BG thoughts

[jitagawn]

In my opinion, at least in BKK, there is a growing sense of zenophobia (sp?) regarding outsiders(non Thais)-

I think part of this is globalization and part the direction of the current administration.As a friend of mine,a Farang, one of the largest Gem dealers whose family has been here for 60 years says "Thailand is for the Thais" we are just a matter of business with an occasional and rare true friendship.I tend to agree with this.

Reagrding respect I have the following to relate and well this was....just an observation.

I was standing last xmas at the Siam BTS station. awaiting a train to take me back to the river. andover to Klongsan where I live. At the train station I took note of a large Farang man with a signifigant(major) protruding beer belly the bottom of which could be seen popping out from underneath his white tee shirt in SHORT shorts and black socks and sneakers. He was holding a small backpack and was standing with a small(tiny) rather unattractive girl dwarfed by his size who dutifully clutched his hand.She was in my IMHO an obvious BG to those of us that have been here a long time. The looks of the crowd were not ones of respect-Furtive glances and expressions in the train were exchanged.I watched for quite a while and never forgot this scene.They may not say anything but Thais watch and see everything, nintah mahk mahk.

The clincher was that it was a board member I once met in passing.Nonames for sure..:neener:Some Farangs truly look absurd striding around BKK with their rentals and are for sure scorned by the general populace .The truth was I felt sorry for the guy.It seemed sad to me but if this is what makes him happy well each to their own-Flame on no worries.

[JJsushi]

jitagawn said:

Some Farangs truly look absurd striding around BKK with their rentals and are for sure scorned by the general populace .The truth was I felt sorry for the guy.It seemed sad to me but if this is what makes him happy well each to their own-Flame on no worries.

 

The question is that do those farangs really give a shit what the general Thai populace think? Think about it the guy may be on a 2week holiday have a load of cash to burn and in his mind Thailand is a 3rd world Asian bananna republic with an uneducated poor populace. Surely not a group of people one seeks respect from.

[MaiLuk]

>>>there is a growing sense of zenophobia (sp?) regarding outsiders(non Thais)<<<

 

Thou shalt not own land in the LOS

Thou shalt not own a majority share in a business

Shalt not live in LOS unless you have income 10 times the average thai income. From the news: "foreign partners of Thai spouses must deposit 400,000 Baht (£5,700) permanently in a Thai bank or show assured monthly income of at least 40,000 Baht (£570) in order to obtain a renewable one-year visa based on marriage." Seems the powers that be have decided they have no use for farang, unless of course they have gobs of baht.

The word "farang".

Farang are good because you can separate them from their baht.

Mak'em pay double.

Farang smell.

Not clean.

All are pervs and eat their children ::

Well my imagination could go on and on (and yes i'm exaggerating those last few so no need to say "yhais don't think like that idiot!") .

 

Self respect not an issue in this tho I do have bad days.

 

For me all of this stuff is as natural as the day is hot. If you roll into a foreign land like LOS, its OK with me if the locals will not go googly eyed. Because thais don't voice their inner thoughts, it does not follow that one is automatically considered an equal. It may be that the farang who have been indoctrinated with ideas of equality back home are just projecting their thoughts on the thais.

 

Before someone says I'm having a go at the thais, I'm not, and would think it strange if their was not a clique ish type attitude in LOS.

 

Jas: Will people always tell you their true thoughts knowing you are married to/genuinely committed a farang? Do some thais make incorrect assumptions about your marriage? If Noi where you live marries a farang, will the initial reaction from the neighbors be "Oh great joy she found true love?" or will the very first thought that pops into their mind be something else.

[jasmine]

[color:"red"] Some Farangs truly look absurd striding around BKK with their rentals and are for sure scorned by the general populace .The truth was I felt sorry for the guy.It seemed sad to me but if this is what makes him happy well each to their own-Flame on no worries.

[/color]

 

It is true that some of these men are simply obsurd (and please remember I am very partial to Western men). I felt disgusted a couple of times with the way they dressed and behaved. Holding hands in public seems to be accepted now in most parts of Thailand, however, discretion works everywhere, a little old fashion of me. The Thais have always been lookers, more than what I like.

 

Why is it that every typical possible (mind you "possible") BG/punter couple seems to have to hold hands in public, and many of them display inappropriate affection? May be I have been married too long to understand the passion? Or is it really passion?

 

Jasmine

[jasmine]

[color:"red"]Jas: Will people always tell you their true thoughts knowing you are married to/genuinely committed a farang? Do some thais make incorrect assumptions about your marriage? If Noi where you live marries a farang, will the initial reaction from the neighbors be "Oh great joy she found true love?" or will the very first thought that pops into their mind be something else.

 

[/color]

 

Ones need to realize that the Thais know more about BG marrying farangs than a person like me. So typically most of them who have never heard about me would look with wonder. However, a Thai woman's behaviour and speech does show where she is from and many times the level of education (no snob intended). I do not feel that I need to show anything, just being myself. I am sure that many people assume things, so, it does not change what I am.

 

To be married to a farang, my friend, is to have a "gold mine". I normally hear "She is sabai (well off) now, being married to a farang", not much of love ever mentioned. Forget that the Thai woman may have been well-educated and had a sucessful career of her own.

