Bangkoktraveler Posted December 18, 2010 Report Share Posted December 18, 2010 According to my sourses, Homeland Security plans on taking down the largest International criminal in the world on December 25, 2010. This criminal has worked for years out of many countries, going as he pleases without even a passport. With no visible means of income, he displays his wealth like a burgular does as he runs away from his victim's homes carrying a knapsack full of his questionable goods. The plan is to take this criminal down along with his whole entire network. From reliable sourses it is alleged that this mastermind has a large slave populace working for him. When he is not overseaing his slave labors, he spends his time diddling with minors. He has a fascination at looking at children when they are sleeping and does this without the parents permission. This criminal, if you should see or hear about him goes by the name Santa Claus. He also has other aliases. Merry Christmas! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TroyinEwa/Perv Posted December 18, 2010 Report Share Posted December 18, 2010 As usual, the government is lying. There is no Santa Claus. My father told me when I was young that he shot him dead. Hasn't been a real Santa for 35 years or more. I think the guy that is subbing for him came from Mexico. The North Pole has no laws on illegal immigration yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LizardKing Posted December 18, 2010 Report Share Posted December 18, 2010 Santa's a Mexican drug addict! "...well man, he had some magic dust. He gave a little to the reindeer, and a little to Santa Claus. And a little bit more to Santa Claus..." sbw9-uq9sMU Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bangkoktraveler Posted December 19, 2010 Author Report Share Posted December 19, 2010 As usual, the government is lying. There is no Santa Claus. My father told me when I was young that he shot him dead. Hasn't been a real Santa for 35 years or more. I think the guy that is subbing for him came from Mexico. The North Pole has no laws on illegal immigration yet. Next you are going to tell me that Bin Laden has been dead for 15 years and the boogey man really doesn't exist. One of the other charges they want to nail his willy ass with is that he has been spreading 'good cheer' around which seems to imply he might be bootlegging booze. The GOP is trying to pass thru Congress permission to install a battery of big guns along the Mexican border and shoot his damn ass right out of the sky. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TroyinEwa/Perv Posted December 19, 2010 Report Share Posted December 19, 2010 That is true...they do want to put the guns on the Mexican border but since the new guy is a Mexican illegal immigrant, he is beloved in Mexico and they won't allow the guns to be put there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eyebee Posted December 19, 2010 Report Share Posted December 19, 2010 Also be on the lookout for the following people: Emma Dreaming Arthur White Chris Muss Jess Like-Dee Juan Zwee Hugh Sterno Wendy Treetops-Glissen Anne Chilled-Wren Liz-Anne “Two Ears†Laybelle Cindy Snow Emma Dreaming Arthur White Chris Musswit Avery Crease Miss Carr Di Wright Mayor Dazeby Mary Anne Bright Anna-May Hall-York-Rhys Mrs B White All armed and extremely dangerous... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unit731 Posted December 19, 2010 Report Share Posted December 19, 2010 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bangkoktraveler Posted December 20, 2010 Author Report Share Posted December 20, 2010 Santa Claus can't even be in the USA because he doesn't have a passport and furthermore, he can't get one. He has no sourse of income and some say he was born in Cuba but his Cuban passport is not an original. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flashermac Posted December 21, 2010 Report Share Posted December 21, 2010 Nonsense! Santa Claus is a native born American from the Hudson River valley. And he'll get the grope down just like every other American (except those wearing burkhas or kheffiyahs). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gobbledonk Posted December 21, 2010 Report Share Posted December 21, 2010 This thread is almost as sad as the time I went to Jakarta to 'escape Christmas'. You can imagine my joy when I found that they embraced the whole 'lets go shopping' side of it and I still had to endure the commercialisation. About the only time I have really escaped it was this time last year when I holed up in a hotel in Ipoh - bliss. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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