thai3 Posted April 10, 2005 Report Share Posted April 10, 2005 I introduced my GF to a long time friend, both are about the same age, the GF was a bit annoyed that my friend who is older addressed her as pi. The GF complained that the friend was looking her 'up and down' and I could tell she did not like her. Now I get an email from long time friend whose opinion I have a lot of time for who wrote: 'But let me tell you about your girl,i don't like her dear,and she make her self like she are very best one,and many thing she say i don't like,i don't think she are the good one for you.So if you want a good wife i can find for you dear,and i can find some one to be good take care and be very love for you dear.I see so many thing in her,but i can not say right now.Anyway she not a good girl for you dear belive me' How can they tell so much about each other from a 30 minute meeting? To me everything seemed quite friendly and went well so I was a bit surprised at these reactions esp the email.My friend is married already so not jealousy. I had similar reactions when I introduced the now GF to the last GF, we went out together and everything seemed OK but they hated each other as well????? I think the GF comes across as quite confident, has a degree and in comparison to the others earns more, both the others were at one time BG's if only breifly so is it a case of them made to feel inferior in some way?-peter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Hippie Posted April 10, 2005 Report Share Posted April 10, 2005 This is typical in many female relationships...caddyness (or is it Cattyness?). One friend I know has a wife, nice lady, she and his friend's wife don't seem to get along very well either, they refer to it as "queen bee syndrome" (forget how to say it in Thai). It seems to me, the first one in a group to hurl insults at a woman, is almost always another woman. Perhapes secretly, your "friend" really wants you! And perhapes, your "GF" fears this...good luck! Edited to add, my Thai teacher here says one of the most difficult parts of Thai culture, mainly for women, is finding out who is "Pi" in a first meeting situation. She says it can be difficult, and often set the tone for a future relationship/interaction with that person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thai3 Posted April 10, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 10, 2005 Although the friend is married she is bi and likes women more than men so I thought she might like the GF. Come to think of it I once met the friend for a meal when I had a BG from wash sq in tow. The sq gal sat there with a face like thunder the whole time miserable as sin and only lightened up when we left. One of the biggest mysteries to me is always how thais interact and thier opinions of each other-peter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Hippie Posted April 10, 2005 Report Share Posted April 10, 2005 My guess is, each girl feels threatened by the other...sounds like "queen bee syndrome" to me. Just accept that they are women, and don't try to figure it all out... doing so will make you crazy! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jitagawn Posted April 11, 2005 Report Share Posted April 11, 2005 Typical female competitive Darwinian behavior.Pay no attention.Their silly little games... Forward march Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gummigut Posted April 11, 2005 Report Share Posted April 11, 2005 I recently had this happen. In my instance, I certainly don't put it down to cattiness. One girl was using forceful language and then started being condescending. That's just obnoxious. My friend put up with it because she was better educated and understood where the other woman was coming from, but she wasn't happy and neither was I. This is where knowing Thai really makes a difference. Word choice makes a big impact on first encounters like this. Even with my limited Thai I knew something was wrong. My farang friend, who doesn't speak thai, who was there thought things went well and everything was friendly. <<burp>> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thai3 Posted April 11, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 11, 2005 Thai is not much use when they are talking Lao :: seems they were both very pleasant to each other while thinking the opposite of what they were saying. GF says they are not same class or education, I take her word for it-peter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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