why farang like to get bar girls to be wife?

[Guest lazyphil]

OK...I know i'm a bit slow!!

[Guest]

quote:

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Originally posted by funny:

don't forget you can take the girl out of the bar but....you cannot take A BAR out of the girl.... hope this is easy for thinking..,

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funny,

First of all I want to thank you for sharing your point of view on this board. It's nice to have different perspectives.

"don't forget you can take the girl out of the bar but....you cannot take A BAR out of the girl.... "

This is kind of a mantra among many 'sanukers'. It's got a nice ring to it, but that doesn't make it true. It implies that once a women has worked in a bar she is somehow forever changed, the bar has left an indelible mark on her, and she has lost any good qualities she may have had before.

funny, it seems mostly you think bar girls don't make good wifes because they are not educated and have work skills. But that could be said for almost all girls from poor familys, bar girls or not. What do you think of farang who marry poor girls from Issan that have never worked in a bar?

I think some farang actually are attracted to bar girls (and many thai girls) for exactly the reason that they do not have ambitions of being the man's equal, working in an office, having the aspirations of a 'modern' woman. They are more traditional, or at least seemingly so.

[JJsushi]

quote:

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Originally posted by lazyphil:

Old hippie

Sometimes I wish I could have the balls to tell everyone that 'yeah my wife worked a bar in Patong', it's not healthy to keep it all hush hush??

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It's not that you don't have the balls my friend. It is that most people don't have an open mind to understand before they judge.

[Old Hippie]

Originally posted by lazyphil:

Old hippie

Sometimes I wish I could have the balls to tell everyone that 'yeah my wife worked a bar in Patong', it's not healthy to keep it all hush hush??

quote:

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Originally posted by jjsushi:

It's not that you don't have the balls my friend. It is that most people don't have an open mind to understand before they judge.

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It is sort of funny when you think about it, so many people will go to church, preach forgivness, love thy neighbor etc...but they never really practice that now do they? Yet, the man many worship in church every Sunday also was known to covort with "BGs" as well. We have the balls to open ourselves up, and put ourselves out to society's ridicule and (mis)judgements, yet they don't have the balls to accept that.

Here are a few return lines I use when people start to cast the stereotype: (people have actually said these to me):

Q)"What bar does she whore at?" A) "Same one your mother does"

Q)"Is/was she a hooker?" A) "Yes, she saw how well your mother and sister did and decided to follow suit..."

Q) (a girl asked me this one, with a really bitchy tone) "How much did she cost you?" A) "A lot less than your boyfriend pays for you, it's all the same..."

I find when you do this, the assholes get really pissed, and say "don't talk about my mother/sister/GF etc..." To wit I reply well now you know how I feel everytime some asshole talks about my wife. Usually this will get them out of your face. I figure they drew "fisrt blood" so to speak, and thus all is fair to end the "fight." These people are out to hurt you and try to destroy what you have, if you give them a taste of it, they will back off.

[Guest]

"don't forget you can take the girl out of the bar but....you cannot take A BAR out of the girl.... "

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isn?t that part of the mix why we were so attracted to them in the first place. We buy a solution but it comes with a higher price and more problems than we care to admit. And if we could take the bar out of her what are we left with? Someone mentioned away back the reasons we?re attracted to them don?t necessarily make the right reasons to marry them, (if you feel you have to). I felt I had to 3x then I woke up. can?t see much point in marring them at all really unless you want to get their arses back to your own country. We pay a pretty penny to give our freedom away. Sooner (less expensive) or later (more expensive) we get over it and move along to something more interesting, mysterious, dangerous etc.. if we can project our relationships ahead a few years and imagine the different scenarios they might turn into we might think twice, if we could master our feelings properly. What are the odds? Pretty risky when you think about it.