Day6/7 - Through the Looking Glass

[Encore]

Thru the looking glass

 

I left the story where we were going to tawandaeng issan, we being Ms BL, her best friend Tit ( although she hadn't got that much tit), and her other best friend Jackie, a very dark skinned server at a bar I usually don't visit. Jackie is fun, but many people think she's a Tom, hotly denied by Ms BL.

i initially was going to meet her early that evening, but got caught up playing assholes with C and J at Toxic, which is rather compelling, especially because of their personality. Sometimes I think Ms C would make a very good B&D Mistress.

maybe I'd better not tell her, might give her career ideas.

 

At 9.00 I get a panicked phone call "where are you?"

No panic, TWDI doesnâ??t really start until 11.00PM anyway.

I suppose she was scared I might bail out, and then she'd have to pay her own BF, because she had declined to start work because i was coming.

Got to her bar 9.15. "We must go eat"

What? I am just recovering from that huge lunch at MBK, and TWDI has food.

"Must eat first"

 

OK, next doors Sam2000. Food arrives, she disappears back to her bar "Must go toilet firstâ?Â. When she comes back, ten minutes later, eating is a drawn out affair, she eats very little off her plate, Tit and J. eat a bit off her plate, then the left over half gets shunted to the table outside BW for her other colleagues to finish. Three of us hop in a random taxi, where she introduces me in fine detail to the Isan cabbie, including my Lao language skills, my job, marital status and possibly details of my sexual prowess and technique, I am not sure. Tit, who spent last nite with us occasionally chips in with the odd titbit..

We get to TWDI, sit fairly close to front, and have to endure 40 minutes of loud crappy rap type music before the show starts.

 

A bottle of whiskey appears, and some food (What? more food?)

When the music starts all is forgiven, it is a fun show, and the dancers are often delicious. I get pressed into dancing, relax and enjoy it. Before I know, it is 2.00 AM, home time.

 

She's asked me during the day if I'd go with her the next day visit her sister, who's looking after MsBL's 10 yr old daughter. Living near Chonburi, not far, I don't mind a drive and we could go to the beach. i do realise it maybe a plot to ensnare me, but I've been very upfront several times, saying I don't do relationships/Mia Noi/marriage/babies etc, butterfly forever. Besides, I'm married already.

 

Before I left to go to TWDI, I chatted with Ms C (the potential dominatrix bartender at Toxic) , who asked what I planned for next day. When I mentioned going to Chonburi and why, she lectured me sternly, saying I was putting thoughts and hopes into that poor girl's head ( the poor girl is ten years her senior) by agreeing to go meet her family. I denied that, saying I am upfront with my non-commitment. "never mind, she still will think maybe have chance".

 

On the way home from TWDI, MsBL asked what time I planned to leave next day. I suggested that by the time we'd be asleep it would be after 3.00AM, last night only four hours sleep, maybe leave next morning around 10.00 at the earliest.

 

Cannot, we must leave at 6.30 AM

WTF

Tit and Jackie want to come also, and they'd have to be back before 6.00 PM because otherwise they'd have to pay barfine.

That was the first I heard about the others coming, but i had no problem, the more the merrier. But I put my foot down about wake up time.

"cannot, old man needs sleep"

She kept on pushing , all the way home. We dropped off at SC to get something from her bar (Phone charger? Clothes?), I waited outside, since it was 2.30 already. She came back with Jackie, again asked can we leave early.

NO!

Tit was coming home with us, but changed her mind, went to her apartment to sleep an pick up beach clothes.

When we got home, her behaviour deteriorated, sulking, trying to argue. I said that i was happy to drive her, and if her friends wanted to come it was up to them to arrange time off work.

 

THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS

 

To change the subject, I asked her when was the last time she saw her daughter.At that point, she burst into tears, almost hysterical. I held her, and when she calmed down a bit, she said I didn't understand.

 

No, I didn't.

 

Then she talked. Her daughter was mentally handicapped (Mongoloid?), a condition she described as 70%, e.g. 70% mental function only, could talk, but not go to school. Her sister had looked after her for many years, and was de-facto mother. MsBL hadn't been to see her for several months, she was slightly tense with her sister, who asked her for more maintenance money, and basically, she was very scared about the upcoming visit. She was scared her daughter would reject her, and her sister be angry for little money she had to contribute. Sisters husband didn't approve of her bringing a falang client along.

