Savittre Posted September 18, 2001 Report Share Posted September 18, 2001 Hi Guys, Really what I want to know is what a Thai person means when she says you've got a black heart. I had told her about some bad stuff that has happened recently in my life, basically marriage breakup, losing custody of my child, and all contact with my child, too, when the child and I had been very close (I worked part-time because I had enough money and wanted to play a more active parenting role... my life's gone from that to, as I said, no contact at all. Don't ask! ) So the Thai girl says I don't love her, and I have a black heart. Does this girl simply mean I'm bitter over the way things have gone with my child, or are there other meanings here that I'm not aware of? Again, what is 'Black Heart'? Does she mean that I won't allow myself to get into an emotional relationship (e.g. fall in love) in order to protect myself against more hurt?Thanks, as always! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bibblies Posted September 18, 2001 Report Share Posted September 18, 2001 I suggest you get yourself a copy of Christopher Moore's book "Heart Talk", which gives hundreds of descriptions of these sort of things. It'll pinpoint it exactly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
khunsanuk Posted September 18, 2001 Report Share Posted September 18, 2001 Hi, Black heart, jai dam, means that you are a bad person. I don't think she likes you very much, sorry. Sanuk! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 19, 2001 Report Share Posted September 19, 2001 did you get here exact phrase? jai mai dee or jep jai, manybe she was sorry you have a broken heart? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pattaya127 Posted September 19, 2001 Report Share Posted September 19, 2001 This is one of the great farang/thais cultural divides, I think, outside of what the guys have to say about the meaning of the word and your own G/F. Many times, I have noticed how thais are just tuned mostly to their own family's mishaps, and pay only lip service to your own. It may have to do with the fact that for hundred years the family circle is the only trustworthy network, or that we farangs have strange problems with our wives at home, instead of just raising a family. I dunno, but that great virtue Buddhism encourages: compassion, I rarely witness genuinely, though a few kind words would re-assure sometimes. Plenty of food for thought in that subject in regard to what TG/Fs expect from us opposed to what has no special input in their life. [ October 01, 2001: Message edited by: pattaya127 ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roger Posted September 19, 2001 Report Share Posted September 19, 2001 quote: Originally posted by pattaya127: I dunno, but that great virtue Buddhism encourages: compassion, I rarely witness genuinely, though a few kind words can re-assure sometimes. Compassionate Thai Buddhists; a dying breed in my opinion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spirit_of_town_hall Posted October 1, 2001 Report Share Posted October 1, 2001 Hello, the label "black heart" is used quite liberally. I've heard it applied to obviously wealthy Thai Chinese (who they don't even know), to some one who doesn't agree with them. Don't take it to heart, as regards your child custody issue, it wont be that, the Thais couldn't comprehend the cruel discrimination, common law dishes out to fathers. Literally in as far as the UK goes the woman has to be a crack addict whore for the father to get custody! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Savittre Posted October 1, 2001 Author Report Share Posted October 1, 2001 Hi Guys, Yeah, actually it wasn't she who called me black heart, she told me that her friend had said that (Big difference, huh? ) In a subsequent e-mail, she told me 'black heart meaning hard heart'. Whatever. Then she said 'I never think you are black heart same like my friend say.' HA! In any case, I will say this, it was a 'holiday romance' in Bangkok, the G/F thing. I told her that I'd never worked so hard to make any girl feel special, not my x-wife, not any x-G/F. That is 110% true. I've just found, as you know, that Thai women have that knack of making me feel really special, like a king, and this girl also did, so I thought it was time to spare no effort or expense to treat her well, make her feel special, especially as that's how she'd made me feel. I took her shopping until she was truly tired of it, no mean feat!!! We went to very nice restaurants, e.g. The Peninsula, riverside. Went to the dinner/cultural show thing. Movies. Etc. I posted on these boards, and you guys were nice enough to reply with your ideas of what might be fun. But it was never intended to be anything more than a pleasant time in Bangkok, and I did allow myself to become infatuated. She, however, continued to e-mail me, yeah, and now I get this 'black heart' accusation. It's obviously not the end of the world, but I can't say I appreciate it, 'cause I thought I did a lot to be nice to her while we were together!! At this point I've just broken it off entirely, I told her it was time we stop keeping in touch, that's the way it is and so shall it stay!! Well, she wanted me to meet her parents, and there's no way in the world I'm going to go that route!!!! I told her I didn't agree to meet them, as nicely, gently as I could, but you can bet she wasn't happy to hear it. Well, sometimes that's the way things go... So much for doing the G/F thing!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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