MooNoi Posted September 5, 2003 Report Share Posted September 5, 2003 Have you read the thread on the 78 year old? Good luck to him, I say. Why should he conform to the stereotype and waste his time on pensioners coach trips to boring, windswept seaside resorts in farangland when he could have so much fun here. Why should a 50 year old use valuable time on a 20 year old is a more interesting question. The answer is that because here in Thailand you can have a lot of fun doing that. Who cares what the motivation of the girl is? Why does a 20 year old girl in farangland have sex with a 25 year old man? Because she is in love with him? In all cases? More likely because he has taken her to a disco, bought her a meal and she is feeling horny. In any case, this "in love" bit I think is mostly bollocks. I blame Shakespeare for writing the sickly sweet lines of Romeo and Juliet. We have been stuck with these illusions ever since. Right on! Great answer, and 100% agree with you, Khwai! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
torrenova Posted September 8, 2003 Report Share Posted September 8, 2003 Says khwaimaisabai: "Do you think a 20 y.o. tg would actually want to have sex with a 50 something y.o. guy like you if it weren't for economic necessity." Have you read the thread on the 78 year old? Good luck to him, I say. Why should he conform to the stereotype and waste his time on pensioners coach trips to boring, windswept seaside resorts in farangland when he could have so much fun here. Why should a 50 year old use valuable time on a 20 year old is a more interesting question. The answer is that because here in Thailand you can have a lot of fun doing that. Who cares what the motivation of the girl is? No 20yr old would want a 50yr slobbering all over her unless for economic necessity. If you believe otherwise you're living in cloud cockoo land. As for the 78yr old and others of similar age. I do not deny them their time in the sun, and no, they should not be forced out on day trips to windswept seaside resorts in farangland but they should also swallow a reality pill. An 80yr old man with a woman under about 50 looks silly, with a woman about 35 it looks like the "Anna Nicole Smith" freak show and with a girl of 20 it is, I am afraid, bordering on abuse. Enough - this is Thailand and we can do what we want.What a great attitude, economic power bypasses everything eh ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 8, 2003 Report Share Posted September 8, 2003 I blame Shakespeare for writing the sickly sweet lines of Romeo and Juliet. :: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 8, 2003 Report Share Posted September 8, 2003 No 20yr old would want a 50yr slobbering all over her unless for economic necessity. Girls don't want slobbering 50 yr old farang nor twenty yr old. An 80yr old man ... with a girl of 20 it is, I am afraid, bordering on abuse. Hard to tell which one is being abused. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
khwaimaisabai Posted September 8, 2003 Report Share Posted September 8, 2003 Says zenseless: Hard to tell which one is being abused. Hi zense, Good point. Khwai Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
khwaimaisabai Posted September 8, 2003 Report Share Posted September 8, 2003 Says zenseless: Girls don't want slobbering 50 yr old farang nor twenty yr old. Hi zense, Maybe I am wrong, but I would say that any girl in the bars, regardless of age, would rather be with a 50 year old who dressed smartly and treated her decently than with a slobbering 25 year old, drunk, smelly and looking bad. Khwai Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MooNoi Posted September 8, 2003 Report Share Posted September 8, 2003 Maybe I am wrong, but I would say that any girl in the bars, regardless of age, would rather be with a 50 year old who dressed smartly and treated her decently than with a slobbering 25 year old, drunk, smelly and looking bad. Hi Khwai... I don't think you're wrong, but I do think that in her 'ideal world' she'd rather be with neither of them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
khwaimaisabai Posted September 8, 2003 Report Share Posted September 8, 2003 Says FlyPapillon: I don't think you're wrong, but I do think that in her 'ideal world' she'd rather be with neither of them. Hi fly, I agree, and I don't disagree with the original idea that such a relationship - from the girls viewpoint - in most cases is entered into for economic motives. I would say economic choice rather than economic necessity. Where I differ with some is that I don't see anything necessarily wrong with this. Let's face it, many relationships between farangs and Thai girls with a low age difference have the same motivation as well. If we are talking about temporary "relationships" where commitment of any sort is not in the mind of either party