Would you tell? the Poll

[Zaad]

Yes, what you say is true, dentists must be careful at all times.

However...for some reason they're asked to be extra careful when dealing with HIV patients.

 

Accidents may always happen but perhaps with the highest amount of concentration they can minimize that by for example not leaving dental intstruments on the table after usage but clean immediately etc.

Certain treatments may require 1 hour + or so and some dentists are simply lazy to clean all instruments and only do it once the treatement is completed. When one KNOWS the patient is HIV-infected one will be encouraged to order the assistant to clean every instrument ASAP. Just a precaution to minimize the possibility of an accident.

[Nervous_Dog]

OK - interesting, about 80% would tell, 20% would not, however only 1/2 would get a test done! No to me that just does not make sence!

 

Dog

[soongmak]

No difference wrt ethics.

 

I guess you and me have a different feeling about what is ethical. Just because I am privvy to the fact that someone is HIV-positive, does that give me the right to barge in her private life and tell every boyfriend that I happen to come across that's she's HIV-positive? That is not ethical in my book. It is a gross invasion of her privacy, and I have no rights to do so, especially since I don't know what is going on between the two.

 

I don't know what poster brought up the vigilante issue, but I agree, and personally am not comfortable with it.

 

Cheers,

 

soongmak

[Zaad]

That is indeed interesting.

 

The question was:

"2 Before you begin a steady relaitionship that may include non safe sex, do you both get tested for HIV?"

 

I think, quite sure actually, that the reason for such is that those "no test" voters would simply trust her by her word if being asked about HIV. And most of us probably know it for ourselves.

 

That's the problem nowadays and I don't really blame people for that. We love and trust our partner. Partner would never lie and hurt another about such an important matter. Yet, we're wrong. Girl does deny, we're speechless, etc etc. Too fucking late!

 

Why not test? If she's willing, great, if she's not then she has some explaining to do.

[Zaad]

Soongmak,

"I don't know what poster brought up the vigilante issue, but I agree, and personally am not comfortable with it."

 

That surprises me.

Say you are in such situation (god, I hope you never will) would you be pissed at me for telling you or at her for NOT telling you? Both perhaps?

Would you uberhaupt care WHO told you? I think you should worry about more important matters, mister, such as the fact that she lied to you (or kept very valuable info from you, same thing in this case) and that your loved one has no problems exposing you to the disease.

[soongmak]

I think you should worry about more important matters, mister, such as the fact that she lied to you (or kept very valuable info from you, same thing in this case) and that your loved one has no problems exposing you to the disease.

 

Tsk, tsk, no reason to call me mister.

 

You and all the other vigilantes (sorry, couldn't resist :: ) are assuming all kinds of things about the RT when you're even not there. Maybe she doesn't expose him to HIV. Maybe they don't have sex for now. Maybe she's waiting for the right moment to tell him. There are a gazillion things you are not (and will never be!) aware of regarding their RT, but you are so quick to judge and feel a need to help someone who maybe, doesn't need your help at all. What I do know is you're willing to invade someone's privacy big time without having all the info, and that is a big in my book.

 

Your insistant tone convinces me more and more that disclosing this info is not the way to go.

[Zaad]

"You and all the other vigilantes (sorry, couldn't resist :: ) are assuming all kinds of things about the RT"

 

So are you, mister ..

I counted 4 'maybe's' in your post, well maybe not.

We're all assuming.

 

I chose to give him the facts IF I happen to see him. That would personally make me feel better, just like her, selfish me.

 

"Your insistant tone convinces me more and more that disclosing this info is not the way to go. "

So if I post "don't tell" 20x you're conviced you should?

Just replying to people in this discussion, sorry if I appear one too many times, live with it

[soongmak]

Zaad said:

"You and all the other vigilantes (sorry, couldn't resist :: ) are assuming all kinds of things about the RT"

 

[color:"red"] So are you, mister ..

I counted 4 'maybe's' in your post, well maybe not.

We're all assuming. [/color]

 

Ehrm, no, I am not. I say I don't have enough info to warrant such an intrusion, while you obviously do.

 

[color:"red"] So if I post "don't tell" 20x you're conviced you should? Just replying to people in this discussion, sorry if I appear one too many times, live with it [/color]

 

Off course I am not changing my mind because you would say so. I need arguments to convince me, and so far I haven't seen enough to make me change my mind. What I meant to say is, that you seem so awfully sure about what's the right thing to do, without having all the facts. To me, it seems that is more a question of belief with you than rationale and that is making me uncomfortable.

[soongmak]

That surprises me.

Say you are in such situation (god, I hope you never will) would you be pissed at me for telling you

 

No Zaad,

 

I would NOT be pissed at you for telling me. In fact, I would be glad. It is always good to have the info.

 

Does this mean that I think you should tell me? No, I don't. You're messing with other people's lives, and if everybody behaved like that HIV-positive people would soon be pariahs, because after all, matters of life and death overrides a person's right to privacy in your opinion. The big question is, where does this all stop? Do you tell the next BF? And the next? If she still doesn't listen, lock her away? Lock up everybody who's HIV positive? Once you start overstepping initial boundaries, the next boundary is easily taken. I am actually quite surprised that a majority of the people in this poll have no problems with this breach of privacy, and I find that troubling.

[AF16]

soongmak said:

That surprises me.

Say you are in such situation (god, I hope you never will) would you be pissed at me for telling you

 

No Zaad,

 

I would NOT be pissed at you for telling me. In fact, I would be glad. It is always good to have the info.

 

Does this mean that I think you should tell me? No, I don't. You're messing with other people's lives, and if everybody behaved like that HIV-positive people would soon be pariahs, because after all, matters of life and death overrides a person's right to privacy in your opinion. The big question is, where does this all stop? Do you tell the next BF? And the next? If she still doesn't listen, lock her away? Lock up everybody who's HIV positive? Once you start overstepping initial boundaries, the next boundary is easily taken. I am actually quite surprised that a majority of the people in this poll have no problems with this breach of privacy, and I find that troubling.

 

You miss the point. People with HIV is not pariahs, but people that willingly endanger people of getting HIV should get an reaction. In fact if you have sex with someone back here, have AIDS, and do not tell, you go to jail.

 

If they inform sexual partners that they got HIV there is no problem.