When Bookings Go Awry ...

[gobbledonk]

http://www.tripadvisor.com/Hotel_Review-g297415-d506910-Reviews-Pattaya_Hotel-Shenzhen_Guangdong.html

 

Two weeks in Shenzhen wouldnt be my idea of a 'holiday', but you've gotta love their entreprenurial spirit.

[radioman]

More years ago than I care to remember, but has to have been at least 15 I was dispatched to a job in China. A problem on some patrol boats a Chinese ship building company was making for the Pakistan Navy. (Had to be seen to be believed) Anyway the boats were on the Pearl River about half way between Hong Kong and Guangzhou, a place called Taiping. Our local rep booked the Holiday Inn for me. Well I thought it was the Holiday Inn, in fact it was the Holidays Inn, hmm crafty little s in there. So I arrived and checked in, room on the third floor but unfortunately no elevator, room was small but at least a double bed, a rickety wardrobe, tiny (unintentionally folding) table, small bedside cabinet with telephone and an A4 sized piece of paper taped to the bedside cabinet proclaiming 'Dile *9# for do not distrub' Seemed a bit overkill I thought in my ignorance until about 9pm rolled round. Then the bloody phone never stopped. Phone rings, I answer, massageee? No thanks, phone rings again, massageee? No thanks. Again, massageeeee? NO THANKS. Okay time to dial *9#.

Turns out the hotel was just a front for the nightclub brothel across the street. Sitting in the coffee shop I watched as girls would wander across to the lobby and get a list of numbers from reception then make their way to the house phones and start the cold calling. The next night our local rep took me into the nightclub/brothel which was as big as an aircraft hangar and darker than a very dark place, slowly as the eyes adjusted I could make out some sofas and around the walls a thousand Chinese hookers all desperately trying to make eye contact. What could have been a boring week turned out to be quite fun, but it sort of put me off Chinese girls for good.

 

The name theft though is something I'll never forget. Even the script was done in the Holiday Inn style.

[limbo]

Why did it put you off Chinese girls?

[radioman]

I like my girls smooooooth. All the Chinese girls I've ever been with had enough thatch to roof a house.Did try to get a couple to depilate, unsuccessfully.

[gobbledonk]

I like my girls smooooooth. All the Chinese girls I've ever been with had enough thatch to roof a house.Did try to get a couple to depilate, unsuccessfully.

 

Same here. I was with one Shanghainese for a few months, but she steadfastly refused to shave her legs, much less her bush - wasnt a particularly hairy gal, but its still off-putting when you grow up around women who shave their legs. Throw in a generally lacklustre sexual appetite (lets just say it was 'up and down' !) and we soon parted ways.