Good books Thai/farang r'ships, eg Private Dancer

[voodoo31]

Was reading a post where the book ?My Name Lon, You Like Me?? was mentioned and said to be a good read.

 

I haven't read that one but recently read "Private Dancer" and thought it an excellent read. He seemed to really nail some of the scenarios from the "lazy Thai boyfirend in the background" to the peripheral characters - like the long term guys who had started to go with katoeys. Liked the way he wrote the story as a series of excerpts from the individual characters. It really allowed you to contrast the different points of view.

 

Have read a Chris Moore novel but wasn't overly impressed - not in terms of insights of the Thai - farang points of view.

[limbo]

There's some good books out there.

 

Try the one where a bunch of the various bar girls letters are collected. Title something like; Honey honey.........(something)

or is it; My dear Honey..........?

[khwaimaisabai]

Hi voodoo,

Good comments. I too am not a great fan of Christopher Moore, and I liked the way Private Dancer was presented as successive descriptions (often of the same events) by different people taking a different angle.

The situations and characters are true to life and no doubt based on observations. In fact, a well known Bangkok persona;ity told me that it was actually closely based on a true life story, either involving the author himself or a close friend.

The danger is to take this as a definitive account of the whole of the issues surrounding farang/bg relationships. Not all Thai boyfriends are lazy pimps, not all long time time residents like katoeys and view bg's with contempt, etc. I have seen comments on this board as if PD was something other than a work of fiction.

A good read, many fascinating insights, but not the whole story by a long way.

Khwai

[FAT_AUSSIE]

I think you may mean-Hello My Big Big Honey! Love Letters to Bangkok Bar Girls and Their Revealing Interviews by Dave Walker and Richard S. Ehrlich

[Stickman]

"Thailand Fever" is a very practical book and one I?d thoroughly recommend if you see yourself getting into a serious recommendation with ANY Thai woman.

[voodoo31]

Yes good point, it is by no means a definitive description of all Thai / farang relationships. I think everyone has there own interpretations and experiences, even if there are some common threads.

 

And take your point about long termers and Katoeys but I did have a funny experience just before reading the book. I was in Phuket doing the Patong bars with some friends and long term residents. One was talking to me very seriously about the strong points of going with Katoey - the 3 holes, good blow job. All I could think at the time was 'mat, you've been here to long' but didn't say it of course. And then a few days later I read the book and he could have almost been one of the characters.

 

Another book, although not fiction, I read was "It's all about the money' written by an Aussie guy based on his experiences in Pattaya and his tips for farang getting involved with bar girls. In many ways I didn't relate to this book and felt he had missed out on something during his trips. I gather he had first started coming already well into middle age and thought he missed some of the fun, often not totally about the money experiences younger guys have when visiting such places. Once again individual experiences and impressions.

[pattaya127]

I gave my (negative) opinion about private dancer (generic take of being fatalised, not corresponding to the common experience, THANK GOD!), for me the best is still that 1958 "woman of BKK" novel by Jack Reynolds. A bit on the hard fall side too, but the psychology of the guy, blinded by infatuation and stubborn do-gooding, is spot on.

 

Cleo Odzer's "patpong girls" has nailed it well too, to the point of boringness after 100 pages, since it's not a novel.

 

PS: ER...Private dancer, are we talking about that 16 pages stuff that does the net rounds once in a while, or a book? The one I remember, net, the guy is being taken to the cleaners, to the tune of 10 000s$ and shown the door, by the TG/TH(ubbie). This is not 1/1000 experiences of a farang with a BG, which i would say, is not about too much money, when you think of it, more about psychology and culture shock conundrums.

 

I am sure that the realizations/befundlings about a BG over a few weeks with her, is duplicated over in a 30 year residency amongst thais and their country, by an expat. Some stuff is limpid, caveat emptor, and some a constant mistery, and for some, misery. Logical, the more you stay with a TG, even a BG, the more you see the thai in her.

[enigma]

I'm not sure I understand what you mean by Thai/farang "relationships," but I was skimming a book the other day co-written by a Thai/farang couple. On each left page it has an English discussion on a topic about relationships, with each right page having the Thai translation. I didn't catch the title, but it seemed to be a good idea for those who are actually in a "relationship" with a TG, i.e. it's not a typical farang rant about "those evil BGs."

[Old Hippie]

Stickman said:

"Thailand Fever" is a very practical book and one I?d thoroughly recommend if you see yourself getting into a serious recommendation with ANY Thai woman.

 

I know both of these authors personally, both go to my tmeple here (nose in the air boastfully! ). They did a lot of research on this, and asked a lot of opinions before the final cut. The good part is, it is written in English and Thai, and does a decent job of trying to explain some major stumbling blocks, and cultural differences.

 

2 points I am on record of disagreeing with, 1) are just telling your family she was a former nightlife girl/sex worker (if she was) or saying up front she was not, and making an issue to point it out. I said say nothing, adress the question only if it comes up, and you want to adress it honestly.and 2) Meeting the girls family. This is a case to case basis. In some cases it means everything, in others, it means nothing... So I wouldn't go on the assumption that automatically ment anything...

 

In the end, they went with"generally speaking" opinions/concepts, which I guess is o.k. if presented as such. Worth a look.

[Guest]

 

 

Ever thought of writing one yourself mr stick?