be totally torn between immersing myself in the experience, and running away screaming for fear of being snagged for good."

 

I don't worry about being snagged for good, because it's not in my nature. Be her boyfriend for a long, looooong time yes. If I married her or anyone else I would hate them in a year. THAT'S my nature. I admire people who can pull of long terms happily, but I'm not one of them.

 

"You said you're tired of the p4p scene in pattaya, so what's wrong with persuing this 'relation' for a while?"

As I said in my first post about Joop, if all goes well on my visit I would probably end up missing her, but I would find comfort in others.

When I got back to Pattaya, the phone started ringing. I have a few really nice gf's here AND I met the nicest (okay, the 2nd nicest!) girl. I might write a post in the General Section about her. Title: An Ordinary Prostitute. She is such a normal Thai girl in Pattaya, who doesn't like it...and is so extraordinarily nice to Zane. Two nights together. Last night she said she just wanted to come sleep with me, no sex or money. All night the greatest hugs and kisses.

 

Anyway, I only got into serious heartache for a couple of hours.

 

But long term girlfriend with Joop? I absolutely want it. I invited her and her lovely sister to go with me to Phuket next month.

 

Over and out,

Zane

 

 

 

 

 

[Pescator]

Hi Zanemay

 

1 baht gold is some 15,6 grammes.

You can see the current price at the frontpage of Bangkok Post. But it should be something like 5-6.000 bht.

 

Your GF`s name Joop? Like in kissing?

 

Cheers

Hua Nguu

 

[Pescator]

Hi Zanemay,

 

Come to think of it, with the prices you are referring to the weight of the bracelets in question were probably not in the Baht category but in the Saleung category.

4 Saleung are 1 baht.

 

 

Cheers

Hua Nguu

 

Thai Gold