Guest Posted March 2, 2002 Report Share Posted March 2, 2002 I have read these boards for a month or so and they make great reading. Hearing of so many people's different experiences in Thailand is really cool. However, one thing that strikes me is the amount of stereotyping. I am not married to a BG, so I can't comment too much there. On the topic of 'normal' Thai girls however, I guess I have a fair bit of experience. My wife is a Thai professional person (in a medical field) I am friends with many many 'normal' Thai people, ranging from Nurses to singers through to Uni students through to a girl who owns comic stores in Chiang Mai. I am 31, my wife is 28...so I am talking about people predominantly in our age groups. One thing I can say about everyone I know is that...they are all different. Naturally, the culture and religion is a generally common feature. All are genuinely good hearted people / kind in their nature. Individually though...people differ. Some like to go drinking and singing, some like to go to the movies or stay in and read a book, some like to just chat at friends places. My wife's two best friends are a girl called Kung and a girl called Som. They are both really cool people, but they are nothing alike. Kung is very homely and would do absolutely anything to help anyone. (I always remember my wife telling her I missed biscuits, and the next day Kung came over on her bike with a tray of over 50 biscuit varieties) Conversely, Som would have forgotten what my wife said a moment later and never considered doing something so nice. The point is, they are both 'normal' Thai girls, but there persona's are very different. I think sometimes people seem to categorise Thai's a little too much. From my experience, that's way too restrictive. Meet people with an open mind and see how you get on with each other. Don't expect someone to fit the stereotypes you can read on these boards. If you stereotype her as a 'Thai' girl...and she stereotypes you as a 'farang', then you won't have much future. Personally, me and my girl fell in love over a few years. We realised that we have just about everything in common...from attitude to life, music, humour etc. I do love the fact she is Thai and proud of her culture and has the inherent values that many Thai people have. I married her though, because she's my best friend and I love her. If anyone is looking for a relationship that's going to work, that's got to be somewhere on the criteria I'd think...!... As stated, I haven't had experience with B/G's, apart from talking to them at a Hospital my wife used to work at...chatting occasionally informally while waiting to buy a movie ticket etc with my wife...while shopping (yes...b/g's do normal things also!) From my limited experience, they are individuals also and don't deserve the stereotype they are given. If you meet someone who YOU think is cool...then give her a chance. Just like 'normal' Thai girls, don't pre judge too much. My Mrs was helping a b/g in her hospital one day and the b/g called her 'sister' because my wife was older than she was. It's a sign of respect. Another day, an older b/g was there and my wife called her 'sister'...respecting her as the elder of the two. My wife is successful and educated, but she'd never criticise or look down upon someone because they are a b/g. I think that's good advice for EVERYONE here...towards all Thai people. Go to Thailand and enjoy the people...try and meet and get to know people individually. It will be the best thing you ever do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 2, 2002 Report Share Posted March 2, 2002 quote: Originally posted by Monkey: I have read these boards... <snip> ...try and meet and get to know people individually. It will be the best thing you ever do. I read your first and last sentence, and nothing in between. Such is how many folks scan long diatribes. Kindly do not "lurk then lecture," Number One. Wade in... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
think_too_mut Posted March 2, 2002 Report Share Posted March 2, 2002 I witnessed situations where signs of common kindness and respect were shown to bgs and vice versa but thought that was a rare exception. Glad to hear it happens more often. Also, I have given a chance to a bg that I think is cool and it is working, so far. Nearly a year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 2, 2002 Report Share Posted March 2, 2002 Be happy with whatever GF you've got. If your relationship works - thumb up. BG or not. We all accumulated different experience. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 2, 2002 Report Share Posted March 2, 2002 think_too_mut...it happens quite often. i know from going out with my wifes friends to quite a few places where the waitresses are ex b/g's and they always laugh and tease with them just as they do with anyone else. i think thai women share a 'sisterhood' that is quite strong. there is also a sense with Buddhism that everyone is in multiple life cycles...and that everyone can have bad and good. that's really cool that it's working for you guys. buen jai...spot on! :-) i'd rather be with a good hearted b/g any day than a poor hearted 'normal girl' and vice versa. splunge...and thus you don't know what the hell i posted. mai pen rai. [ March 02, 2002: Message edited by: Monkey ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lamock Chokaprret Posted March 3, 2002 Report Share Posted March 3, 2002 Monkey, That was a great first post. Unfortunately, this world contains way too many people that are into stereotyping. Hell, I'm sure I've been guilty of it sometimes. Maybe everybody does it. I've come down on some people on this board for stereotyping bgs. I have the pleasure to know a great one (ex-bg). But you have to chalk it up to experience and probably one bad experience too many. I think an important part of your post is the great attitude most Thais seem to have. One of the reasons it's my intent to stay in Thailand as long as possible. There goes that stereotyping again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 3, 2002 Report Share Posted March 3, 2002 IT IS REFRESHING TO SEE THAT NOT EVERYONE IN THIS WORLD IS CYNICAL. THANKS FOR THE "OTHER SIDE" OF THE STORY. ONE GETS OUT OF A RELATIONSHIP WHAT HE OR SHE IS WILLING TO PUT IN. I AM A 60 YEAR OLD THAT HAS BEEN AROUND THE WORLD A TIME OR TWO BUT STILL IS A FEW THINGS TO LEARN. HOWEVER RESPECT GETS RESPECT. AND YOU CANT BUY LOVE....ONLY LUST. I HAVE A SPECIAL FRIEND THAT IS/WAS A BG. WE LAUGH ALOT, HUG ALOT, ENJOY EACH OTHERS COMPANY. BUT WE ALSO KNOW THAT TWO CULTURES CANNOT BE COMBINED IF WE BOTH DONT GIVE UP A LITTLE. CARRY ON SON...AND GOOD LUCK. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 4, 2002 Report Share Posted March 4, 2002 hi i live in south africa......i have had the opportunity of visiting thailand about two years ago and i must say that the women that i met were respectfull...(i visisted some bars and resturants) my friend is married to a thai girl that worked in sa (BG) and she has become a very good friend of mine.they dont loose their habbits (smoking,drinking etc) but they are kind and generous in their own way...... maybe im living in a dream world but some thai girls are honest and kind and only work to support their poor families... (i am not a falang) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crash999 Posted March 5, 2002 Report Share Posted March 5, 2002 quote: Originally posted by Monkey: Go to Thailand and enjoy the people...try and meet and get to know people individually. It will be the best thing you ever do. Certainly an admirable goal, but one must keep in mind that the association of people and behavior is often TRUE. There's a common and accepted word to describe this- culture. Culture does not have to be at a national level. It can be trans-national or it can describe small-group behavior. Hence, although it's a worthy goal to try and keep an open mind when meeting any individual, knowledge of that person's background and their environment will often predict that person's behavior. Cheers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 5, 2002 Report Share Posted March 5, 2002 Hi Crash Excellent point...and very true. I guess I'd taken that bit for granted, presuming most people here know the culture etc already. Also, the Northern culture is very different from the south. I am biased to the North:-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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