BG’s traveling with farang in LOS

[Guest]

Sorry to spoil some of your myths but educated Thais can in fact (with some exceptions of course) identify a bargirl fairly easily. It is not much different from back home. I can get a good sense of the level of a persons education and background just by listening to them speak combined with their dress and demeanear.

An uneducated bargirl generally does not talk, dress or act like an educated girl with a more normal job. Since most are from Issan the accent is another clue. When seen with a farang this girl is easily identified.

"What about an educated bargirl" you might ask. I don't really know the answer to that one because I have not really met many of those.

Regarding hanging out with a bargirl for a week or even a day or two. How do you guys do it??? Usually I can't communicate with them in any depth at all due to the language, cultural, education barriers. They are fun for a night and then I want them out of my room. I don't even feel comfortable sitting down and eating with them before/after. I see lots of farangs hanging around with their girls and saying absolutely nothing to each other or trying in vain to communicate some mundane unimportant thought. Often the girls are staring off into space looking bored to death. I sure would like to know how you guys do it. I would like to try at a 1 week relationship but in the maybe 50 or so women I've had in the LOS within the last couple of years I have yet to find one that I would feel comfortable with for that length of time. Even with the ones who spoke decent english, had a great personality, and really turned me on I still felt uncomfortable at the thought of sitting around in restaurants, malls and other public areas.

[ September 22, 2001: Message edited by: Alfalfa ]

[Guest]

Originally posted by Alfalfa:

'Sorry to spoil some of your myths but educated Thais can in fact (with some exceptions of course) identify a bargirl fairly easily.'

Spot on. They usually can tell them from a mile away, and so can most long-time expats. Sorry, but I sometimes cringe at the "calibre" of Thai women that many farang hang out with; so do most Thais. Many Thais ask me why farang always go after ugly and dumb country pumpkins. In turn, the farang with these women are looked down upon, or at least regarded as "inferior farang material" (farang kee-nok).

[Guest]

Alfalfa

 

re: your remark on Isaan accent

This is bullshit. Isaan accent has nothing to do with this or are you implying that educated women from isaan seen with a farang are hookers ?. It is only the way that the girl dress and behave in public places.

There is a lot of discrimination between the BKK Thais and the Isaan Thais and you will even find this back in a lesser extend in Thai communities overseas.

I was a while ago in a bank in Nakon Sawan and a very young girl came in with a farang, approximately 35 years or more her senior and she wears a dress that barely covers her ass. She went to the bank counter asking for the latest exchange rates and start shouting at her man that the exchange rates in Pattaya are better.

Well, she got her attention and this farang (who now’s he might be on this board) appears to be very proud that everyone including myself was looking at the girl.

[pattaya127]

Alfala, Scum

If we cared what middle-class thais (about as idiotic and philistine as any B/G,IMO, except as to the content of their wallet. Ie. how many times did you have a worldly or well thought-out discussion with any thai?) think, we'd never have any G/F in LOS. I've been with some pretty liberated middle-class thai girls and i can assure you they attracted a little more attention than little Issan friends. I also am of the opinion that a pretty girl is always pretty. My 2 thai friends in SF, wealthy guys, are always envious when i show them pixes of my last trip. What they mean, by looking down, is that the girl is below their own status, and it would be unappropriate to be seen with her by their friends or family. Typical middle-class behaviour: but their problem, not mine. As to male desires, thai guys know a pretty girl when they see one, no matter where she is from and how brown she is. as to working girls only S/T material, I disagree: I learnt a lot from Issan and working girls, it's just stuff that does not always ask for translation. Once again, you get back what you put in it.

Last, if it's so easy to tell a working girl from an "honest" girl, how come the latter always feel self-conscious about dating a farang without bringing 1 or 2 friends? Not always, but quite often. My take is that thais mostly frown upon any open manifestation of intimacy, or contrast between a fat/old farang seen with a young girl. I do too, BTW.... Not about morals, but esthetics. LOL

[ September 23, 2001: Message edited by: pattaya127 ]

[Guest]

Regarding hanging out with a bargirl for a week or even a day or two. How do you guys do it??? Usually I can't communicate with them in any depth at all due to the language, cultural, education barriers. They are fun for a night and then I want them out of my room. I don't even feel comfortable sitting down and eating with them before/after. I see lots of farangs hanging around with their girls and saying absolutely nothing to each other or trying in vain to communicate some mundane unimportant thought. Often the girls are staring off into space looking bored to death. I sure would like to know how you guys do it. I would like to try at a 1 week relationship but in the maybe 50 or so women I've had in the LOS within the last couple of years I have yet to find one that I would feel comfortable with for that length of time. Even with the ones who spoke decent english, had a great personality, and really turned me on I still felt uncomfortable at the thought of sitting around in restaurants, malls and other public areas.

