keith doug Posted June 6, 2003 Report Share Posted June 6, 2003 This girl seemed so nice so sweet so cute...Until we went hotel and she fell on bed and went to sleep that was it!!! i tried dam to wake her up until i showed her 500 bhat note.!!!and kiked her out! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jacko Posted June 6, 2003 Report Share Posted June 6, 2003 Perhaps you should have tried kicking her out without the 500 baht note. Maybe then she may have been more friendly! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ranger Posted June 8, 2003 Report Share Posted June 8, 2003 KD, Wow, pretty nice trip report . Sometimes I get bored reading these stories, but yours kept my attention right up to the finish. Maybe you should see if Sarisin needs any help with his stories for the paysite . Ranger Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BadaBing Posted June 8, 2003 Report Share Posted June 8, 2003 I would give yours an A+ , a couple of trips back for me , the Grace Hotel girl I took back just puked all over my room for a couple of hours , and that was before she ever saw me in the buff... :: Bada Bing Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarisin Posted June 8, 2003 Report Share Posted June 8, 2003 Says Ranger: KD, Wow, pretty nice trip report . Sometimes I get bored reading these stories, but yours kept my attention right up to the finish. Maybe you should see if Sarisin needs any help with his stories for the paysite . Ranger The hell with me, Ranger. This is prime material for the next writing contest. Please, KD, no more. Save it for the next contest. Alright, let's go easy on the fine fellow. His post did not once contain the magic word: t-e-r-m-a-i-e. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 8, 2003 Report Share Posted June 8, 2003 Great report--I think it would be a contender for the trip report contest--Haiku division Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maxal Posted June 8, 2003 Report Share Posted June 8, 2003 Haiku Thai Style! An interesting concept for TG stories... Could probably be funny as hell or just plain deep thought hell??? Here's one of mine... BG smiled. I smiled. In hotel BG goes starfish. I pay her on the way out. BG asks to see me again. I smile as taxi drives far away. What do you guys think? Will it work? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fiery Jack Posted June 9, 2003 Report Share Posted June 9, 2003 Says maxal: Haiku Thai Style! An interesting concept for TG stories... Could probably be funny as hell or just plain deep thought hell??? Here's one of mine... BG smiled. I smiled. In hotel BG goes starfish. I pay her on the way out. BG asks to see me again. I smile as taxi drives far away. What do you guys think? Will it work? No, because "haiku" poetry is a traditional Japanese literary discipline requiring authorial detachment and the inclusion of a "seasonal" reference word, however vague or veiled or symbolic. Without the seasonal reference, haiku become "senryu". Formally, both haiku and senryu require strict adherence to a structure of three separate line elements of 5, 7, and 5 syllabic beats respectively. Stress-placement is left in the hands of the writer. Your effort fails to meet haiku requirements on all counts: metrically perverse, authorial intrusion, and no seasonal term. In fact, I don't think what you have written is poetry of any form (except perhaps in a loosest "poetry as anti-poetry" postmodernist sense). The word "smile(d)" is fruitlessly repeated too often, and "on the way out" and the final phrase "taxi drives far away" are both I think ambiguous in a clumsy rather than a figuratively provocative way. (If you'd written "bargirl goes jellyfish" you'd have had more of a chance. Jellyfish are seasonal creatures in Japan, but starfish are not. ) jack Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maxal Posted June 9, 2003 Report Share Posted June 9, 2003 Your critique is pure poetry FJ! My "Thai style Haiku" attempt was just pure silliness. Now how about some REAL Haiku from you? :: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fiery Jack Posted June 9, 2003 Report Share Posted June 9, 2003 Says maxal: Your critique is pure poetry FJ! My "Thai style Haiku" attempt was just pure silliness. Now how about some REAL Haiku from you? :: LOL Maxal . I wouldn't dare . But the best Haiku (though that smart-arsed tit Fiery Jack would no doubt tell you it's actually a "senryu" ) I ever read was one by the very excellent British 'pop' poet John Cooper Clarke , the "Bard of Salford". Entitled simply "Haiku" it goes: To convey one's mood In seventeen syllables Is very diffic... jack Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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