Your Morning Routine?

[The_Munchmaster]

We all have to get up every morning and we probably all have a routine that we regularly follow every time we do.

 

Is that routine a quick, shit, shower and shave or do we spend a bit more time on ourselves before heading out to a days work or whatever it is we are doing?

 

Me, I believe in taking care of myself, in a balanced diet, in a rigorous exercise routine.

 

In the morning, if my face is a little puffy, I'll put on an ice pack while doing my stomach crunches. I can do a thousand now.

 

After I remove the icepack, I use a deep pore-cleanser lotion.

 

In the shower, I use a water-activated gel cleanser, then a honey-almond body scrub and on my face an exfoliating gel scrub.

 

Then I apply an herb mint facial masque which I leave on for ten minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine.

 

I always use an after-shave lotion with little or no alcohol because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older.

 

Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm, followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.

 

And that's it. I know it takes a bit of time but it's worth it.

 

How's about you guys?

[Guest lazyphil]

posting bollocks here!!!!

[acockasian]

 

Is that routine a quick, shit, shower and shave or do we spend a bit more time on ourselves before heading out to ....

 

 

I often wank in the morning if thats what you mean by spend time on ourselves.

[Mekong]

Why do women rub their eyes when they wake up in the morning?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

They have no balls to scratch!

[panadolsandwich]

We all have to get up every morning and we probably all have a routine that we regularly follow every time we do.

 

Is that routine a quick, shit, shower and shave or do we spend a bit more time on ourselves before heading out to a days work or whatever it is we are doing?

 

Me, I believe in taking care of myself, in a balanced diet, in a rigorous exercise routine.

 

In the morning, if my face is a little puffy, I'll put on an ice pack while doing my stomach crunches. I can do a thousand now.

 

After I remove the icepack, I use a deep pore-cleanser lotion.

 

In the shower, I use a water-activated gel cleanser, then a honey-almond body scrub and on my face an exfoliating gel scrub.

 

Then I apply an herb mint facial masque which I leave on for ten minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine.

 

I always use an after-shave lotion with little or no alcohol because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older.

 

Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm, followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.

 

And that's it. I know it takes a bit of time but it's worth it.

 

How's about you guys?

 

Sounds disturbingly like Patrick Bateman in American Psycho, but I approve - yes I do. Not sure if you're familiar with the book but here is a memorable quote:

 

Patrick Bateman: Harold, it's Bateman, Patrick Bateman. You're my lawyer so I think you should know: I've killed a lot of people. Some girls in the apartment uptown uh, some homeless people maybe 5 or 10 um an NYU girl I met in Central Park. I left her in a parking lot behind some donut shop. I killed Bethany, my old girlfriend, with a nail gun, and some man uh some old faggot with a dog last week. I killed another girl with a chainsaw, I had to, she almost got away and uh someone else there I can't remember maybe a model, but she's dead too. And Paul Allen. I killed Paul Allen with an axe in the face, his body is dissolving in a bathtub in Hell's Kitchen. I don't want to leave anything out here. I guess I've killed maybe 20 people, maybe 40. I have tapes of a lot of it, uh some of the girls have seen the tapes. I even, um... I ate some of their brains, and I tried to cook a little. Tonight I, uh, I just had to kill a LOT of people. And I'm not sure I'm gonna get away with it this time. I guess I'll uh, I mean, ah, I guess I'm a pretty uh, I mean I guess I'm a pretty sick guy. So, if you get back tomorrow, I may show up at Harry's Bar, so you know, keep your eyes open.

 

How would you like that message on your answer loop?

 

But yeah to answer your question in a straight forward way I like to run on the beach maybe 8 miles or so just like a kid again. Then I swim back. I like to enter the iron man competition every other year so this keeps me in shape. Back in the bathroom I have three dusky maidens prepare my - I wish... lol.

[barkley]

I read the Tibetan book of the dead in its entirety every morning before 5am. Then I strap on a backpack stuffed with 18 sandbags filled with concrete, and wearing nothing but speedos do a 25k sprint.

 

After I eat a brisk breakfast of corn gruel and tree bark, and then I don a blindfold and take my Unicycle for a 50km joyride through the back sois of Bangkok while listening to to Rachmaninoff's Rhapsody on a Theme of Paganini.

 

Finally before I start the day, it's time for a dip in the Klong.

[The_Munchmaster]

Sounds disturbingly like Patrick Bateman in American Psycho, but I approve - yes I do...

 

Well done, I wondered when or if someone would recognize Patrick Batemans routine from American Psycho (a fantastic film full of great quotes).

 

So as LP said, it's bollocks. A shit, shower and shave (and a brush of the tooths) for me, just the same as almost every other bloke.

[panadolsandwich]

I read the Tibetan book of the dead in its entirety every morning before 5am. Then I strap on a backpack stuffed with 18 sandbags filled with concrete, and wearing nothing but speedos do a 25k sprint.

 

After I eat a brisk breakfast of corn gruel and tree bark, and then I don a blindfold and take my Unicycle for a 50km joyride through the back sois of Bangkok while listening to to Rachmaninoff's Rhapsody on a Theme of Paganini.

 

Finally before I start the day, it's time for a dip in the Klong.

 

Brilliant. Reminds me a bit of that monty python sketch:

 

[panadolsandwich]

Well done, I wondered when or if someone would recognize Patrick Batemans routine from American Psycho (a fantastic film full of great quotes).

 

So as LP said, it's bollocks. A shit, shower and shave (and a brush of the tooths) for me, just the same as almost every other bloke.

 

Whoops sorry to spoil the fun so soon. I believe it's called a triple S.

[panadolsandwich]

Forgot to add if you are hangover then you do a triple S, followed by Shag and Shandy. So in fact the five S theory. Or Hahahahaha. And remember there is no embarrasment that can't be got over by drowning a few jars with the lads in the morn. All sound advise hark thee.