 

Sorry for quoting such a lot from a previous post but 2 observations:

1. Is it really so different in farangland - it wasn't for me on a lot of occasions !

2. What is the age difference - I'm 39 and I don't think I have much in common with a 2* farang lady as a right unless there are other factors.

Austen

[Guest]

Originally posted by pattaya127:

"Last, if it's so easy to tell a working girl from an "honest" girl, how come the latter always feel self-conscious about dating a farang without bringing 1 or 2 friends?"

These days, educated, "regular" women in Bangkok aren't afraid of being taken for a hooker when in the presence of a farang. They're self-confident enough. It used to be markedly different 10 or 15 years ago; they were absolutely petrified of being seen with one.

Thai women take their friends along for the first date as a kind of protection squad, as psychological and physical support. They don't want to be alone with the guy when they don't know if he might start acting funny. After one or two dates like this, they're usually OK and from then it'll be a one-on-one.

On the other hand, bar-girls know that society recognises them as what they are and it often gives them a deep inferiority complex. Why do you think so many of them wear ostentaious gold jewellery? It's their (not very clever) way of trying to look "hi-so". Of course, it doesn't work and they rather look pathetic with all that stuff. It makes them stand out negatively even more.

As for learning something from bar-girls - hell, I can even learn something from watching a tree! Of course, you can learn something about Isaan village life from these women, but that subject will be exhausted pretty quickly. And there will be not much intellectual stimulation thereafter.

[ September 23, 2001: Message edited by: Scum_Baggio ]

[thalenoi]

quote:

---

Originally posted by Alfalfa:

They are fun for a night and then I want them out of my room. I don't even feel comfortable sitting down and eating with them before/after[ September 22, 2001: Message edited by: Alfalfa ]

---

Alfalfa,

Too bad for you. I hope you have other interests in Thailand besides f**cking.

I, for one, feel very comfortable sitting down and eatingwith them. Probably not worthwile trying to explain you why, you would not be able to understand. Not feeling sorry neither.

[Guest]

Thalenoi,

How about enlightening me with your logic even though I am obviously not capable of understanding such a lofty subject.

I guess the fact I now find most bargirls uninteresting for anything other than sex is my achilles heel. I guess I am doomed to be stuck in the culturally limiting area of social interaction with middle class educated Thai society just like back in the motherland. Then there were all those cultural trips to the outer reaches of Thailand and around Cambodia. Now I realize I should have taken a bargirl with me so she could sit in the hotel room and watch the cartoon network and MTV in between our shagging. I feel so empty :-(

[pattaya127]

]

I don't know about your experience with working girls. Seems pretty drab. I never had this problem with my G/Fs, of feeling inferior, or wearing gold and they would laugh at the mention that "Thai Society" is looking down at them. So what? They would say, I take care my family, I love my king, my Buddha, why they hate me? Because i come from poor family? Maybe one day, these people become poor too, what they do for family then?.

Frankly, I never had much esteem for this kind of seemingly properly-behaved middle-class, what have they brought to the world, except of being born a little luckier? Moreover, they'll never know how i can myself look down on them, if that's the game, and I can: every damned comfort they got came from my side of the world. On the other hand, the few better-off thais i know are not that judgemental, so maybe we meet different people, you and I. I am not sure what was the point of the thread and what was so important about what Thai Society thinks of farangs and Issan brownies. My point to them is simple: I couldn't give a shit! And i'm glad the thai g/fs i meet do the same.

PS: about learning, watching a tree, tell me about something you learnt from a middle-class thai that relates more than just about how thais behave in society (as you can learn that being with any thai). Something that was really meaningful to your life, that showed you how some things are more important than others. I learnt that from a few working girls, and the fact i was able to see them as women, not just whores, may have helped a bit, but i am not sure you understand what i am trying to say.

As to thai women being self-confident to date farangs as they please, really? Well, then, they finally caught up with their "working" sisters. Bravo! Not a minute too soon.

[ September 23, 2001: Message edited by: pattaya127 ]

[pattaya127]

I think we need to be a little less disingenuous about this discussion. Obviously, Thalenoi and I are not talking about the same things as others. I still doubt that most guys came to live in LOS and love the country because of the inter-action with the middle-class there. Thailand's social strata is still a lot richer than that, and the special feel we have about being there has very little to do with being able to share a few fluent english ot thai sentences with those thais who can reciprocate it. As for the trips across the borders to Cambodia,Laos or Burma, I do not think many thais,not just bar girls, would be able to do it with the awe in the eyes that I have visiting them. Most really wonder what we find in these poor countries, and they'd rather limit themselves to business day-trips or 2-day guided tours of Angkor Wat, with family pictures in front of the Bayon. Fascinating....

I also find it ironic that after all the white-woman bashing on a board like this one, some bring back the value of being able to talk with middle-class women. I am afraid my attention span may last just a little before i see the aura of PC-ness and propriety sneaking its cutie little (thai this time) nose out. Why don't we make it a person by person issue, bar girls or high executives, a lot more sensical in my view.