 

She had rallied her friends to come along to dilute the situation and give her moral support for a meeting she feared more than anything.

All this came out, interspersed with deep sobbing.

I've been around many crying women, also crying BGs over the years, and think I recognise the difference between real and unreal. This was real.

She had never talked to me about her private life before in the 5 or six previous one night stands with her, always was the eternally smiling soft warm fun girl. She probably needed to be drunk to be able to talk about it.

 

Suddenly, I saw a part of her life that i had no idea existed, the sadness hidden behind the eternal smile, the motivation for her working bar.

 

She started to calm down, I held her. By now it was nearly 4.00 AM.

I realised I had no more urge for any sex that night, not under the circumstances. Anyway, Iâ??d shagged myself silly for the past five days, and the laundry/massage lady late that afternoon had taken the edge off.

Then suddenly she asked me, "before we go sleep, can you please use your mouth on me?"

WTF?????

I explained I had no desire for sex, would be happy to hold and cuddle her while she fell asleep.

 

" No, I don't want to fuck, she said, I only want you to make me come, help me sleep"

 

Well, what can a man do? A therapeutic administration of cunninglingus, as prescribed by the doctor. I suppose it is better then sleeping pills. It also worked, she came within minutes, pulled me up next to her, kissed me , and fell asleep almost instantly. So did I.

 

I woke at 7.00 (Three hours sleep again), went to get some coffee, picked up my email, and woke up MsBL. She phoned Tit ( i had in the meantime promised to pay Tit's BF, so she could come as support group) But Tit had gotten even drunker then when she arrived home at 3.00, was in a terrible state of hangover, and wouldn't come. No phone for Jackie (She'd dropped two down the toilet in the past three months), so in the end we went alone.

On the way to Chonburi, she phoned her sister several times. They had decided to meet at the beach at Chang Saen. i like that idea, maybe it was also neutral ground for MsBL. She had asked her three sisters and husbands to come along. One husband wouldn't come, disapproving of MsBL's profession and the falang coming along. One wouldn't come because of work, the third sister would come late with her 2 daughters.

 

We arrived at 11.30, settled under the umbrellas on the beachfront.

I'd never been there, but knew it was a popular beach resort for Thai people, hardly a falang in sight. Quite crowded, because it was school holidays. (Maybe coinciding with OokPanSA?).

As soon as the two of us had sat down, she ordered. Ten minutes later, a full bottle of SangSom arrived, with icebucket, soda and water. then a big tray of steamed giant prawns, a plate of somtam, and a bowl of cockles. a beach vendor added two plates of deepfried battered prawns (Thai women love prawns in any form. )

 

An hour later, sister, husband with a 7 year old son called Nat and the ten year old daughter of MsBL arrived. She, named Peck, but endearingly nicknamed "70%" by the family (Thai do have a way of using nicknames!) did indeed have mild facial features indicated mongolism, and i could detect some signs that she was different. I was told that often she wouldn't eat, so everyone was happy when she accepted rice on spoon shoveled into her mouth. She addressed MsBL as "meh", but almost seemed more comfortable with her aunt.

More food was ordered, tiny deepfried prawns, squid, a plate of steamed crab, a plate of tiny deepfried crab, a plate of oysters.

 

MsBL pressed me to come along for a swim with the children. (they'd been in and out of the sea from the moment whey arrived), and by now it was about three. i didn't feel like it initially, but suddenly realised it was her way of escaping the awkward conversation, and spent time with the kids.

 

Even in the water she seemed more at ease with nephew Nat then with Peck. We hung around in the water on some black inner tubes, and cavorted a bit, splashing etc. I relaxed, and actually enjoyed it. Peck didn't seem to mind me being there, and occasionally would push me playfully. She did talk, although most of it I didn't understand, and she demonstrated being able to count to fifteen.

