candyfloss Posted March 26, 2012 Report Share Posted March 26, 2012 GUYS. Save wasted trips to the local swimming baths by ringing them up to ask if there is any bikini-clad big titted talent in the pool before you set off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
candyfloss Posted March 26, 2012 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2012 POLICE. Save money on expensive sirens by putting a police dog on the roof of your patrol car and shutting the door on its tail before attending a 999 call. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
candyfloss Posted March 26, 2012 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2012 MAKERS OF the Gillette Mach 3 razor. Save money by putting the blade that shaves the closest at the front, and forgetting about the other two. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
candyfloss Posted March 26, 2012 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2012 A USED CONDOM filled with water, and left on a radiator, makes an ideal and inexpensive Lava Lamp. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
candyfloss Posted March 26, 2012 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2012 ONE ARMED men. If your partner is thinking about getting breast implants, convince her to save money and only get one done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
candyfloss Posted March 26, 2012 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2012 TOWN COUNCILS. Reduce litter problems by issuing blind people with sharp pointy sticks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
candyfloss Posted March 26, 2012 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2012 LADIES. Prevent sexist workmen from shouting "Get yer tits out!" by having them permanently on display. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
candyfloss Posted March 26, 2012 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2012 POTHOLERS. Take a tip from cats and avoid getting stuck in holes by growing a moustache to the exact width of your body. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
candyfloss Posted March 26, 2012 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2012 RAPPERS. Avoid having to say 'know what I'm sayin' all the time by speaking clearly in the first place. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
candyfloss Posted March 26, 2012 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2012 JOURNALISTS for local TV stations. Fool viewers into thinking you have been sent abroad by pausing for a few seconds before answering questions the presenter asks you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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