lembeh Posted July 31, 2006 Report Share Posted July 31, 2006 >Farang culture says being honest and open is a good thing, it creates trust.....Thai culture is based on not losing face and lying (check out how many unhappy marriages there are in Thailand....a shitload trust me!)...in this instance the better is the farang way (not always the case, but this time we have it in the bag). Why accept a flawed M.O.? For some one braying his intelligence and the accomplishment of a polysyllabic Masters degree - that comment sure is a boner of a mistake. That statement is called a "value judgment". In short it means you are judging something in terms of your own education and up bringing. Essentially you are unable to objectively assess the situation. Who are *you* to decide that the "thai way" is the "wrong way"? In this situation, where we are in their society, we should be adapting to their (functioning) society, rather than imposing (or trying to impose) our own moral value system on them. Most of the grief that farangs get come from their inability to adapt to - or tolerate - a system that has a different set of values and a different way of working. Sorry mate - I agree with the others, you have zero creditability. -j- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AF16 Posted July 31, 2006 Report Share Posted July 31, 2006 Josh-ingu; I'm a moral relativist so in theory I should agree with you but I don't. There is nothing that say you have to accept someones culture blindly. To accept that others might have diffrent values than you does not mean you should agree, follow, or not make your case for a diffrent way. What is importaint in a relationship is that you treat the other with respect and understanding and that you talk things out. Just now the missus and I have some problems regarding bringing up a child. In Thailand you can spank, pinch and yell at a child, in Norway you can not. Be it we stay in Thailand or Norway, with the knowledge about the development of children, I will not and have not accepted any spanking any pinching or any yelling at the child. I have documented why, we have talked and we have come to a conclution that is close to mine. In other cases the missus have gotten her view through. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lembeh Posted July 31, 2006 Report Share Posted July 31, 2006 >Josh-ingu; I'm a moral relativist so in theory I should agree with you but I don't. Let me get this straight. You own moral philosophy says that you should agree with me, but you don't and therefore you will argue with me. I would say, first sort out what you *do* beleive in and then get back to me. Starting from a position in which you contradict your own personal beliefs does not strike me as a good starting point for you. However, to make it easier for you, the point I was saying was that ZN is in no position to judge Thai society (and to say its "wrong") by his own criterion. It works for them, and any thing else is mere cultural imperialism. "I" know better is never a good arguing point. However, I agree with you that "we" do not have to "accept" (accept can have two interpretations here which I think its cauing the problems, accept can mean "to take into yourself" or "accept" can mean to allow another person to do/believe something) the Thai philosophy/way of life etc (in that *we* do not need to start doing these things). We need to "accept" (or *understand*) that that is how *they* do things, even if we do not agree with it. Saying that "our" cultural system is "right" or "better" (or whatever) is the roots of cultural bigotry. Thais *do* have a right to run their society as they see fit. If we work/live in the society, we had better bloody well understand what makes them tick, or we are in for years of pain. ZN's comment are one of the classic symptoms of "culture shock" - i.e. the way that they do it here is *wrong*....and then the attempt to change the society instead of adapting to it. A lack of adaption always means a failure to be comfortable in that society. Adapting to the society does NOT mean that *we* have to start lying our heads off, but at least to factor it in as a possibility in dealings within the society (and to mark it down as one of the cultural traits that we need to "accept" as a way of life). Now as to the *real* point of the thread - I am in 100% agreement with this bit: >What is importaint in a relationship is that you treat the other with respect and understanding and that you talk things out. and if you go back and read my earlier posts you will find this is almost exactly what I said. They need to talk and reach some mutually agreeable compromise about their relationship - and the mechanics of their reltionship. *she* has to overcome her cultural upbringing (to an extent) and realize that "honesty" is as important to farangs as "face/greng jai (insert concept here)" is to Thais. And *he* needs to understand that she has an up-bringing that carries with it a different set of values to those he is used to. *If* they can *understand* each others points of view, there is some hope for the