At 4.00, sister nr2 arrived with two delightful daughters, 12 and 8. the twelve year old was an excellent swimmer, learning english at school, and i swear she was flirting a bit with me. or maybe she just liked the newness of meeting a falang in person.

 

I'd heard MsBL describing me and my marital status to the family, so there were no illusions, although I was invited several times to family celebrations coming up in Kalasin later this month, and again in April next year. I'd love to go since I like that kind of thing for different reasons, but i am pretty sure that would be a bad idea, reinforce the idea that I was a potential candidate for making her Mia Noi.

 

To my surprise, although usually she's fairly reserved, she wasn't hiding her affection for me for the family, frequently giving me a hom (sniffkiss), and holding my arm, touching me. When the two of us walked to the toilet block a few hundred meters away, she holding my hand, she said what i had noticed: "everyone is looking at us".

Well, I am almost twice her age, and falang to boot.

"Do you mind?"

"No i don't care!!!"

back at the place we were sitting she leaned over to me and whispered "I will miss you so much", which really disturbed me. i have been trying to avoid such a situation, and several times over the past few days emphasised this was an exception to my 'one night only ' rule which was only this time, "NO MIA NOI, No Feehn, no girlfriend, I'm an evil philandering whoremonger."

 

I think the kisses, and the touching were really a need for support in an anxious situation. Of course the other way she was coping was working her way (aided by her family and me) through that bottle of Sangsom. (Last night, only twelve hours earlier, we'd with the four of us polished of the previous bottle.).

She pressed me again to come swimming, then to hire a ride on a bananaboat, a big long inflatable, on which you can fit 5 or six people that gets towed at considerable speed across the waves by a jetski. We fitted a sister and husband, MSBL, myself and the three young girls.

i would never do that kind of thing on my own, but when someone gets me to join them I usually enjoy it. it was quite exhilarating in a way, and an excuse for her to scream and holler, letting off steam. of course at the end of the ride we were all thrown of in the water.

By five o'clock, more food arrived, we solidly ate from 11.30 until we left at 6.30. Ms BL was getting a bit scratchy, and i think it was just in time when we left to avoid something blowing up.

 

She said she had a great time, the family all bade me a warm goodbye and again extended invitations, and we took off in our own car back to BKK. I had resisted more Sangsom the past two hours and was OK, she had almost helped finish the bottle, and suggested we'd stay the night in Bang Saen. I refused, and she basically fell asleep in a few minutes.

 

When we got back to BKK it was nearly 9.00 (I'd taken the Bagna Trat motorway, but missed the Bangna turnoff and ended up coming into BKK via Suvannapoom .

On the way to the hotel, she said â??are you hungry?â?Â

 

I said NO WAY, eating all day. She said "I ate very little" maybe she did, maybe the food was merely to impress the family. I didn't want to stop and said we'd go to the hotel, park the car, then I'd sit down with a drink for 20 minutes or so, and we could discuss where to find more food. On arrival I dumped my bags in the lobby, and sailed straight into the bar, calling her to come along. Instead, she went up to the room with her bags, then came down and took my bags up.

 

Half an hour later, i found her deep asleep, I went back down to play more cards, joke with the girls and got introduced to two new,very beautiful and smart English speaking members of the 'Take Out" crew, these two look like they escaped from Soi 33 or better, quite a contrast after bottomtrawling on SC far the past week. I fended them off by telling them I already had someone in my bed, but she responded by saying I'd probably stay at that hotel again, and it would be nice to get to know me for future.

 

At 11.00, I was in quandry. last night was TWDI, no SC. Tonight my last night in BKK for a while, did I want to go back and see some more naked bodies?

I decided I was too tired and had seen enough flesh over a week. I went up, and BL was awake, looking relaxed, tired and happy mixed with a tinge of sadness. I went and got some precooked food from 7/11 around the corner which we ate sitting on the ground, watching a silly movie.

I sorted the photos we'd taken during the day, including a few of her and Peck, which once again brought tears to her eyes, but in an OK way. Almost to mine too.

 

We fell asleep cuddled up together, me feeling with dread that I'd have to practice tough love and dump her tomorrow. I had noticed that during the day I had at times toyed with the idea of taking her with me to the beach for a week, still felt like that, but realized that would be a very dangerous idea. I felt myself getting close to her, and cannot afford in my situation to do so.

