rovineye Posted March 22, 2003 Report Share Posted March 22, 2003 If you think they act the same in the company of women as they do with men that have no ties to their family (I usually play host for out of towners), then you are fooling yourself. My sampling size is to large to be relevant to social circles or locals within USA. I stand by my original post. To put it simpler, men are pigs by and large. None of that bothers me, and rose colored glasses are what keeps the world going around. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jasmine Posted March 22, 2003 Report Share Posted March 22, 2003 [color:"red"]None of that bothers me, and rose colored glasses are what keeps the world going around. [/color] I understand and accept your opinion. Jasmine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 22, 2003 Report Share Posted March 22, 2003 Hmm, if I remember correctly, over 50 % of men are cheating. And over 45 % of women. (This are europeen numbers). rovineye, from what type of men have you your experience? And maybe it is true that men are pigs but then women are not better at all! Best regards (I would never cheat on my girlfriend, at least not without telling her :: . But then it would be the end of the relationship anyway.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rovineye Posted March 22, 2003 Report Share Posted March 22, 2003 Says naiv: rovineye, from what type of men have you your experience? Lots of white American engineers from the east coast. Vendors from all over US, England, Switzerland, and France. Various military officers. Trainers and educators from all over US. Scientists doing various experiments. Outside work, dart players I travel with for big tournaments. Many friends from the past who visit to horn in on the great San Diego weather. Of course close and distance relatives. Hash House Harriers from everywhere. Mountaineers and hikers from the northwest US and we travel around together. Where my experiences may be skewed is close proximity to temptations (Mexico). That and by definition the guys I travel with are not home-bodies. What I can say is that I am frequently surprised by the men that do not cheat! The ones I would most expect to, don't. The only talk crudely etc and always comment on girls walking by, but are straight shooters when it comes down to it. I admire these men. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 23, 2003 Report Share Posted March 23, 2003 Hi Gtharm, Let me tell you in more detail. [color:"red"] From your previous marriage, I'm certain that you already know that if someone cheats on you once, they will do it again. And again and again. You didn't explicity say that he cheated on you while you were together, but having bargirlS calling him, his sudden intentions to break up with you, and then going to Krabi with a "friend" are quite suspicious [/color] I do believe that he hasn't cheated on me after we met. Two bargirls who called him. He knew them 2 years ago at hardrock cafe when he came to Bangkok. He let me pick up the phone to prove that those women mean nothing for him. Whatever, none of them talked to me,they just hung up the phone after they heard my voice. Don't worry. I am not a woman who fights with other women because of my boyfriend. I was jealous but I rather talked to my boyfriend. The reason that he will go to Krabi with his friend because he owes this man. This friend paid for his airplane ticket and hotel without knowing this intention that we would like to come here to see me. (Is it true? ) His friend will leave Bangkok on April 6 and he would spend time with me until April 17. He said he would like to take care his friend. If I spend time with him,his friend might feel uncomfortable. All is what he said before and we also have planned going to Chiang Mai together. Everything seemed to be fine until I sent him an email to ask him about our relationship. I wanted to know what he would like to do about us....and Bang! he wanted to break up. I was definitely shocked and confused. In my opinion,I think he decided to break up because of his pressures. He has many problems. In this email, he said he didn't know when he could move to Bangkok and he couldn't start his business here as he has planned. He said for a longer period it was hard for both of us to resist the loneliness. He and I aren't Tom and Jerry. I have stopped calling him and let things happen in the way they should be................ I will survive, Snowdrop Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cardinalblue Posted March 23, 2003 Report Share Posted March 23, 2003 snowdrop, You can do a lot better. He wants to move on and so should you. His financial picture is quite disturbing and would be a big negative in my book. Regarding BGs, many guys will have a history with BGs. The key is whether he has any contact with them after he gets in a relationship with you. Don't hold him in contempt for what he did prior to you because i know many guys who would stop the BG thing once they find the "right" one. Long distance relationships can work but it takes something special. Recover quickly as there are many good guys out there for you to meet. Be positive and good things will happen for you..... Cardinalblue Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oldtimer Posted March 23, 2003 Report Share Posted March 23, 2003 Really sorry that things have worked out this way. You sound like a wonderful person, but your boyfriend seems to not know whether he is coming or going! If you are not hooked up with someone else I see no harm in your having a coffee with him to ask him some tough questions. Don't go to his room. If he is not prepared to make the commitment that you require, just forget him. There will be pain but you will get over it in time. By the way, don't be too tough on a guy in Starbucks. A lot of us chaps don't know a TBG from a TGG, so he simply tried his luck. Better to smile and just say, "No thanks." Chock dee! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
think_too_mut Posted March 23, 2003 Report Share Posted March 23, 2003 >Unfortunately he is declaring bankruptcy after he was laid off from his work for a few months. He has many pressures. I got laid off 4 months ago and no bankrupcy in sight. Not a pleasant situation but, if the need be, I can carry on doing nothing for years. Cannot believe that a man from the same profession as myself declares bankrupcy after only two months out of work. Besides, that's a very serious move that may fuck him up very badly, nobody does that light heartedly. Remote relationship: I am in one (with former bg), now almost a year and a half (after initial 8 months). Webcams, SMSs, everyday morning calls. Emails became too slow and we haven't exchanged one since January. Seems to be possible as long as there is a known end to it (in a month or two now but it was set at in January 2002). HS graduation is the triggering event. I think your bf is not honest with you. You can do better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crash999 Posted March 23, 2003 Report Share Posted March 23, 2003 Says check_bin_krap: He had bargirls calling him while you were together..Not only one even? For a guy to give out his phonenumber to a bargirl its more than one night of casual fun. I disagee with you here. If the guy was single and had an active social life then after he gets a girlfriend he will no doubt continue to get phone calls from girls wondering where he is or just calling for a chat. If the guy is faithful then it doesn't necessarily mean that he won't get a call from past girls or even BG regulars. It will invariably make his new girlfriend jealous but she'd have to understand that the girl is from his past and probably doesn't know that he now has a girlfriend. Reason I'm bringing this up is that it happened to me in the past- I got a girlfriend and she became very angry when a girl would call, as she'd automatically assume that I must be still shagging the chick, which wasn't true. Cheers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crash999 Posted March 23, 2003 Report Share Posted March 23, 2003 Says s_snowdrop: [color:"purple"]To make it short, last week I asked my boyfriend how our relationship would be end up since I was apprehensive about our future. I don?t believe that love can conquer everything but I do believe in my love for him. I am not a teenager. I married and divorced. I know how my heart feels. Whatever, an answer that I got from him is he would like to break up. I was shocked. I didn?t expect to get this answer. I always believe that we can make it. [/color] Looks like you put some pressure on him to move the relationship up to a more serious level and he just didn't want to do it, so he thought that he should break things up rather than lead you along. The things he told you about you benig the one he was looking for was probably the way he felt at the time. But then as time passed his feelings changed, perhaps when he was at home and he realized how difficult things would be. He also perhaps missed his days of being free and is heading down to Phuket or Pattaya to have some fun. Reason he didn't give you flight information is because he most likely isn't in Krabi and could already be in Thailand now. Regardless of the reasons, you should move on. Don't put yourself in the position of trying to chase after him to try and make it work out- you'll be putting yourself in a disadvantage to begin with and will drive yourself crazy. Cheers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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