relationship, if they cannot understand (or cannot be bothered to understand) the relationship is doomed. However, without the *effort* to talk and understand (on BOTH sides) they may as well pack it in now... -j- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChristianTroy Posted July 31, 2006 Report Share Posted July 31, 2006 If I can take your "real" pussy away from you by waving 2000 Bht under her real nose. How really real is your real pussy? REALLY Sweet a REAL pussy would laugh at you or maybe bitch slap you, a real pussy is no hooker, she is girl that has a ONS with a guy she likes! A hooker that is attracted to a punter knows she is getting money anyways, you believe you could out bid me with 2000 baht? ROFL We are not talking about gogo bars S1, we are talking about "real" life illusions like shopping malls or clubs. It is a nice theory which you have to proof first because I don't see a man coming on to my girl walking out with her, I see him going to the dentist at the next morning (j/k) anyways, we are talking about pussy, no romances, the pussy can do whatever she wants but thanx for admitting that you have to pay in order to get her because that was my point! no offense S1, just fooling around! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChristianTroy Posted July 31, 2006 Report Share Posted July 31, 2006 Sandawg: Fuckin funny So what is better to have: looks or money? Looks are fleeting, money is forever... I am greatful to be financially competetive with you grandfathers lol Money is forever? uhm, not in Thailand, remember? Punters check their brain at the customs and and buy a better phone to some girl he barely knows, he buys her gold and he supports her with a big handful of money every month. He "makes house" for her family and supports every part of her family that ever babysitted her for longer than 2 days! No Money is not forever in Thailand! No No No! The older the punter the higher the desperation and the temptation to compensate with money! The bad news is that after 20 years we are all old and broke Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AF16 Posted July 31, 2006 Report Share Posted July 31, 2006 Josh-Ingu, I do agree with my self, but the stereotype of moral/cultural relativist is one who accept everything, I do not agree with this stereotype. I think while there are no rules set in stone we all build our own subjective valuesystem. I have mine, my wife has hers, and somehow we will have to work differances out in a way that both are happy with over the long run. It means that she have to adjust sometimes and that's between her and me and not me and Thailand. It's between her and me and not her and Norway. We live in Norway but I'm not expecting her to blindly follow Norwegian customs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sanddawg1 Posted July 31, 2006 Report Share Posted July 31, 2006 CT I thought we were talking about BGs; not regular girls? The impression you were personifying was that BGs could not wait to leave with you because youâ??re â??young and handsomeâ? and they would ignore â??old fartsâ? like me with their money. You might be surprised if you met this â??Old Fartâ? maybe even learn a thing or two. All in good Fun S1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChristianTroy Posted July 31, 2006 Report Share Posted July 31, 2006 CT I thought we were talking about BGs; not regular girls? The impression you were personifying was that BGs could not wait to leave with you because youâ??re â??young and handsomeâ? and they would ignore â??old fartsâ? like me with their money. You might be surprised if you met this â??Old Fartâ? maybe even learn a thing or two. All in good Fun S1 I am sure i can learn 3 or 4 things from you old man and the other way around! Everybody can learn from each other, as I could profit from your experience so you could profit from some of my stories. The main thing is that it works just well for both of us! Anyways, I was talking about all girls in LOS, even the tourists Dunno where I said it, i posted that I am not bar fining girls because it is not what I want, see,pick,fuck doesnt make me horny! I exchange numbers if I like the girl and meet her somewhere else! In a gogo bar where they don't know yu and me I am just a customer, many girls there would prefer you instead of me, better quicker faster money, less "yack yack" etc.. My first girl on my first visit to Pattaya turned me down with the words "too hansum, i not want think to you too mud!" I gave her 500 baht for that ego booster and now she is one of my rocks here! no offense taken S1, we just having fun! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChristianTroy Posted July 31, 2006 Report Share Posted July 31, 2006 double post! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Topcatta Posted July 31, 2006 Report Share Posted July 31, 2006 Why do you assume "old?" man are not capable of "yack yack" so much anymore? That depends on the guy and on the game available. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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