 

I once, seven years ago allowed myself to be sucked into a relationship, and know it will only end up in tears, so this time I'll bail out in time.

 

In the morning she was quiet and loving. I wasnâ??t going to have sex, she went for a shower, then came back wrapped in her towel. i was finishing my coffee and pulled her back on the bed for a last cuddle, adding 'don't worry, I don't want sex, only hold you. "

I put my head on her breast and enjoyed her smell. then that seem to flick an invisible switch (Pheromones?), and a few seconds later we were at it with great passion.

 

We packed my bags, and loaded the car. Then she pecked me on the cheek, waved and hailed a motorbike to take her back to the Soi.

 

i'm going to have to be very resolute, when i come back in a week to give her some photos, I must resist B-fining her.

 

I felt quite sentimental and confused on my way down to the beach, conflicting emotions.

 

â??Come on mate, you've been whore-mongering, she's selling her body to you, wake up!â?Â

 

But the other side is also real.

 

[Dumsoda]

 

â??Come on mate, you've been whore-mongering, she's selling her body to you, wake up!â?Â

 

But the other side is also real.

 

Oh YES...

 

[YimSiam]

There's a Thai girl in the bathroom right now, I've been with her four or five times in the past month - she's working, I know, but it can be so tempting to let that part slip my mind, especially here outside of Thailand... Getting to know her, she me... The trap is so inviting, though I'm certainly experienced enough now to know better!

 

Great post, Ikkrang. Many thanks for putting the time and effort into writing it up - I'll be back for another read-through tomorrow, while this girl is curled in my bed, my Saturday slipping past yet again while I wonder...

 

YimSiam

 

 

 

 

[hooky]

Superb post!

 

Hooky.

[YimSiam]

ikkrang,

 

hm. i wouldn't be so worried about her motives or sincerity - yes, probably she does have her eye on some money or some other benefit at some point, but that's to be expected, and everything she's doing seems perfectly genuine. i see her making a play for you, putting her chips on the table with the family to earn some of her lost status, and would she do that if she didn't think there was a good chance that she might hold onto you?

 

No matter how many times you say "Baby, I'm a no-good farang, I've got a black heart, I just pay barfine and fuck, etc.", all she hears is "Baby, blah blah blah, blah pay barfine blah blah"

 

(This happens whether you are telling the truth or not - when I say it in all seriousness or my more jai dee buddies say it despite actually being good people, the girls ignore equally.)

 

Being a good man, you drive out and meet the family and swim with the disabled daughter... And go down on this woman like you're a Thai girl's version of the Star of Light (or is it Star of Love? Anyway, you apparently go down dutifully, and to prompt effect...) Maybe best of all, you take charge of the situation and lay down your rules, just like a good man should... Her strategy must appear to be working quite well from her perspective, and she's probably mooning about the bar, her head filled with Ikkrang dreams...

 

One of the things I used to enjoy most about the p4p scene in Thailand was that you didn't just get the physical act, but most anything else you wanted from the girl was also accessible. If you want to see her family, she can do that, or she can pretend to be your girlfriend and go to dinner and shopping and all that. If you want to lie in bed and hear the litany of terrible things that have happened to her during her life (and it seems they all have them) and what her dreams and plans are for the future, you can do that, too. You can even be her future - jokingly for that half hour of pillowtalk, semi-seriously for e.g., the drive to the village to meet the family, or most seriously, wedding, visa, Pattaya balcony misstep, etc.

 

Seems your challenge now will be deciding how much of yourself you might be willing to offer her, rather than whether or not she's just after money. Is it expanded p4p, or something else?

 

Look forward to reading more -

 

YimSiam

 

 

[Encore]

Never beyond expanded P4P. I alraedy had a couple of phone calls "Khithoot Khun......."

 

I am not prepared to take things much furtehr with her, just to prevent her getting too hooked in.

I hate see them having false expectations and hurt as a result. It does happen.

 

I like your take on it all, pretty accurate.

 

Yes, I like the GFE from time to time, especially if I haven't experienced it for a while.