How To Stop A School Bully

[Guest]

I want to help my sister, who is a single mother with her son who is being bullied at school. This happened once before in another school, where the teachers were of not much help. They did call the parents into school to tell them about their son's behaviour but the bullying continued. Eventually, being the person I am I took it on myself and went straight to the house and confronted both the boy involved and his mother, telling her in no uncertain terms if I had course to return she would regret it and I meant it.

 

She believed me as my sisters boy was never bullied by this boy again. Maybe this was not the right thing to do but it worked. Now in another school because my sisters son is a quite gentle type of boy, a bully has singled him out as an easy target. Anyone any advice what is the best way for a 13 year old boy who is gentle and mild by nature to deal with a larger and older bully.

 

My sister spoke to the teachers at the school and the parents of the bully were called in, but it has continued. The boy involved is well on his way to being an unpleasant adult bully in later life. So should my sister's boy hit back and be forced to fight even if he is hurt ... or is there another way other than a face to face confrontation of the boys parents, who may or may not be able to control him.

[StoneSoup]

This same scenario has played out all over the world, in all cultures, for thousands of years, and every male adult human has memories of either being bullied, or being the bully, or seeing some other big, nasty guy bullying some smaller, gentler guy.

 

You aren't going to want to hear this, but - the only time tested way for the guy being bullied to extract himself from the clutches of the bully is to learn how to fight. It is a cruel, nasty world out there, and to survive reliably, you have to be able to defend yourself. A small, gentle kid doesn't have to become a good enough fighter to beat the big bully - he just needs to transform himself into a tougher target - so that the bullies go pick on easier targets.

 

Otherwise, another way is to simply stand up and take a beating once - because bullies don't take a lot of pleasure in tormenting someone who doesn't react pitifully enough.

 

Variations on this are for him to join a sports team, and really try to contribute - and build camaraderie with teammates - because teammates will normally stick up for each other. Or - learn to run like the wind - away from confrontations..

 

One soft, gentle boy - by himself - is simply a target, waiting to be tormented. It's not fair, it's not good - but that is life. He has to join a group, or harden up - or simply endure humiliation and abuse.

 

You are thinking in terms of one particular bully, at one particular location. But - it never ends. Every boy needs to learn how to stick up for himself. Otherwise, natural selection will tend to remove him from the gene pool.

 

It is normally a father's role to try to instill necessary survival skills into his sons' characters. Lack of a father makes it a lot tougher.

 

Good luck.

SS

[radioman]

[baa99]

You could hire a MT fighter to beat the crap out of the bully.

[Dexi]

Take it to the next level ,ie. make it clear to the parents of the bully that that your sisters child has his families support and you can make life difficult for them if the behaviour doesnt stop....it worked the firxt time,whh not again ?

[bust]

My 2 boys leart martial arts when they were young. The older one had a period where he was being bulied at school. We gave him permission to hit back.

When he injured a boy we instructed him to inform the teachers "you aren't protecting me so I needed to protect myself" Teachers had no response.

I despise bullying.

[Guest]

I know you are all right, he has to have more confidence to take on the bullies around, but it's hard to see my nephew being made unhappy.

 

My boyfriend has said similar to what your saying, and remembers a bully at school that picked on him, until one day in a do or die he lashed out at him. Although the larger boy was sitting on top of him and hitting him in the face, he hit back and managed to hit him a few times. Although my boyfriend ended up the worse with a bloody nose and cut lip, the bully next time they met ignored him from then on.

 

I think the plan is to see the school again, find out where the bully lives and confront him and his parents, and my boyfriend has suggested to enrol my sisters boy into a club where he can learn Muay Thai.

 

I doubt very much if he will ever be a street fighter, but maybe in a group with other boys learning a sport together it might give him added confidence in the future. He might even enjoy it as his self confidence grows, I love to watch Mauy Thai ..... hey I might even go with him and learn myself.

[jitagawn]

Muay Thai is an excellent choice.

Good luck to him...

It will help him ...

[pasathai1]

a swift kick to the nuts usually works

[Flashermac]

Muay Thai is an excellent choice.

Good luck to him...

It will help him ...

 

Students study Muay Thai in primary school. They use it as a form of exercise in the morning before class. However, most of them just go through the motions.