then I would say the age gap makes no difference to the rightness or wrongness of it. I think what people have in mind here is a supposedly more committed relationship, possible even marriage. Let me offer an example of what I would see as a typical scenario. This is not 100% applicable, as any generalization, but I would say is representative of many such situations. The girl is 20 and has been in the bar for two years - can't be longer because of the minimum age rules. She has maybe had 200 different customers during very impressionable years. She is a bit srewed up mentally but is sick and tired of it all and wants out but sees no way. Her family have got used to the regular cash - and so has she. She has long since forgotten her dreams of an ideal young lover. She meets a 50 year old guy who treats her nicely and seems decent enough. She asks him to give her a regular allowance and for that she will leave the bar but be "available" whenever he wants. He agrees - one motivation from his side being to give the girl a better chance for her future. He quite likes her, of course, but would not say he is "in love". What exactly is wrong with this? Both parties win - and yes, the guy is allowed to indulge in a bit of self delusion now and again. Why would this be seen a a reprehensible deal? The girl is removed from the dangers and nasty side of life in the bar. She still has her money and can continue to support her family. He has an occasional companion for bar hopping, restaurants and other activities.... Surely she has gained over continuing to work in the bar, which is the option unless she can find somebody else. Are people saying that she should go on "working" and wait for a guy closer to her own age - she hasn't found anybody in two years already, remember? And in thirty years time, when he is 80 and she is 50, they can be seen in public together and have their relationship taken seriously - so we are told! Khwai Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest lazyphil Posted September 8, 2003 Report Share Posted September 8, 2003 I know of a guy/gal close to our house, shes late 20's and he mid 50's. At first I was a bit doubtful and thought looked a bit dodgy. But I now know them and see them interact and they both look genuinely very happy together. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mongatu Posted September 8, 2003 Report Share Posted September 8, 2003 No 20yr old would want a 50yr slobbering all over her unless for economic necessity [or economic choice]. Could there not be more to it than that, at least sometimes? One thing that may be relevant here is the female Thai perception of or attitude towards male and female age. Of course I'm generalizing here but several tg's I've questioned on this subject say that a farang man of, say 50, generally looks much younger to them then a Thai man of 50. That certainly is not hard to believe. (One tg told me, "Thai man 50 look old, you not look old.") Another thing is the Thai attitude towards age in general seems to be quite different than what we see in the West. Older people are treated with more respect and middle aged people don't seem to be regarded with quite the same disdain by the young as frequently is the case in the West. On the other hand, and in slight conflict to the above, Thai females seem to believe is that a woman is in many ways "old" by the time she hits around 25 or so. A third point that has been made in other threads is that the Thai female conception of "love" is somewhat different from ours and is more security oriented. Many seem to be quite scornful of Thai men, for what seem to be good reasons. (At least this is what several have told me.) With all that in mind, consider the following not uncommon example: A 25 year old nbg who has a typical low paying non sex industry related job. She had a Thai boyfriend or husband at one time, he got her pregnant, cheated on her and didn't work much or provide any support. She eventually dumped him. So here she is struggling to support her child or children and parents, and within Thai culture she is already "old," and not considered especially good marriage material. In other words, within Thai culture, her prospects are not that great. Suddenly that 50 y.o. farang is not looking so bad. In fact he is looking pretty good. And while there is an element of economic necessity [or choice] in all this, I choose to believe that, on both sides, real love can exist in this scenario, and based on personal experience, I would have to say that many 25 y.o. tgs seem to genuinely have a pretty good time while the 50 y.o is, so to speak, "slobbering" over her. [OK, I see we have twisted the topic around to what do TW think of us. Sorry, but more interesting topic anyway, no?] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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