Tiger Moth Posted September 7, 2008 Report Share Posted September 7, 2008 Let me begin by speaking about a real situation from my own experience. I knew a Thai woman for a significant amount of time. She was not a prostitute (I have nothing against prostitutes). She came from Issan, from very hard circumstances. She had managed to make it. Out of her initial schooling (age 15, if I am not mistaken), 2 people advanced, she and one other. She completed her Uni degree. She was 29 years old when I met her. At the same time, there was someone on Thai360 who seemed to be a marginal personality (meaning: he seemed to be hanging on the cliff between sanity and insanity). At one time, he had to publicly apologize on Thai360 (actually the predecessor, nanaplaza.com) for having lied in his criticism of Eden (so, many of you will recall this poster). For whatever reason, a good friend of the owner of Eden, PMâ??d me several times about this poster - Anyway, my view was, postings on Thai360 should be treated the same as attorney:client communications, the same as Catholic church confessionals â?? that is, completely confidential and not to be discussed in any way, shape or form outside of Thai360. So, although I wanted to warn my Thai lady friend, although I met them together and knew who he was, I said nothing. I hoped my Thai lady friend would see him for what he was. But, I did not feel I could intervene. She later married this guy. But, it was a remote marriage. He continued to live in his home country and she continued her life as usual. I would like to think she dumped him before he retired and moved to Thailand to live with her. I donâ??t know what happened. Anyway, the point is, in my view, on Thai360 we are anonymous (why else donâ??t we use our real names) and what is posted is confidential as are our identities. If one happens to meet someone else at a Friday night meeting and strike up a friendship, one can then discuss these issues and make what ever arrangements are mutually acceptable with respect to confidentiality. This may seem like a slight aside but, please indulge me. I have confidence that if I really wanted to do so, I could determine the identity of Suadum. I pick Suadum because he comes from Detroit, I worked there for half a year and come from a similar environment. He posts often, very interesting, informed posts. He has also posted about some â??naughty behaviorâ?Â. I am sure, I could find out who he is. And, with this knowledge, I could potentially do him harm. Would I ever do this? NEVER!!! If I wouldnâ??t breach the confidentiality of Thai360 for an innocent Thai lady whom I had known for a long time and had high regard for, would I ever breach Thai360 confidentiality. No! No! No! Never! Without this confidentiality and anonymity, Thai360 could not exist and would serve no function. With the confidentiality and anonymity, the users can get feedback on issues they would not discuss in public. Which brings me to the following: recently, I received a PM. The individual sending the PM asked â??arenâ??t you xxxxx?. I believe I met you sometime in the pastâ?Â. I replied, essentially, well since you donâ??t mind talking about who I am in real life, perhaps you will tell me who you are? The response to this was, â??someone told me you were xxxxâ? and â??your ex wife is still working at yyyy and doing fineâ?Â. I canâ??t begin to tell you how pissed I was and am. What the fcuk is the point of having Thai360 if this type of crap will go on? Note, the inappropriate poster did not reveal his identity, â??someone told meâ?Â. Well, fcuk you and the â??someoneâ? who told you. If I didnâ??t want confidentiality and anonymity, I would use my real name. How god damn presumptuous to PM me and speculate on who I am and to whom I have been married. Perhaps the asshole who PMâ??d me would like to reveal himself to everyone and explain. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
radioman Posted September 7, 2008 Report Share Posted September 7, 2008 I'm very much with you on this. Would even go so far as to suggest there should at least be some sort of statement in the signing up to the board that clearly states thou shalt in no circumstances 'out' a BM without their express permission blah blah blah. Not that there could be much retribution either way. I had a similar real life situation at a party with friends when a very close friend of my wife ratted me to my wife saying I was being overly and overtly attentive to another guest. No big deal as I was not, I have no interest in attempting to breed with aging mentally unstable buffalo. Wife knows very well that I find somethings here bewildering enough to just sit and watch and I can be a naughty boy but there are some boundaries that do not get crossed, like rubbing her nose in it. What really got to me was how her/our friend could make such comments on the back of what I know full well about her, being out with her and watching her go with guys, ST and LT without batting an eyelid or uttering a sound or a comment other than 'it's her life'. I could very easily drop in on her husband and give him all the details but never never never NEVER would. My understanding of things of this nature is that Thai people particularly, have little regard for personal privacy sometimes and are hugely insensitive gossips on occasion. T.M. You may need to disappear for a while or re-invent. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tiger Moth Posted September 7, 2008 Author Report Share Posted September 7, 2008 T.M. You may need to disappear for a while or re-invent. I agree and am planning on discussing this with KhunSanuk. But, while none of us use our real names, I have never seen this discussed previously. And, so, having been greatly offended by the PM I received and having had this issue brought to my consciousness, I thought it was worthy of General Discussion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
radioman Posted September 7, 2008 Report Share Posted September 7, 2008 Perhaps not a big issue in earlier times but as this board, and knowledge about it has grown, so it may become an issue. Indeed worthwhile to take a moment and consider, perhaps more for those living in LOS than outside, how many farangs do you know in Thailand? How many of those same farangs do you think have an interest in any of the things that this board is used for? How likely is it that you may know one or more other BM's but for their anonymity? How many farangs have you recommended this board too as a source of information? I'm sure there are several stories I have related here that I have also related to friends and which could identify me, so I may be known already. I think I have even revealed my board name to a couple of close friends when discussing the board with them but this is a personal choice done in the full belief that it carries a certain confidentiality. Think if I ever received a PM similar to the one you mention it would seriously piss me off too. I think working this through with KS is indeed your best outlet at the moment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hugh_Hoy Posted September 7, 2008 Report Share Posted September 7, 2008 Well, I for one, use my real name. However, I think it is naieve to expect that there are not some "kooks" floating in and out/off and on here and some mere kind of "oath in blood" won't change anything. There are a few private boards made up of "trusted" members who have been well-vetted and where, even there, a certain level of caution should be exercised. HH Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LookieLookie Posted September 7, 2008 Report Share Posted September 7, 2008 Frede has sent me a bunch of abusive PM's but I just ignore him. He's boring Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tiger Moth Posted September 7, 2008 Author Report Share Posted September 7, 2008 Well, I for one, use my real name. Well, anyone who is a declared candidate for the US Presidency, as you are, can not expect anonymity or privacy!! Hugh Hoy - great name, never would have suspected it was real!! Do you have any idea of the meaning of Hoy in Thai language? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
radioman Posted September 7, 2008 Report Share Posted September 7, 2008 55555 LL, Frede's not boring. It's been said many times, Frede's da man!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tiger Moth Posted September 7, 2008 Author Report Share Posted September 7, 2008 Frede has sent me a bunch of abusive PM's but I just ignore him. He's boring Let's get back to the topic. I was not talking about intra Thai360 squabbles. I was talking about the use of information posted within Thai360, used outside of Thai360. Totally different subject. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julian2 Posted September 7, 2008 Report Share Posted September 7, 2008 Yeah, I use my real Christian name here but it's not as if I'd be hard to find, posted a Google Earth Image of my house a few weeks back. I do have an alter ego that acts as the "Mr Hyde" side of my personality on a couple of other forums who covers his tracks fairly well. Funny how's things go, I heard a rumor that a few members were discussing "outing" another member this weekend for various reasons... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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