Guest Posted February 9, 2003 Report Share Posted February 9, 2003 BUT nobody ever (exeptions noted) admits their booze problem Could it be because they don't know they have one? At least that's what I hear is common. Someone told me the definition of being an alcoholic has nothing to do with how much you drink, when, or what circumstances, but comes down to the answer to the question: is it destructive? Is this true? I've followed this thread closely because my drinking is way up since coming to LOS. Before LOS, I might have had 2-3 beers at most one night a week. After LOS, I am at around 10 drinks a night 3 times a week, but I enjoy it, look forward to it, and it often gives good experiences to look back on. I can't yet see ways it is destructive, but don't really know what to look for. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 9, 2003 Report Share Posted February 9, 2003 Could it be because they don't know they have one? That, and the more common, " I don't have a drinking problem" syndrome. There are several "accepted" definitions of being an alcoholic, form the AMA to AA to whatever the latest grant receiving agency proposes. Truth is simplw. If you control it and there are no ill side effects to yourself or others, then go for it. On the other hand if it controls you......someone will be the boss...and it will generally win. Some have to stop completely, forever to be in control, others can make compremises and function well. Each individual is different. No doubt LOS has a deliterious effect on many that come here. Tread causiously and wisely. Make conscious efforts to spend some time with non imbibers here in LOS, they too have fun. Only you can prevent bears, light a forest fire today. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fiery Jack Posted February 10, 2003 Report Share Posted February 10, 2003 OH, Our 'problems' sound very alike. I think it's good to remember that diagnosis depends on which doctor you consult as well. When I became worried about my tippling, in the space of less than two weeks, I saw 3 different doctors (all Japanese), one who said 'Your liver's fine for a man of your age. You obviously drink, I can tell that, but there's nothing to worry about as long as you don't let it escalate out of control, keep it at the level you're at now...'; a second one who said (along the lines you got), 'You're not an alcoholic but you do abuse alcohol. You're what's called a binge drinker, which is actually worse for your health. Try to address the problems in your life that cause you to go on these cowardly escapist binges. Try to have a small drink every day rather than holding off for a few days then going mad...'; and the third who was the 'You're an alcoholic, you're going to die...' scaremonger. These dudes were all looking at the same customer and the same blood test results. Go figure . At the time, being scared and in denial, I ran with the first gentle diagnosis , kept the second on the back burner and ignored the third one, in fact got quite angry with him and more or less fled his consulting rooms calling him an asshole . I've since learned that he (No. 3, who was by far the youngest and most 'with it' of the trio) actually spent a lot of time in the States working with fledgling and hardcore alcoholics and has written a book on the subject of the progression from social drinker to 'lost everything: currently residing in a skip' alcoholic wino, whereas the other two, knowledgeable though they were, were not proper specialists in the area of alcoholism. In hindsight, I realise what No. 3 was doing - trying to scare me off the sauce, basically, using strongarm tactics to do so. No. 2 was probably nearest the truth, and No. 1 was a bit too softly-softly, I reckon. That was a few years ago. Since then, I drink less rather than more. I've actually managed to get to that pleasant plateau where I can have one beer with dinner and NOT want to carry on and have another 10. Having a good woman has definitely helped (it was when my marriage was going down the pan that I really started tanning the bottle in hard: I'm much happier now, so don't need an emotional prop so much). However, the binges, if binges they be, never seem to stop. In fact, I consciously look forward to them: three days off work, girlfriend out of town, and that's me straight to the nearest bar, acting the chimpanzee and belting the beer back like there's a shortage of the stuff . I always regret these intemperate shenanigans (usually occurring about once every 6 weeks) afterwards, but only until the hangover wears off. Then I start looking forward to the next 'jag'. And, as I say, in terms of quantity, I certainly drink far less, be it on a single evening or taken as an average over a month or two, than I did 10, even 5 years ago. I've never hurt anyone yet, only myself, and never been in 'serious' trouble: I just act like a 3 year-old asshole when I'm drunk. Not as big an asshole as I did a few years ago, but I'm still in the general playpen. Some people act like assholes when they're sober. I don't, so at least I have that for comfort. My girlfriend says I'm just 'boring' when I'm drunk because I repeat the same uninteresting things over and over and over again. Hey, most of the women I've ever met must've been drunk . I think the general sway of advice you're getting from other members is on the button. As long as you remember that you're the boss, and keep a lid on it, you'll be okay. I wonder what people did before the term 'alcoholic' was coined? Just drank and were happy, I suppose. Cheers. Mine's a large one. Jack :: :: ad infinitum Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 23, 2003 Report Share Posted February 23, 2003 I've not been on the board for a while, and have just noticed this thread. I too