 

However, I have heard things like "He is not fat, he is polite, he is handsome (for an old man)" about Hubby and I am quite proud of him. Of course for an old woman like me to have such a Hubby. The recent statement I heard was though "Such a waste being married to a farang, she does not wear a stitch of gold!" Well, cannot please them all

 

The truth is I am quite sick of these Thais who associate EVERTHING with money

 

Jasmine

[Guest]

>>>The truth is I am quite sick of these Thais who associate EVERTHING with money<<<

 

 

fortunately there's lots around who don't. and the ones who do, well, as long as they keep their thoughts for themselves and their gossip to where we can't hear it - fine. but as soon as it intrudes into our privacy, there will be problems... ::

[Guest]

Why is it that every typical possible (mind you "possible") BG/punter couple seems to have to hold hands in public, and many of them display inappropriate affection?

 

I agree, but the strange thing in my experience is the BG's initiate holding hands as well as other slightly more public displays of affection. I usually don't feel comfortable with it and will dissuade them from doing it. BG's are proud to buck the trend in conservative dress so maybe just an extension of their attitudes to traditional values. BG's do seem to be setting the trend as the number of tattoos, spagetti tops, low cut pants, blonde hair, smoking, drinking, and so forth is more and more noticeable outside the BG scene.

[Guest]

Hi Escape Rabbit,

 

I gotta agree here. From day one I was always sensitive to public displays of affection in Thailand. It was always the B/G who initiated, and I also never felt comfortable with that.

 

But in saying that, my g/f often tells me one of the things she misses most, is holding my hand on the BTS, and while walking around town. It would seem things in this respect are/have changed very quickly there, in the last couple of years. I've been coming there for only 5 years, but have noticed a very Western adaptation, at least in Bangkok. I'm sure other outlaying area's are much slower to adapt, if at all yet. But there is no question things have changed in BKK proper, in the last half decade. And I'm speaking of young Thai couples, not just bg/farang. Holding hands is just not the obscene/taboo public display it once was anymore.

 

Groping, and passionate kisses are still concidered bad taste in public, IMO, but hand holding seems to be pretty much acceptable these days.

 

Times are a'changin' there, to be sure.

 

HT

[Guest]

and the respect question...

 

well, just being farang do we have any right to demand any special respect?

 

problem is, lets face it, lots of farang here are very in your face by doing everything that we as a whole can not really demand too much respect.

the general opinion of many thais on farang as a whole is that we are rich, ignorant, sex-obsessed and have not much sense for propriarity. the history of sextourism, and blatant in your face scenes in public places unfortunately has brought the burden of proof for us who live here (and care about being respected, need to have face to be able to deal within the society).

i often have to battle those misconceptions and generalisations about us farang in thai only settings. it's a pain in the arse, but i am not that blind, i realise that they are not completely out of the blue (a few of the threads here in this board somewhat prove my point here ).

mostly it does take not that much time to overcome such stereotypes (a large part of it is that i discuss/debate those issues in thai). sometimes unfortunately i can't, and it develops into a battle of faces. i am not a nice person in such a situation, because i fully understand the importance of trying not to lose face.

 

well, respect, or better, face in this context, is something which everybody has to build up over a long period of time, and especially important for us farang. one does not get that by being nice and smily.

without local family, and/or a supporting peergroup nobody is anything here, that counts equally for thai and farang, and in times of conflict you will inevitably lose. respect/face has to be earned, takes a long time, but is possible.

 

expecting face/respect just because one has...white skin (?), or money is very foolish, especially while publically exchanging signs of their love with their recent barfine, and embarassing the shit out of everyone around (ever see on the sky train how normal people desperately try not to notice public young love between an oldish farang and a bargirl half his age?).

 

some people obviously don't care much about that as they are just on a holiday, or the their main reason of existence here is their second or third spring. fine, but they should not expect to receive any respect here - neither by their "girlfriends" who basically are just professionally involved, nor by the mainstream population (not saying that many thais don't take advantage of the endless possibilities to get laid here, but there is something like discreet behaviour, keeping up appearances, a sense of proprarity).

 

nothing comes from nothing, and an increase in unfriendly behavior towards farang is not only related to the presently xenophobic government, our behavior is at least as much responsible, especially in interpersonal situations.

[pattaya127]

Some Farangs truly look absurd striding around BKK with their rentals and are for sure scorned by the general populace

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first, i see no xenophobia there (not at you, Jit, just responding to claims of daily routinexenophobia), just lack of respect that even some farangs can feel towards the "fat slob" just like any thais. I mean, do you guys really think that farangs do not scorn sex tourists or even other tourists?

 

The forum is full of such scorn, dislike of certain spots in Pattaya or BKK for their obvious not "la creme de la creme" farang population.

 

The funny thing is, a farang with his wife is also mocked, as of course, it is absolutely certain (smirk!) he only wishes to drop the wife for a little thai girl and feels sorry for himself.

 

So, I guess nanaP can be a xenophobic forum too, then, with very little respect given to tourists. Just remembering the defensive stance from residents when the "expat or not" debate came on.

 

A few certainly took the pain to differentiate themselves from the usual and simple definitions for farangs, and of course from the farang population at large, by insisting on many subdivisions, that 99% thais can't care less about, truly (and me too.... :: again).

 

 

 

 

Mailuk:

Thou shalt not ..........

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what does laws and regulations made by a 3rd world political elite have to do with the generation population of that country, such as you meet every day?

 

i think the question is very simple: Do you feel like a victim when staying/living in LOS? yes, and discriminated routinely? Ok, find another country. Life is too short for such abuses.

 

Every country has its cultural racism and prejudices, I think farangs are the least victimized, when it comes to routinely victimized people in Thailand. And for those truly victimized (hilltribes, burmese refugees, issan laborers, spoliated small land owners), it's not that easy to just take a plane back home, or forget it all by having a sex crazed "happy happy" vacation amidst a xenophobic climate.........