Guest Posted June 25, 2001 Report Share Posted June 25, 2001 Your best bet is probably a single mother – someone whose husband has died/deserted her. With kids its unlikely that a Thai man would be interested so she might be willing to accept the arrangement you describe. She’d want some financial assistance of course for bringing up her kids but there would be no reason to assume that she wouldn’t be a fine person with the qualities that you are looking for. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 25, 2001 Report Share Posted June 25, 2001 quote: Originally posted by CondomKing:"dysfunctional relationship behavior", the extreme extent of rampant neurotic jelously, at least with many of the Thai women that I have been with or observed. A B/G that I had lived with for a while, and didn't love but I did like just fine, and hadn't cheated on, accused, interrogated, cried a lot, and, what was really the last straw, started to "sniff" my clothes whenever I came home. Nice girl, but I had to leave her. To the other extreme, a friend who is an investment banker, mid thirties, good looking, began a relationship with the daughter of an extremely wealthy Thai banker. She was US educated, owned a selection of Mercedes, etc but, in the jelousy department, exactly the same. Insane and ridiculous jelousy. He had to break it off, and with much difficulty. Guido.[/QB] = exactly the same totally irrational trait in the philippines, varying from slight to absolutely obsessive, followed by death-threats or even worse--disMEMBERment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CondomKing Posted June 27, 2001 Report Share Posted June 27, 2001 quote: Originally posted by billy ruben 69: exactly the same totally irrational trait in the philippines, varying from slight to absolutely obsessive, followed by death-threats or even worse--disMEMBERment. [/QB] OUCH!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 29, 2001 Report Share Posted June 29, 2001 I tried to reply last night to this thread, but cut it off because I thought my dog was being eaten by a mountain lion. Really. But a false alarm. So I'll be brief this time before I am interrupted. I want to respond to people who attribute irrationality or personality disorders to a significant portion of Thai society--not just bar girls, who probably ARE often damaged, even by Thai standards. I want to caution people that irrationality and even insanity are largely in the eyes of the beholder. I am not arguing along with psychoanalyst R.D. Laing, I believe, who claimed that schizophrenia is simply an alternate reality. But rather, I want to point out what seems obvious: what appears crazy and irrational, i.e., lacking apparent reason, hence inexplicable, from one cultural perspective might make perfect sense from another. For example, in Conrad's "Heart of Darkness," Marlow reacts to the incomprehensible Africans by saying that it reminded him of "an enthusiastic outbreak in a madhouse," or something like that. And I recall showing an Indonesian batik sarong to a Thai teacher once, and because of the alien color patterns, he said anyone wearing it would surely be insane. And I am not trying to be PC here, but I think even excessive jealousy, the example cited, can have cultural value in Thai society. One might speculate that excessive demonstrations of jealousy might offer women, who hold a lower social status in Thai society, one of the few culturally licensed excuses to show anger and emotion, even aggression, without losing face--it's all right in this context to let one's feelings show, and it might even be "empowering" (I know, awful word). Also, perhaps eliciting obvious male jealousy is taken as a more sincere expression of affection in a society that doesn't value telling the truth (euphemism for Thai men lying like hell). My own Thai gf intentionally pushes my buttons to make me jealous, and then says, "good, now I know you care about me." If I simply said it, she would probably not believe me. Anyway, just my opinion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 29, 2001 Report Share Posted June 29, 2001 .just as well you were brief....I thought it was that fool Trink..oh your not are you?No .surely........ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 29, 2001 Report Share Posted June 29, 2001 bb, Guilty as charged--not about being Trink, but about being long-winded. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CondomKing Posted June 30, 2001 Report Share Posted June 30, 2001 quote: Originally posted by Nemo642: And I am not trying to be PC here, but I think even excessive jealousy, the example cited, can have cultural value in Thai society. One might speculate that excessive demonstrations of jealousy might offer women, who hold a lower social status in Thai society, one of the few culturally licensed excuses to show anger and emotion, even aggression, without losing face--it's all right in this context to let one's feelings show, and it might even be "empowering" (I know, awful word). Also, perhaps eliciting obvious male jealousy is taken as a more sincere expression of affection in a society that doesn't value telling the truth (euphemism for Thai men lying like hell). My own Thai gf intentionally pushes my buttons to make me jealous, and then says, "good, now I know you care about me." If I simply said it, she would probably not believe me. Anyway, just my opinion. Yes, and that's what I'm talking about. Really, who needs it? It's just another aspect of the "charm of Thailand" that I can well do without. G. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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