applaud those who've "come out" here (Old Hippie, Firey Jack and LaoHuLi) and come clean about their battles with drink . But I also CANNOT believe that there are not more people on this board who fit a fairly standard "alcoholic" profile. When I started reading this thread I thought "Great, a forum where we can anonymously confess our booze-related troubles..." but it didn't happen, did it? Lots of you in denial out there, huh ? Personally, I had a big drink problem some years ago which culminated in me losing my job because I fucked up big style at a high-power business meeting in front of my Bosses due to being inebriated after a liquid lunch. I also lost the woman I intended to spend the rest of my life with because she got sick of my childish lies, secret drinking and erratic behavior . A decade down the road, boozing's still a big part of my life, but it's no longer out of control. I still drink far too much by most people's standards but, like FJ and OH, it's more "binge" drinking than chronic alcoholism i.e. I can go weeks with no drink but somehow always end up on a mad bender about once a month. And I have regular medical checks and everything seems to be in perfect working order (except my trouser snake, on occasion: see my "blood in spunk/discharge") posts last year ). Not that I'm an obnoxious drunk: my current ladyfriend encourages me to drink because, she says, I'm dull when I'm sober (my kind of woman ). I've found reading this thread (and posting this) very theraputic. I'm sure there must be more board members who've succumbed a bit too easily to the bottle at one time or another, and I hope some of them will "come out" and post. Well that's my 5 baht's worth. OH, how are you getting on with the detox? Or have you slid off the wagon again? Either way, best of luck. VD :: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
check_bin_krap Posted February 23, 2003 Report Share Posted February 23, 2003 "But I also CANNOT believe that there are not more people on this board who fit a fairly standard "alcoholic" profile. When I started reading this thread I thought "Great, a forum where we can anonymously confess our booze-related troubles..." but it didn't happen, did it? Lots of you in denial out there, huh ?" .................................................................... I don't agree at all! People handle their problems differently, and not all see the use in declaring this stuff on a public board. What works for one might not work for another. Cheers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 23, 2003 Report Share Posted February 23, 2003 I like this thread, sometimes it can get a bit lonely thinking your on your own drinking, when you in fact know there are plenty others out there. I was bought up with drinking being acceptable by my parents, but decided that other substances were a better thing. I changed my mind about that, only to find the drink was the thing to take my thoughts away from the other stuff. I drink 6 out of 7 days now. Usually about 6-8 drinks a day, it IS causing problems with family, freinds etc, but I realise this & am taking steps to hopefully get things a bit more under contr, though as everyone notes it aint easy, and it isnt. In the past I did bad stuff when drunk in public so now I only ever drink alone, often when on the net & often when on this board ( actiually I ALWAYS drink when on this board ) . I think drink will always be a part of my life, but I dont want it to destroy my life, so I talk to the pros etc, I dont see AA as an answer as I dont necessarily agree with all that stuff. This is just my story, yours made me feel good that I am not alone, hope mine somehow has a similiar effect. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 23, 2003 Report Share Posted February 23, 2003 As you seek to address your situation do keep in mind that you are confronting a medical problem of addiction rather than a moral shortcoming. The overt and subtle stigmas attached to alcoholism and addiction are very powerful and if not well-managed in the recovery process can inhibit progress. Accepting responsibility is a step forward, accepting blame from yourself or others is a step backwards. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bibblies Posted February 23, 2003 Report Share Posted February 23, 2003 Says Fiery Jack: I just act like a 3 year-old asshole when I'm drunk. Not as big an asshole as I did a few years ago, but I'm still in the general playpen. Some people act like assholes when they're sober. I don't, so at least I have that for comfort. My girlfriend says I'm just 'boring' when I'm drunk because I repeat the same uninteresting things over and over and over again. Hey! A lot of people have told me that I'm "lovely" when I'm drunk, which makes it a lot harder to stop! Spare a thought for us folks out there! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Hippie Posted February 23, 2003 Author Report Share Posted February 23, 2003 "... OH, how are you getting on with the detox? Or have you slid off the wagon again? Either way, best of luck..." Well, ah, I kinda... I did o.k. for 3+ weeks, then slid. sort of back and forth kinda thing. I was blaming the problems at work, but more of an excuse. I seeing the doctor again to discuss treatment options. basically, the "falls" were minimal, one or 2 drinks, so not as bad, but truthfully, I did want more. So maybe learning to control it, then quiting all out will be easier, who knows...? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OCgringo Posted February 23, 2003 Report Share Posted February 23, 2003 Old Hippie keep trying.....you can do it PS.....are you drinking at home or at the bars ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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